Life in progress

10 Random Whys

by 47 Comments

1. Why are people surprised when they get a groan instead of a laugh at the end of a joke? It’s called a PUNCHline after all.

2. Why can’t I kiss my own elbow?

3. Why are there so many fruit flies in the world when there’s nothing to eat them?

4. Why do the things that are so bad for us, taste so good?

5. Why must our faculties go to pot as we get older?

6. Why does a bottle of water cost more than the same amount of gasoline?

7. Why can’t we just all get along?

8. Why do we call flies flies, and yet there’s not a bug called a “walk”?

9. Why do men have such a hard time asking for directions?

10. Why are there not more hours in a day when we need them?

 

One point for every question you answer. Bonus points if you can come up with another “why” question for me to answer.

Aaand GO!

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Author: Linda G. Hill

There's a writer in here, clawing her way out.

47 thoughts on “10 Random Whys”

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  1. joey's avatar
    joeyfullystated
    September 29, 2014 at 6:36 pm

    I’m kind of a know-it-all, but tonight I am tired and I don’t want to play. I just want to sip this tea and read all the answers. It’s lovely. No points. Just smiles 🙂

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  2. earth2bella's avatar
    earth2bellas
    September 28, 2014 at 10:04 pm

    1. Why are people surprised when they get a groan instead of a laugh at the end of a joke? It’s called a PUNCHline after all.

    The ending is supposed to HIT em. Like a surprise. That’s the best way to get a natural “Ha!” out of em.
    2. Why can’t I kiss my own elbow?

    You can! Keep tryin. Make a video and put it on YouTube.
    3. Why are there so many fruit flies in the world when there’s nothing to eat them?

    To ruin any cake you might bake in the summer.
    4. Why do the things that are so bad for us, taste so good?

    It’s a conspiracy!
    5. Why must our faculties go to pot as we get older?

    I like Doobsters take on that one.
    6. Why does a bottle of water cost more than the same amount of gasoline?

    Another conspiracy!
    7. Why can’t we just all get along?

    And another! Newspapers and reality TV would become extinct. They can’t have that.
    8. Why do we call flies flies, and yet there’s not a bug called a “walk”?

    I shall start calling them all walk. You are right.
    9. Why do men have such a hard time asking for directions?

    They know. Why do you assume he needs them? I say enjoy the ride. You end up somewhere eventually.
    10. Why are there not more hours in a day when we need them?

    Maybe you don’t need them! That’s what I tend to go with.

    Is the color black all the colors put together or no color at all?

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    • Linda G. Hill's avatar
      LindaGHill
      September 29, 2014 at 1:02 pm

      1. Excellent! Just like the “oof” you get when you actually punch them in the gut.
      2. You’re teasing me, aren’t you… 😉
      3. I see you have problems with fruit flies too. They’re SO annoying. And they drink all my wine. …at least that’s what the teenager tells me.
      4. Fiendish candy!
      5. Me too!
      6. They’re out to get us!
      7. Who wants to read good news? It’s boring!
      8. 😀 Might be a bit confusing… is it an ant? No. Is it a spider? No. Is it a bed bug? NO! Ew! Is it a…
      9. Hahahaha! That you will.
      10. Right! Why work harder when you can put it off ’til tomorrow?

      Bonus: It must be no colour at all, because as hard as I tried, all my crayons together couldn’t make black. And believe me, I tried. I’m sure my lack of success scarred me for life.
      P.S. You lose points for not making it a “why” question. Just in case you had a plan for all those lovely, meaningless points.

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  3. willowdot21's avatar
    willowdot21
    September 28, 2014 at 6:59 pm

    1 just don’t know , 2 Because you are not meant too! 3 It is an evil plan to rename them hungers! 4 Another fiendish plot to confuse us! 5same as 4, 6same reason that ink for the computer printer costs even more, 7 Most people are just plain stupid, 8 no idea better things to worry about, 9 because they would rather get lost than appear not a full know it all man! plain stupid I’d say! 10 just another fiendish plan to foil us all. Extra question why does the sun set and the moon rise?

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    • Linda G. Hill's avatar
      LindaGHill
      September 29, 2014 at 12:45 pm

      1. ‘Tis a mystery.
      2. Says who? I like my elbow! 😉
      3. Ahhh!!!
      4. & 5. I’m getting paranoid… who are “they” anyway?
      6. Don’t get me started on printer ink *rolls eyes*
      7. Better than being complicatedly stupid I suppose. 😉
      8. You say that now – wait ’til a bug walks up to you carrying a cane. You’ll be wondering why it’s not called a “limp.” 😉
      9. It’s lost on me too. 😉
      10. Good point. I’m foiled most days.

