Linda G. Hill

Life in progress


22 Comments

#SoCS – Romance – Caution! This post has nothing to do with romance.

I never wanted to be a romance writer. That is, I never set out to be one. I’m more of a relationship writer. And let’s face it, romantic relationships are something most of us strive for, at some point in our lives.

Being interested in behaviors and the thoughts that make us all tick makes it a bit of a no-brainer that I’d write about relationships. Behaviors were explained to me in a course I took, for whatever reason, to learn about what makes my Autistic son do the things he does, and to learn to curb some of his inappropriate and unwanted behaviors. The most interesting (to me) thing I took away from that course is that we all engage in social behaviors, whether positive or negative. All the time. Every time we communicate with another human — or I suppose any living thing — we exhibit behaviors in order to get the response we hope for in return.

Smiling at a stranger, for instance, is a positive behavior. If I smile at someone, I hope for a smile in return. Okay, stay with me on this – these are just examples. If I stand in the middle of a crowded street and start crying, it might be because I hope for someone to try to comfort me, or ask me what’s wrong. This can be seen as a negative behavior. Manipulative, perhaps. Or maybe it’s a genuine cry for help.

The most important part of this is that our children do things like the last example, all the time. Whether they’re Autistic or not. Knowing, as a parent, what is a genuine cry for help and what is simply a manipulative behavior bent on getting our attention can be tricky, but discerning the difference can be a valuable tool.

Go back to the smiling thing. If I smile at, say, ten people I pass on the street and not one of them smiles back, I’m going to give up. My behavior is obviously not giving me the response I’m going for. Rather, it’s being ignored. Now take the screaming, crying child. What is yelling back at them going to do? Encourage the behavior, because it’s giving them exactly what they’re seeking. Attention. No words, and no amount of negative behavior back at them is going to stop their crying. But if we ignore it… and sometimes it can take ten times before they get it… their behavior will stop.

In the ABA (Applied Behavior Analysis) program I was taking, it’s called “planned ignoring.” It’s very simple, and it works. I can attest to that.

Ah, romance. How the hell did I get here? Relationships. Right. All birds of the same feather. And this is why I’m a multi-genre but single-minded author.

This insanely all-over-the-place post is brought to you by Stream of Consciousness Saturday. Find the rules and the prompt here: https://lindaghill.com/2017/03/17/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-mar-1817/ and join in. It’s insanely fun!


48 Comments

The Friday Reminder and Prompt for #SoCS Mar. 18/17

Would you look at that! It’s Friday! And that means it’s time for your Stream of Consciousness Saturday prompt. Well, March Break is almost finished, and I’ve survived this long. The young’un is with his dad now (he finally made it down the newly-opened-but-not-completely-opened highway), so I’m enjoying a bit of peace and quiet for a few days. Anyhoo, here’s your prompt for this week:

Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is: “man.” Use it as a word by itself or find a word with “man” in it. Have fun!

After you’ve written your Saturday post tomorrow, please link it here at this week’s prompt page and check to make sure it’s here in the comments so others can find it and see your awesome Stream of Consciousness post. Anyone can join in!

To make your post more visible, use our SoCS badge! Just paste it in your Saturday post so people browsing the reader will immediately know your post is stream of consciousness and/or pin it as a widget to your site to show you’re a participant. Wear it with pride!!

Here are the rules:

1. Your post must be stream of consciousness writing, meaning no editing, (typos can be fixed) and minimal planning on what you’re going to write.

2. Your post can be as long or as short as you want it to be. One sentence – one thousand words. Fact, fiction, poetry – it doesn’t matter. Just let the words carry you along until you’re ready to stop.

3. There will be a prompt every week. I will post the prompt here on my blog on Friday, along with a reminder for you to join in. The prompt will be one random thing, but it will not be a subject. For instance, I will not say “Write about dogs”; the prompt will be more like, “Make your first sentence a question,” “Begin with the word ‘The’,” or simply a single word to get your started.

4. Ping back! It’s important, so that I and other people can come and read your post! For example, in your post you can write “This post is part of SoCS:” and then copy and paste the URL found in your address bar at the top of this post into yours.  Your link will show up in my comments for everyone to see. The most recent pingbacks will be found at the top. NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, such as Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.

5. Read at least one other person’s blog who has linked back their post. Even better, read everyone’s! If you’re the first person to link back, you can check back later, or go to the previous week, by following my category, “Stream of Consciousness Saturday,” which you’ll find right below the “Like” button on my post.

6. Copy and paste the rules (if you’d like to) in your post. The more people who join in, the more new bloggers you’ll meet and the bigger your community will get!

