Life in progress


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#SoCS – The Word I Hate the Most

There are a few words that get on my nerves and leave a bad taste in my mouth. No, “bitter” is not one of them. But the one word I really hate? The one I absolutely detest?

It’s the one I can’t remember.

The one that gets stuck on the tip of my tongue and I just can’t spit out.

Like the one I couldn’t remember tonight. It’s the word(s) for the old stripey colored thing you used to get on the TV when there was an emergency or when the station went off for the night. You know. The thing. The … coloured thingy.

(Do you remember what it’s called? I’ll tell you at the end of the post. Because if I had to suffer, so will you. Haha.)

Stephen King said once, or maybe a million times, that writers should never use a thesaurus. I’m sure at the time he said it he never had a word he couldn’t remember, because that’s a good 99% of the only use I have for one.

I’m not looking for a better word. I’m looking for THE word.

You know, the one I’ve forgotten.

Like test pattern. 😉

 

2019-2020 SoCS Badge by Shelley! https://www.quaintrevival.com/

This frustrating post was brought to you by Stream of Consciousness Saturday. Find the prompt here and join in! https://lindaghill.com/2021/07/16/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-july-17-2021/


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#SoCS – Oops!

I almost forgot to post my SoCS. It’s been a month since the last time I did one. And it’s been a hell of a month. Busy? Can you say busy? It’s been busy.

And worrisome. We never did figure out what’s wrong with Alex, though he does seem better. He went for a walk with me today, so that’s a huge improvement. But he still says his stomach hurts. So who knows? Stress?

Stranger things have happened.

Me?

I’ve been paralyzed every time I’ve thought about writing something. It’s not fear, exactly, but it kind of is. Anxiety, maybe? I dunno. Maybe I’m just totally out of practice.

Or I feel like I’ve got nothing to say.

I can write fiction.

Maybe I should write a fictionalized version of myself.

I could be rich.

I could be thirty again.

And skinny.

And totally healthy. Hell, I could write away my tinnitus! That would be awesome.

My fictional self could have silence.

I could even write the pandemic out of the world. Would you like that?

I would.

No “oops” there.

Life would be perfect.

For everyone.

2019-2020 SoCS Badge by Shelley! https://www.quaintrevival.com/

This fantastical post was brought to you by Stream of Consciousness Saturday. Find the prompt here and join in! https://lindaghill.com/2021/04/23/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-april-24-2021/


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#SoCS – Calculations

By my calculations, the weekend went by in a blink. Maybe not a mathematical calculation, but definitely a scientific one. Why? Because I said so.

Did your parents say that to you as a child? Mine did.

All day today, I’ve thought it was Sunday, but then I thought no, it’s Saturday. So I was wrongly convinced that I was wrongly convinced it was Sunday. And it was! (It’s Monday now, technically.)

Or is it?

Yes. It is.

What a weird day.

I saw a squirrel die today. Got run over.

That sucked.

Okay, not today, because today is Monday, and it’s only been Monday for 15 minutes. But Sunday. I saw a squirrel get run over. In front of a church, no less. On a … Sunday. Yes. It was Sunday.

I have a feeling I’m going to have nightmares tonight, and that really sucks.

I had nightmares last night. I was woken up by one of those emergency notifications to let me know there was an armed and dangerous man on the loose and to stay home.

So what did I dream about?

You guessed it.

I need a good night’s sleep.

Because this blinking weekend sucked.

By my calculations, at least.

2019-2020 SoCS Badge by Shelley! https://www.quaintrevival.com/

This sucky post was brought to you by Stream of Consciousness Saturday. Find the prompt here and join in! https://lindaghill.com/2021/03/19/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-march-20-2021/


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#SoCS – What day is it anyway?

A year later, and I’m still asking myself that question almost every morning when I wake up. The only reason I bother wondering? I need to know whether Alex is expected at virtual school. For me, every day is the same. Work. I do it seven days a week, most days from the time I finish breakfast ’til the time I go to bed. Minus time off for walks, interruptions from the kids, and to eat. Oh, and housework. I do that occasionally, too.

