I don’t burp. At least not often. When I do, I make a point of telling everyone I know, “I burped! First time this year!” and so on … I don’t think I’ve made it past six. I don’t understand how people can make themselves burp. Just the idea makes me want to throw up. And I really hate doing that.

My son, Alex, does neither burp nor throw up. He has a g-tube–a tube in his stomach through which he feeds by means of a pump and formula–and at six months of age he had a fundoplication. Rather than try to explain it myself, here’s Merriam-Webster’s definition:

Medical Definition of fundoplication

: a surgical procedure in which the upper portion of the stomach is wrapped around the lower end of the esophagus and sutured in place as a treatment for the reflux of stomach contents into the esophagus — see nissen fundoplication

It means he’s not physically able to burp, let alone vomit. So if he needs to do either, I attach a large syringe minus the plunger to the end of a tube in his g-tube and I vent him, which is basically opening up his stomach to the air by means of a tube. The air comes out along with whatever else needs to, and he’s good to go. It’s like farting without the smell. I often wish I had a tube in my stomach through which I could release gas at will. Going through the regular channels can get painful.

But poor little baby Alex had reflux like nobody’s business. He threw up everything that went in. We tried drugs that didn’t help. We tried different formulas. I even pumped my own milk for six months while he was in the hospital. He couldn’t keep that down, either. (He finally came out of the hospital at eight months of age.)

So, yeah. Where was I?

Burping. Right. Can’t do it. To me it’s like giving birth to an air bubble.

And I’m leaving you with that thought.

This post with probably too much information is brought to you by Stream of Consciousness Saturday. Click the link to find all the other bodily functions posts from other bloggers and join in too! https://lindaghill.com/2018/08/10/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-august-11-18/