Life in progress


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#SoCS – Awkwardly

Verily, I say I really get myself into some messes. Like, I don’t think about what my own Saturday posts are going to look like. If you’re looking at this post and thinking, “Why the hell would I hire an editor who starts a sentence with an adverb … especially one like ‘verily,'” know that the prompt made me do it!

Yes, it’s my prompt.

I blame it on lack of coffee.

So, would you look at that! It’s Saturday already! The plan at this point is to take Alex to a movie today–either “The Kid Who Would Be King” or “A Dog’s Way Home.” I’m waiting for Alex to decide. I don’t particularly want to see either of them, but you do these sorts of things for your kids. Especially when they let you sleep in ’til 9:30. Aside from when they woke you up just to tell you they’re awake. It was still dark. I have no idea what time it was, but I told him to leave me alone and go downstairs, which he did.

Maybe he’ll sleep through the movie. I might too. We’ll have popcorn, so we’ll be sure to look “into it.”

At the moment I’m dying for my second cup of coffee. The dog is curled up in a ball on the loveseat beside me

and the kid is watching something that’s got him screaming and clapping. His laptop is turned the other way, so I don’t know what it is.

And me? I’m sitting here typing out whatever emerges from my under-caffeinated brain.

Awkwardly.

SoCS badge by Pamela, at https://achronicalofhope.com/

This thirsty post is brought to you by Stream of Consciousness Saturday. Click the link to find all the other awesome posts in the comment section, and join in! It’s fun! https://lindaghill.com/2019/02/08/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-feb-9-19/


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Cathartic – #JusJoJan 2019 Jot #27

I’ve spent most of the day contemplating, trying to figure out what I do that is cathartic. What helps me purge my negative emotions. And really, I could come up with nothing.

So my next question for myself was how am I coping? Why am I not going off the deep end?

And my answer was that I am generally happy. Content, despite all the stressors in my life. It’s testament to the fact that I don’t set the bar very high when I consider myself happy that my kids are alive and safe. Are they all healthy? Not by a long shot. Do they have everything they want? No. But they generally have a lot to smile about nonetheless.

There’s still all the stress to deal with, but that I do with my little escapes. Writing fiction, plunging headfirst into my editing jobs, taking a walk, and colouring easily help at least give me a break from my worries.

And I suppose when it’s all at its worst, my writing, even when I’m not writing about myself, can indirectly help me to spit out on a page what I’m feeling inside. We can’t, as writers, effectively express emotions we haven’t felt, whether they be joy or grief, well-being or pain.

On the other hand, maybe I’m just lying to myself and I’ll explode when I turn 60.

But at this very moment, I honestly believe I have it pretty good. All things considered.


The prompt word, “cathartic,” for today’s post is brought to you by Enthralling Journey! Thanks, Enthralling Journey! To find her “cathartic” post, click here. And say hi while you’re there!

It’s never too late to participate in Just Jot it January! Click the following link to find out how, and see all the other participants’ links in the comment section. It’s fun! https://lindaghill.com/2019/01/27/jusjojan-2019-daily-prompt-jan-27th/


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Balance – #JusJoJan 2019 Jot #25

It’s a hard thing to find, balance. I spend far too much time sitting on my butt, writing, editing, and canoodling on social media. Even the balance between time spent writing and promoting is a difficult one. But what I need more than anything is exercise.

So it’s nice when there are natural consequences that lead me to doing what I should be doing. Like today, for instance, I walked to the hospital to visit my mother. (I was able to go because Alex finally went to school! Yay!) It was a choice between a fifteen minute walk and fifteen minutes of shoveling my car out of the driveway. Yeah, the shoveling might have been better exercise, but I still had to walk fifteen minutes to get home as well. AND I saved $4.50 for parking.

My mother is doing a bit better, by the way. She looked better, though her breathing is still laboured. The doctor asked me if she’d ever been diagnosed with Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease (COPD), to which I replied no. But it’s not at all far-fetched that she has it, since she’s been smoking since she was 14 years old. Her 89th birthday is in three weeks. So once I get her home, it’s going to be a matter of explaining to her that if she doesn’t quit, she’s going to die. She won’t understand, and if she does understand, she won’t remember the conversation 45 seconds after we have it.

With dementia, it seems, there is no balance.

On a personal level, I put a lot of faith in balance. I’m a Taoist at heart. The yin yang symbol is all about balance. An equal amount of black and white/feminine and masculine.

Each is contained within the other.

I miss Tai Chi. Which is something that would help my mother. If I had time to get her out of the retirement home.

Most of my lack-of-balance issues come from being the one responsible for everyone else. Being a single mother and an only child in the sandwich generation ain’t easy.

Then there’s the balance between sobriety and drunkenness.