Day in, day out.

My consolation? My bright spot in the world. Writing books people enjoy, doing a good job when I edit and making my clients happy, and sending out prompts. Because aside from looking after my kids and making sure they’re as content as they can be, from this tiny room at this small computer it seems I can still make a difference in the world, and that is a truly great thing.

It constantly amazes me the reach we have. And if we choose to use it wisely, we can make a positive change in the world. Even when we’re stuck inside.

I’d like to take this opportunity to say thank you to all the people who have read my blog and participated in my prompts over the past year. I feel like I don’t express my appreciation enough, but I really do appreciate it. Because without you all, I’d be prompting the void. And the void doesn’t answer back. I might even go as far as to say it a-voids it. (Haha! Yes, I’m tired. But I still got it.)

What was I saying?

Oh yes.

Thank you. From the bottom of my heart. ❤

2019-2020 SoCS Badge by Shelley! https://www.quaintrevival.com/

This grateful post was brought to you by Stream of Consciousness Saturday. Find the prompt here and join in! https://lindaghill.com/2021/03/12/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-march-13-2021/


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#SoCS – I Can’t Believe it’s not Margarine

I grew up on butter, never margarine. My family hated the taste of it. And back when I was a child, it had a terrible flavor, kinda like butter that had gone slightly off. I don’t know how my mother always kept the butter so fresh. She must have used a lot of it, because it was never kept in the fridge. There was nothing quite as frustrating as trying to spread cold butter on fresh bread.

When I was an adult, I gave up on butter, but by then, margarine had improved. When I moved to Quebec (the province), I regularly bought what started out as margarine but they changed the name of it. To “Non-Hydrogenated Soy Spread.” No mention of margarine anywhere on the container. But it tasted like margarine, which, by that time, mostly tasted like butter.

I’m back to “Margarine” now–at least that’s what it says on the container. I miss butter. But we still call the stuff we put on our toast “Non-Hydrogenated Soy Spread” because why not?

It’s funnier. And it’s a mouthful. And who doesn’t want a mouthful when it comes to non-hydrogenated soy spread?

2019-2020 SoCS Badge by Shelley! https://www.quaintrevival.com/

This very late, definitely non-hydrogenated post was brought to you by Stream of Consciousness Saturday. Find the prompt here and join in! https://lindaghill.com/2021/03/05/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-march-6-2021/


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#SoCS – Misty

As I come to the end of a full year of being sequestered in my home with my three kids, I’m looking back and thinking never has there been a year so slow and yet so very focused. So focused, in fact that there aren’t many moments I think I’m forgetting. It’s the least misty year in my existence.

Because I haven’t done anything. I can remember details like beginning the year going to the grocery store on Fridays, and gradually working all the way back to Thursdays, Wednesdays, Tuesdays, Mondays and now Sundays. I haven’t been inside a store on a Saturday all year.

Imagine remembering that kind of thing in a normal year?

I’ve written stories–books, even. I’ve published two books and one short story. I’ve moved from sitting on the couch to a desk in the spare bedroom. I’ve been to two–count ’em–TWO live concerts in Japan without leaving my house. And I’ve learned that “zoom” isn’t just what cars do as they go by. I’ve walked more than a million steps without leaving my neighbourhood.

And I’ve had the honour of spending more time with my kids than I knew I could without going insane.

How has your year been?

2019-2020 SoCS Badge by Shelley! https://www.quaintrevival.com/

This very late, decidedly unmisty post was brought to you by Stream of Consciousness Saturday. Find the prompt here and join in! https://lindaghill.com/2021/02/26/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-feb-27-2021/


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#SoCS – The Nerve!

What nerve I’ve got, almost two days late responding to my own prompt!