7. As a suggestion, tag your post “SoCS” and/or “#SoCS” for more exposure and more views.

8. Have fun!


8 Comments

#SoCS – Spring Forward and other ridiculousness

Well, I missed the deadline for my own prompt.  What a loser!! In my (self) defense, I was extremely busy playing Wii Party today, and basically trying to distract the kid long enough for him not to do all the things he does when he wants attention. Ah, what I’d give to have a sixteen-year-old who stays in his room and wants nothing to do with Mom for just a day.

So now that it’s Sunday, it means we here in North America (at least) are into our shortest day of the year. Not because of sunlight, but because we’re “springing forward.” We’re losing an hour of sleep… or are we? When I was kidless, I would have said yes. But kids wake up at the same time, regardless. They don’t look at the clock and say, ‘well, time to wake up because it’s 7 am already!’ No, they get up with the sun no matter what the clock says. So for us parents, it can mean a shorter day tomorrow instead of a shorter night tonight. Which means we can put them to bed an hour sooner and get more time tomorrow… or at least until the sun starts co-operating.

I’m probably not making an ounce of sense at this point. It’s 12:40, which means it’s 1:40… which means I should probably be in bed.

Yeah, let’s go with that.

This post is brought to you by yesterday’s Stream of Consciousness Saturday prompt. Check it out at the following link and read all the posts! You can even join in… late, like me! https://lindaghill.com/2017/03/10/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-mar-1117/


44 Comments

The Friday Reminder and Prompt for #SoCS Mar. 11/17

It’s late Friday afternoon (here), and time for your Stream of Consciousness Saturday prompt. My intentions were good, but today ended up being a bit rough around the edges. I have no idea where the time went!

Here’s your prompt for this week:

Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is: “short.” Use it any way you’d like. Enjoy!

After you’ve written your Saturday post tomorrow, please link it here at this week’s prompt page and check to make sure it’s here in the comments so others can find it and see your awesome Stream of Consciousness post. Anyone can join in!

To make your post more visible, use our SoCS badge! Just paste it in your Saturday post so people browsing the reader will immediately know your post is stream of consciousness and/or pin it as a widget to your site to show you’re a participant. Wear it with pride!!

Here are the rules:

1. Your post must be stream of consciousness writing, meaning no editing, (typos can be fixed) and minimal planning on what you’re going to write.

2. Your post can be as long or as short as you want it to be. One sentence – one thousand words. Fact, fiction, poetry – it doesn’t matter. Just let the words carry you along until you’re ready to stop.

3. There will be a prompt every week. I will post the prompt here on my blog on Friday, along with a reminder for you to join in. The prompt will be one random thing, but it will not be a subject. For instance, I will not say “Write about dogs”; the prompt will be more like, “Make your first sentence a question,” “Begin with the word ‘The’,” or simply a single word to get your started.

4. Ping back! It’s important, so that I and other people can come and read your post! For example, in your post you can write “This post is part of SoCS:” and then copy and paste the URL found in your address bar at the top of this post into yours.  Your link will show up in my comments for everyone to see. The most recent pingbacks will be found at the top. NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, such as Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.

5. Read at least one other person’s blog who has linked back their post. Even better, read everyone’s! If you’re the first person to link back, you can check back later, or go to the previous week, by following my category, “Stream of Consciousness Saturday,” which you’ll find right below the “Like” button on my post.

6. Copy and paste the rules (if you’d like to) in your post. The more people who join in, the more new bloggers you’ll meet and the bigger your community will get!

7. As a suggestion, tag your post “SoCS” and/or “#SoCS” for more exposure and more views.

8. Have fun!


41 Comments

#SoCS – Project-ing

I hadn’t realized until now how much time I was spending on the project I just finished. It was an awesome 150,000 word urban fantasy novel that I enjoyed working on immensely, but the energy it took? Maybe I need to learn to self-regulate a bit.

I mean, I’m sitting down now drinking a bottle glass of wine (no editing, honest 😉 ), and it occurred to me that this is the first time in almost two months that I’ve allowed myself such a luxury. Through all this time I’ve spend editing this novel, I’ve held back from relaxing — not even listening to music — in case I had an hour to work. I’ve worked on it at breakfast, lunch, and dinner, and right up until I’ve gone to bed at midnight. Not that whole time, but for what adds up to four to sometimes eight hours in a day.

In exchange for all this, I have experience. I have a better idea of how to project the amount of time it will take me to edit a novel of this size. Of course it all depends on the level of editing involved too, but I won’t bore you with those details. Suffice to say its given me a better understanding of my chosen career. You know, the one other than being an author, which may or may not earn me millions of dollars and scads of loyal fans. Haha.

I know I have a while to go before I can make any serious money in the editing field… and perhaps stream of consciousness writing that I’m morally obligated not to edit isn’t the time to talk about an editing career… but what the hell.

Cheers!