I think I need more wine tonight.


“Balance” is the prompt word for today, brought to us by JP. Thanks, JP! Click here to find her JusJoJan post for today. And say hi while you’re there!

 

It’s never too late to participate in Just Jot it January! Click the following link to find out how, and see all the other participants’ links in the comment section. It’s fun! https://lindaghill.com/2019/01/25/jusjojan-2019-daily-prompt-jan-25th/


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Curiosity – #JusJoJan 2019 Jot #22

Well, for a birthday, it’s been one unexpected thing after another. Let me tell you about it.

It started out with the school buses not running, but I knew that ahead of time. Because Alex was starting to go stir crazy yesterday, and because he had an appointment with a speech and language pathologist at lunch time at the school, I’d decided to drive him in anyway. So I began my day by shoveling my car out of the driveway. Turned out I didn’t need to do it first thing, because my best friend, John, came to my rescue and took Alex to school.

I still needed to be there for the appointment, however, so I had a shower–my birthday present to me–and drove to the school where I met the speech pathologist. Lo and behold, she’s fluent in sign language. Wonderful! What a lovely surprise that was!

After that, I came home and tried to get as caught up on my social media and all the kind birthday wishes, as well as try to promote my book sale. Then I had to drive back to the school to get Alex, because no buses.

I got home and we had pizza for dinner–no cooking!–and I got back to my laptop for some more catching up. Then my mother called to say she spent the day in bed, she was very sweaty, and the nurse had been talking about sending her to the hospital today. But my mum had no idea why. So I put in a call to the nurse at the retirement home. Apparently–wait for it–a few of the residents have had pneumonia, and my mother hasn’t been doing so well. They’ll keep an eye on her tonight, and if they have to send her by ambulance, they will. I explained I can’t get away–I have Alex to look after.

Just as I was putting Alex to bed, I got a call from his brother. His bus didn’t show up. So off I went to drive him to work for 11pm.

Meanwhile, we’re expecting freezing rain tomorrow, so probably no buses. And I doubt I’ll want to drive either. There’s about six inches of snow on my street, and if that freezes over, it’s going to be an ice rink out there.

What does all this have to do with curiosity?

I’m not the slightest bit curious about how my day tomorrow is going to go.

I’m happy and content to spend the rest of my birthday oblivious to what might await me.

Just livin’ in the moment.

Thank you so much to everyone for their wonderful birthday wishes today! They really helped me get through what was an otherwise trying day. And it’s entirely possible that they kept it from being worse! ❤


“Curiosity” is the prompt word for today, brought to us by Pamela. Thanks, Pamela! Click here to find her signature daily quip post for today. And say hi while you’re there!

 

It’s never too late to participate in Just Jot it January! Click the following link to find out how, and see all the other participants’ links in the comment section. It’s fun! https://lindaghill.com/2019/01/22/jusjojan-2019-daily-prompt-jan-22nd/


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Companionship – #JusJoJan Jot #18

It’s been a long day. My companion for the day was Alex–he didn’t go to school. His cough was bad enough this morning that I decided to wait and see if sitting up would help. It did, but then he slept most of the morning.

He lazed around for most of the rest of the day, only really getting up to build some Lego with my best friend, John.

He’s sleeping again now–the worry isn’t over.

I look forward to going back to this not being the only thing on my mind.


“Companionship” is the prompt word for today, brought to us by Di. Thanks, Di! Click here to find her JusJoJan post for today. And say hi while you’re there!

 

It’s never too late to participate in Just Jot it January! Click the following link to find out how, and see all the other participants’ links in the comment section. It’s fun! https://lindaghill.com/2019/01/18/jusjojan-2019-daily-prompt-jan-18th/

 


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Update – Alex is home!

He finally slept last night, and now that he’s off the IV antibiotics, they decided to release Alex from the hospital. He’s still coughing, but hopefully that’ll go away by the time the oral antibiotics are done this time.

Of course, as soon as he sat on the couch at home he fell asleep. I hope his nap doesn’t mean he’ll be up half the night.

In other news, he has an appointment with his cardiologist tomorrow. I’ll schedule the post requesting the prompt words for the rest of the month tomorrow afternoon when I think I’ll be home. In case I’m not, I’ll be counting on you to read the rules! Watch out for that at 1pm EST.


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Quick update on Alex

He’s still in hospital. He had two hours of sleep last night and one more hour when I arrived at the hospital this morning at 4:00am, because I made him lay down.

He’s still on his feet.

Total sleep since Sunday (01/13) morning: four hours. It is now Tuesday, 9:40pm.

Hoping he’ll come home tomorrow. It’s boring enough here to allow him to doze off.

Thanks to all who commented on my last post. I appreciate the good thoughts and prayers, more than you know.