But you know what? It’s like that meme that’s going around. We’ve been at this “stay at home” thing for so long, there’s nothing to talk about. Nothing new, anyway. So I sit here at my computer, waffling over what to write. I actually get nervous. (There’s those nerves again.) And then I wonder, what’s the point?

Just Jot it January was easy for me, because all I had to do was make stuff up. Fiction is so much more interesting than real life these days, isn’t it? In fiction, we can pretend sickness doesn’t exist.

Maybe I should make up a fictional life for myself. Then I could live vicariously through the fictional me. I’ve even got a picture of the fictional me in mind. Aren’t I cute?

Photo: A snowman made out of a pointy snowbank with a single ball of snow on top with two eyes, a nose, and a mouth, and two twigs for arms sticking out of the snowbank.

Yeah, looks like the fictional me has about as much of a life as the real me.

sigh

Sorry I’m late with my SoCS post. Almost a SoCM post now.

2019-2020 SoCS Badge by Shelley! https://www.quaintrevival.com/

This sad post was brought to you by Stream of Consciousness Saturday. Find the prompt here and join in! https://lindaghill.com/2021/02/19/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-feb-20-2021/


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#SoCS – Above and beyond

Okay, so what’s the opposite of above and beyond? Below and back? Below and insufficient? Doesn’t have much of a ring to it.

My expectations for myself, for the future, are often on the side of above and beyond. Which leaves me in a state of feeling inadequate and causes me stress. Which sucks.

Yet, those expectations are often what pull me through and help me succeed. I’m one of those types who waits until the last minute to do what I need to do in order to hit a deadline. Most of the time. I’m much better when I’m editing for a client. My self-control is far better.

So what’s that about? Basically, when you boil it down, it comes down to my caring about other people more than myself. The old, “It’s just for me, so it can wait” thing.

Turns out self-care is difficult.

Can you relate?

Oh, and happy Valentine’s Day to all you lovers out there. For the rest of us? Let’s love ourselves a little bit more today. ❤

2019-2020 SoCS Badge by Shelley! https://www.quaintrevival.com/

This off-the-rails post was brought to you by Stream of Consciousness Saturday. Find the prompt here and join in! https://lindaghill.com/2021/02/12/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-feb-13-2021/


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#SoCS – White Flag

This post started off in my head this morning. I was thinking about a white flag, not because I am or was waving one, but because I didn’t. For a while there, it looked like I might not get my novel ready to upload in time for the preorder date I have set on the retailers. On most of them, it’s not a big deal: you can change it. On Amazon, if you change your preorder date for a later one, you lose the privilege of setting a preorder date for a year.

But, against all odds, I managed to get it finished and uploaded. I never waved that white flag.

So why didn’t I post this post this morning when I thought of it? Because of a song.

It’s one I hadn’t heard in years. I listened to it all the time about ten years ago, though, and all I could remember was one line that went something like “I will not lie down.” So I searched the Internet. I Googled, I wracked my brain. Nothing came up. I couldn’t remember the name of the song nohow.

Until I stopped trying.

And damn me, the name of the song is “White Flag.”

Doh!

P.S. The lyric I was trying to remember that I got wrong was “I will go down with this ship.”

2019-2020 SoCS Badge by Shelley! https://www.quaintrevival.com/

This age-showing post was brought to you by Stream of Consciousness Saturday. Find the prompt here and join in! https://lindaghill.com/2021/02/05/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-feb-6-2021/


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#JusJoJan 30 & #SoCS – A day

(NOT FICTION)

At the end of a long, long day

that consisted of editing a novel that feels like it’s never going to end

I wonder how I’m going to make it to bed,

with so much still to do.

Because as it turns out,

A new day has already begun.

2019-2020 SoCS Badge by Shelley! https://www.quaintrevival.com/

This tired not-really-a-poem post was brought to you by Stream of Consciousness Saturday and Just Jot It January! Find the prompt here and join in!https://lindaghill.com/2021/01/29/the-friday-reminder-for-socs-jusjojan-2021-daily-prompt-jan-30th/