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This somewhat tipsy post is part of Stream of Consciousness Saturday, written Friday night and scheduled for early Saturday morning when it’s still a decent time to be drinking wine and not yet coffee. Here’s the link https://lindaghill.com/2017/03/03/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-mar-417/ Join in today! It’s fun!


61 Comments

The Friday Reminder and Prompt for #SoCS Mar. 4/17

Hi there! It’s Friday today, and time for your Stream of Consciousness Saturday prompt. Sorry I’m late this week – I’ve been hard at work all day finishing my first major editing job that wasn’t for my own book. It’s done and back with its author. Yippee! Here’s your prompt for this week:

Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is: “project.” Use it as a verb, a noun, or both. Have fun!

After you’ve written your Saturday post tomorrow, please link it here at this week’s prompt page and check to make sure it’s here in the comments so others can find it and see your awesome Stream of Consciousness post. Anyone can join in!

To make your post more visible, use our SoCS badge! Just paste it in your Saturday post so people browsing the reader will immediately know your post is stream of consciousness and/or pin it as a widget to your site to show you’re a participant. Wear it with pride!!

Here are the rules:

1. Your post must be stream of consciousness writing, meaning no editing, (typos can be fixed) and minimal planning on what you’re going to write.

2. Your post can be as long or as short as you want it to be. One sentence – one thousand words. Fact, fiction, poetry – it doesn’t matter. Just let the words carry you along until you’re ready to stop.

3. There will be a prompt every week. I will post the prompt here on my blog on Friday, along with a reminder for you to join in. The prompt will be one random thing, but it will not be a subject. For instance, I will not say “Write about dogs”; the prompt will be more like, “Make your first sentence a question,” “Begin with the word ‘The’,” or simply a single word to get your started.

4. Ping back! It’s important, so that I and other people can come and read your post! For example, in your post you can write “This post is part of SoCS:” and then copy and paste the URL found in your address bar at the top of this post into yours.  Your link will show up in my comments for everyone to see. The most recent pingbacks will be found at the top. NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, such as Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.

5. Read at least one other person’s blog who has linked back their post. Even better, read everyone’s! If you’re the first person to link back, you can check back later, or go to the previous week, by following my category, “Stream of Consciousness Saturday,” which you’ll find right below the “Like” button on my post.

6. Copy and paste the rules (if you’d like to) in your post. The more people who join in, the more new bloggers you’ll meet and the bigger your community will get!

7. As a suggestion, tag your post “SoCS” and/or “#SoCS” for more exposure and more views.

8. Have fun!


16 Comments

#SoCS – Compassion

How do we draw the line on compassion? Most of us have it, to some degree or another. It begins with learning how to share, in our toddler years. Which is probably one of the reasons those of us who lack it tend to bring up children who lack it too. Does it begin with consumerism? With the idea that if we work hard for something, it’s ours? Perhaps.

Where do we draw the line on who we’re willing to share with? We have compassion, naturally, for our family and friends. For those we care about who we have met. But how about the strangers we pass every day on the street? How about people who are marginalized and bullied… by even some of our governments? From the outside looking in, it seems to me there are two types of people – those who believe they and they alone are entitled to what they’ve worked for, and those who reach out and go to great lengths to help everyone. Or at least anyone they encounter.  Of course there are those of us who only wish we could save the world, and would if we had the resources.

I went in to a Tim Horton’s today for a bite to eat. Outside, there was a woman sitting with her back against the wall with a sign that read “Broke and Hungry.” She asked me as I walked in the door if I had any change. I told her I didn’t – it was the truth. I keep my change at home, saved for Alex’s bus rides. While I was sitting in the restaurant, the staff went outside and told her to leave. I didn’t think that was very fair.

I see people begging for money online all the time. Sometimes for money to save their lives, sometimes for things they simply want. I saw someone trying to raise $6,000 the other day so they could publish their book. I wanted to shake them and tell them there’s someone trying to scam you… do it yourself for free. And there are people out there with their tin cups… really, what’s the difference? One is braving the harsh weather, the other is using a device likely worth more than the outdoor beggar could hope for in a month. Yet who are we more likely to give our money to? Somehow, $5 on Paypal seems less than a dollar in cash, doesn’t it?

Does our compassion need to be clean? Do we find our sharing only worthy of going to those who can ask most eloquently… those who spend the most time in our faces?

Are we more likely to share with those who we have things in common? Yes? Why? How do we draw the line, when we consider everyone to be equal in our humanity? We all deserve to live. We all deserve what we work hard for. Yet sharing and compassion is what separates us from animals. It’s what makes us human.

Giving feels good. So give. I challenge you. No matter how.

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This challenging post is part of Stream of Consciousness Saturday. Check it out! https://lindaghill.com/2017/02/24/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-feb-2517/