Life in progress

Category Archives: Funny


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Adventures on my Paper Route – Spring is … bent

Well, the good news is my laptop didn’t get stolen. Right, I should probably start at the beginning.

Upon stepping out my front door this morning with my papers I was pleasantly surprised. Not only has it warmed up a few degrees, the sun was coming out and … YAY! so are the flowers at the front of my house. I went back inside to get my sunglasses and my camera and, newspaper bag over my shoulder, set my glasses down absentmindedly to take a few shots of the new spring blossoms.

Spring

Lovely, yes?

So, both satisfied and happy with myself I stood up and reached into my pocket to find my sunglasses. Not there. Feeling a little sick I looked around my feet. Noth…. what’s that under my foot?  Oh look!

Ouch

Bent sunglasses!

So, cussing along my way, I finished off my paper route, but not without stopping by one of my customers – a dry cleaning business where the TV is always on – to find out that we’re to expect 15cm of snow Thursday and another 10cm on Friday.  That’s a total accumulation of 10″ for my friends who haven’t caught up to the rest of the planet. You know who you are 😉

And then, to top it all off, I arrived home, put the key in the keyhole and…. locked the door. In my giddy glee I forgot to lock the house up.

The good news is… yeah. I have something to blog with.


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Adventures on my Paper Route: Why did the hen cross the road?

Chicken’s eye view

So there I was, standing on the curb, waiting as I do every day to cross one of my town’s main thoroughfares. It’s not a particularly wide road, nor is the speed limit fast, but it’s busy enough that I have to wait most days. Today there was only one car coming, or so I thought. I was poised. I made the decision to cross.

Now, you know when your body is ready to move and suddenly you realise that maybe you shouldn’t let it? I didn’t see the other car. It wasn’t that close behind the one I did see, but it was close enough to make me hesitate. What it did was make me twitch. I had to make a split second choice. Stay or go. But my body was already in motion — so I ran!

Obviously I made it across the road — I’m here to talk about it. Had I been younger it would have been a little thrill. Since, however I’m at my age it was an adrenaline rush I’m still recovering from.

So why did the hen cross the road?

To feel like a spring chicken 🙂


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Adventures of my Paper Route

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The squirrels have been busy

It happens while we sleep. The squirrels — the most talented of them at least — sculpt likenesses of themselves around the neighbourhood.  Here are two kissing. They will be the skinny ones that have no time for nut gathering, just in case you’re wondering which ones to look out for.


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My Opinion

In the spirit of the weekend, and in honour of a very special friend (you know who you are) here is an opera-singing bunny.

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You’ll either love it or it will keep you away from my scotch.