Life in progress

Category Archives: Funny


by 26 Comments

JusJoJan24 the 2nd – Gregorian

I want to start this post by saying if Gregorian came from a guy named Gregory, there should be a Lindarian something or other.

This post is part of Just Jot it January, and the prompt is courtesy of Willow. Check out her blog here!

Things that were readily available when the Gregorian calendar (the one we use now) came about (in the late 1500s):

  1. Horses on every corner. Or at least on every corner that mattered.
  2. Fresh vegetables without steroids.
  3. Clean air. (Except where the horses were, then WHEW, how ’bout that smell?)
  4. Kids that weren’t glued to a screen most of the time.
  5. Lots of blacksmiths. Because horses.

Things that weren’t readily available when the Gregorian calendar came about:

  1. Horsepower. At least not the car kind.
  2. Milk in bags. Not in Ontario or Quebec, Canada? It’s a thing.
  3. Air that’s free of the scent of horse manure. (But what about those diesel engines? WHEW!)
  4. Computers that could tell you at any given point how many days to Christmas … I could actually do without that, thanks very much.
  5. Few blacksmiths, plenty of tire shops.

And that’s my Lindarian list.

This listy post is part of Just Jot it January! Want to join in? Just click here to get to the prompt and drop your link. It’s fun!

Thanks again to Willow for the prompt!


by 51 Comments

One-Liner Wednesday – A more honest version

I rewrote the words to “Let It Snow” to make it more accurate, for my circumstances at least.

Oh the weather outside is stressful

And the mall is just a cesspool

But since we still have to shop

Let it stop

Let it stop

Let it stop

Edit: Apologies to the late Sammy Cahn for twisting the words to his wonderful song … which was written in the middle of summer, apparently. Who knew?

If you would like to participate in this prompt, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a pingback, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post, and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, like Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a pingback from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Try to make it either funny or inspirational.

3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

4. Add our lovely badge to your post for extra exposure!

5. Have fun!

Badge by Laura @ riddlefromthemiddle.com

Available now! Click the image!


by 35 Comments

One-Liner Wednesday – Warning!

So what you’re saying is be careful you don’t slip on the floor when you finish rappelling down the wall. Have I got that right?

Photo: “Caution: Wet Floor” sign but the stick figure is wearing a hat and appears to be holding a rope that’s hanging from above it. The angle of the stick figure, which is normally shown as falling over, seems to be rappelling down from above.

If you would like to participate in this prompt, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a pingback, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post, and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, like Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a pingback from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Try to make it either funny or inspirational.

3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

4. Add our lovely badge to your post for extra exposure!

5. Have fun!

Badge by Laura @ riddlefromthemiddle.com

Available now! Click the image!


by 31 Comments

One-Liner Wednesday – A battle to the finish

I got up from my desk the other day because Winston was whining. He wanted something on the kitchen floor that the cat was laying on.

But Mom, he’s laying on my crumb!

Seriously. Look at those eyes.

Admit it. You’d be scared too.

But in the end, it was too hot to argue.

If you would like to participate in this prompt, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a pingback, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post, and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, like Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a pingback from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Try to make it either funny or inspirational.

3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

4. Add our lovely badge to your post for extra exposure!

5. Have fun!

Badge by Laura @ riddlefromthemiddle.com

The Magician’s Curse (2.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else (Amazon worldwide, Kobo, etc.)
The Magician’s Blood (3.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
The Magician’s Soul (3.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
“The Great Dagmaru” Complete Series (6.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
The Magician’s Sire (free with sign-up) here.


by 29 Comments

One-Liner Wednesday – A cruel joke

It’s a cruel joke when you’re old enough to impart wisdom, but too old to remember what it was when it’s time to impart it.

If you would like to participate in this prompt, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a pingback, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post, and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, like Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a pingback from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Try to make it either funny or inspirational.

