Linda G. Hill

Life in progress

#SoCS – Belonging

28 Comments

I think it’s going to be a long month. I signed up for NaNo Camp but I haven’t written a word yet. I haven’t even opened the story that I want to finish off for the NaNo project. I’m kind of at that paralised stage at the moment, where there’s so much to do I don’t know where to start so instead I play a mindless casual game in order to escape the pressure. And so I got this image in my head that I wrote about on my fiction blog about half an hour ago as my SoCS post over there for today. It’s fiction, but only in the sense that I’m not quite at that stage yet. I might be, before August gets here. You’ll find the link to that post in the comments below the link for this one – it’s not a long piece.

I sometimes wonder where I belong, you see. I belong to my family and to myself, to the extent that I have my own interests to pursue. I signed up for the editing course I’ve been talking about forever. It’s online at Simon Fraser University in BC, Canada. If I can earn the certificate I will have the opportunity to get into Editors Canada, the highest qualification in the land. From there I may start working toward my English degree. But that’s a long way off. I need the editing courses to freelance and earn the money I’ll need to get my BA.

At times I feel as though I belong to the world of literature. I thrive there. At times I feel like I’m biding my time, waiting to get there. But my responsibilities will always be at home, to my kids.  Now I have to decide what Chris, my middle son will do with the rest of his life. He’s ambitious but autistic and largely unable to secure a position anywhere for himself. He, too, would like to go back to school, to college, but he’s never been without one-on-one help. It’s scary for me to contemplate.

So many decisions, so little time. So much to do, and not long enough to do it. And yet, July will take forever to be over. What a paradox.

SoCS badge 2015

Stream of Consciousness Saturday is fun! Click the link to see how you, too, can join in! https://lindaghill.com/2016/07/01/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-july-216/

Author: LindaGHill

There's a writer in here, clawing her way out.

28 thoughts on “#SoCS – Belonging

  1. Good for you!! I went back to university at 35 to get my degree and it all started with a certificate in gerontology which got me the job to pay my way through school…working part time, raising the family…the journey was priceless…I learned as much (if not more) outside. Good on you!! All the best. I intend to work on my Masters once I turn 65 next year as it is free for us oldies in most Canadian universities 🙂

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  2. Being a mom is hard work, and juggling your own needs and the needs of your family, I remember that well. It’s great that your son wants to go to college, and I believe there will be a way for him to do that. My daughter, with her anxiety, etc, doesn’t want to go back. It’s so easy to fall into our fears for our kids. I could go crazy worrying about her. But I keep telling myself, and her, that she will work it out. So will we.

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    • Thanks so much for your encouraging words, JoAnna. Being a parent never changes, does it? From their first tummy aches to their fears and heartbreaks, we feel it all for them.

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  3. I feel you girl on the time dilemma. Don’t we all wish we could live in our little heads where we reside when we write, sometimes. 🙂 Good on you for your ambitions! 🙂

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  4. Pingback: My Article Read (7-2-2016) – My Daily Musing

  5. You’ve got it all lined up and quite admirably too. Sometimes, I just jump in and start from somewhere. All the best with July 🙂

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  6. Write the end first ( if you know it) – worked for me once, only once, but it’s worth a shot!

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  7. wishing you all the best and a clear head to make great decisions!

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  8. Maybe it’s like breaking through the barrier at Platform 9-3/4. Sometimes you need a running start. Maybe go backwards first to an earlier place in the writing and surge forward.

    Have you taken a campus tour of where your son would like to go? Maybe there are some support systems in place on campus that someone in administration could connect you to.

    I certainly wish you the best in all your endeavors. ❤

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  9. Tough questions about belonging, which I have no answers!

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  10. Sending you some clearing energy and a cup of something you like 🙂

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  11. I feel at that torn stage myself – where do I belong? How long do I have to wait? When is long, too long? I hope you and your son can work your way through what he needs to do to start his own journey towards belonging… Whether that’s to himself, and feeling comfortable with that, or to a community of study or work. Life is long and short at the same time…

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    • It’s a tough road to travel sometimes, isn’t it? As for my son, what I’m afraid of the most is that he turns inward and never leaves the house again. I need to get him involved in something. Anything.
      Thanks for your comment and your commiseration, Freya. 🙂

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