3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

4. Add our lovely badge to your post for extra exposure!

5. Have fun!

Badge by Laura @ riddlefromthemiddle.com

The Magician’s Curse (2.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else (Amazon worldwide, Kobo, etc.)
The Magician’s Blood (3.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
The Magician’s Soul (3.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
“The Great Dagmaru” Complete Series (6.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
The Magician’s Sire (free with sign-up) here.


by 31 Comments

One-Liner Wednesday – Time flies

This took me way longer to make than I thought it would just to illustrate a quote.

Photo: A picture of an arrow with the word “Future,” a fruit fly on a piece of yellow fruit that may or may not be a banana, and a quote that reads: “Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.”
― Anthony G. Oettinger

If you would like to participate in this prompt, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a pingback, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post, and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, like Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a pingback from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Try to make it either funny or inspirational.

3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

4. Add our lovely badge to your post for extra exposure!

5. Have fun!

Badge by Laura @ riddlefromthemiddle.com

The Magician’s Curse (2.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else (Amazon worldwide, Kobo, etc.)
The Magician’s Blood (3.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
The Magician’s Soul (3.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
“The Great Dagmaru” Complete Series (6.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
The Magician’s Sire (free with sign-up) here.


by 31 Comments

One-Liner Wednesday – Glad I didn’t owe anything

Imagine what the interest would have been like after 1,838 years if the amount owing wasn’t $0!

Photo: A screenshot of a bill with a minimum payment of $0.00 due on January 14, 0185.

If you would like to participate in this prompt, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a pingback, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post, and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, like Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a pingback from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Try to make it either funny or inspirational.

3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

4. Add our lovely badge to your post for extra exposure!

5. Have fun!

Badge by Laura @ riddlefromthemiddle.com

The Magician’s Curse (2.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else (Amazon worldwide, Kobo, etc.)
The Magician’s Blood (3.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
The Magician’s Soul (3.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
“The Great Dagmaru” Complete Series (6.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
The Magician’s Sire (free with sign-up) here.


by 35 Comments

One-Liner Wednesday – Like one of your French girls…

Winston in his “Draw me like one of your French girls” pose.

Photo: My beagle-Basset hound laying on his back on the couch, giving me the eye … probably thinking Why are you holding your phone up instead of scratching my belly?

If you would like to participate in this prompt, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a pingback, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post, and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, like Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a pingback from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Try to make it either funny or inspirational.

3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

4. Add our lovely badge to your post for extra exposure!

5. Have fun!

Badge by Laura @ riddlefromthemiddle.com

The Magician’s Curse (2.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else (Amazon worldwide, Kobo, etc.)
The Magician’s Blood (3.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
The Magician’s Soul (3.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
“The Great Dagmaru” Complete Series (6.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
The Magician’s Sire (free with sign-up) here.


by 30 Comments

One-Liner Wednesday – What day is it anyway?

I’ve thought it was Wednesday all day today, and yet as I schedule this post I have to remember that yes, it’s Tuesday today and no, if I schedule it for 2am tomorrow it’s not going to show up on Tuesday …

I swear, some days are just extra AHHHHH! Hehehe!

If you would like to participate in this prompt, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a pingback, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post, and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, like Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a pingback from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Try to make it either funny or inspirational.

3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

4. Add our lovely badge to your post for extra exposure!

5. Have fun!

Badge by Laura @ riddlefromthemiddle.com

The Magician’s Curse (2.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else (Amazon worldwide, Kobo, etc.)
The Magician’s Blood (3.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
The Magician’s Soul (3.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
“The Great Dagmaru” Complete Series (6.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
The Magician’s Sire (free with sign-up) here.


by 41 Comments

One-Liner Wednesday – Oh look! It’s another prompt!

I’m just here to say I’ve still got Christmas chocolates.

*gloats in assorted Quality Street flavours*

If you would like to participate in this prompt, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a pingback, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post, and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, like Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a pingback from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Try to make it either funny or inspirational.

3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

4. Add our lovely badge to your post for extra exposure!

5. Have fun!

Badge by Laura @ riddlefromthemiddle.com

The Magician’s Curse (2.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else (Amazon worldwide, Kobo, etc.)
The Magician’s Blood (3.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
The Magician’s Soul (3.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
“The Great Dagmaru” Complete Series (6.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
The Magician’s Sire (free with sign-up) here.