      Bonus: For the same reason the sun rises and the moon sets: what goes up, must come down. 😀

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  4. TamrahJo's avatar
    TamrahJo
    September 28, 2014 at 3:42 pm

    1. Why are people surprised when they get a groan instead of a laugh at the end of a joke? It’s called a PUNCHline after all.
    Because most people think they are funny all the time and they rarely are – unless you count looks – ba-boom

    2. Why can’t I kiss my own elbow?
    Because Funny bones are for laughing and kisses are for boo-boos

    3. Why are there so many fruit flies in the world when there’s nothing to eat them?
    What?!? Your dog is a vegetarian? Who would have thunk it…..mine chases the flies and walks all over the house – her version of ‘fetch’

    4. Why do the things that are so bad for us, taste so good?
    We’re trained like Pavlov’s dogs….

    5. Why must our faculties go to pot as we get older?
    Who wants to be aware of how bad they hurt?

    6. Why does a bottle of water cost more than the same amount of gasoline?
    Because no one chooses to purchase the 97 cent gallon jugs of housebrand water and chug from the jug…or fill their own reusable bottles….

    7. Why can’t we just all get along?
    We can, but it would require too much introspection and effort to try to understand the other person’s perspective AND there are those who have no interest in trying to do so….

    8. Why do we call flies flies, and yet there’s not a bug called a “walk”?
    I’m stumped, best I can do is say we have hoppers, jumpers and crawlers – are there any bugs that walk like we do? 🙂

    9. Why do men have such a hard time asking for directions?
    Because to ask infers you might actually act on someone else’s advice and men are men only because they are hard-wired to protect and provide – to charge into the wilderness and conquer it by brute force alone – not because Oprah thought it a good idea…. (my own brand of female chauvinism) LOL

    10. Why are there not more hours in a day when we need them?
    There is always time as long as priorities are clear… (not that I’ve found this reality, but if you achieve this Zen, let me know the secret!)

    Bonus Question:
    Why do we yearn for a life of meaning when in reality the only meaning it has is what we decide to give it?

    Bonus Question #2: (yes, I did this on purpose):
    Why do people ‘take a dump’ instead of ‘leaving’ it – I’ve never seen anyone outside of a hospital actually take it…. 🙂

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    • Linda G. Hill's avatar
      LindaGHill
      September 29, 2014 at 12:25 pm

      1. Ouch! Point proven 😉
      2. You’re right – I can tickle my elbow!
      3. *buys a dog*
      4. *drools* Right again!
      5. Good point! Wow, you’re on a roll!
      6. So it’s just laziness then?
      7. There’s a lot to be said for empathy, eh?
      8. Why walk on two legs when you’ve got six or eight? In answer to your question, I don’t think so. 😛
      9. To conquer the clover leafs! (On and off ramps) Yes! That must be it!
      10. But… everything is a priority!!

      Bonus question 1: Why do we yearn for a life of meaning when in reality the only meaning it has is what we decide to give it?
      Because we’re REALLY confused.
      Bonus question 2: Why do people ‘take a dump’ instead of ‘leaving’ it – I’ve never seen anyone outside of a hospital actually take it….
      First of all, hahahaha! Second, because they’re actually “taking a moment.” Awfully polite. 😉
      You win extra points for being so right but you lose half of them for adding an extra bonus question: don’t worry though – you’re still ahead by two and a half points.

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  5. Yecheilyah's avatar
    ahouseofpoetry
    September 28, 2014 at 11:15 am

    Ok so one of yall stole mine on butterflies! lol, I have another one tho: “Why are safety pins called safety pins when they’re anything but safe?” #4. To test our level of discipline.

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  6. John W. Howell's avatar
    John W. Howell
    September 28, 2014 at 9:33 am

    The guys(women) who invented GPS and turn by turn directions have saved generations of men from ridicule (not to mention being hopelessly lost)

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  7. MishaBurnett's avatar
    MishaBurnett
    September 28, 2014 at 6:28 am

    Where are these men who have trouble asking for directions? I have known a lot of men in my life and never run across one who would hesitate to ask for directions. Most stereotypes have some basis in fact, but that one has always confused me.

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    • Linda G. Hill's avatar
      LindaGHill
      September 28, 2014 at 8:35 am

      Where are these men? Maybe you should ask for directions! Ba dum dum ch! 😀 (Joke courtesy of my son, Fred.)
      I’ve worked at (or owned) a few gas stations in my time and I can tell you that it’s a fact – if a man and a woman share a car, 8 times out of 10 the woman will ask for directions. This was, of course, before GPSs were a thing. Now I have no idea what gas station attendants are even for.

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  8. Lee-Anne's avatar
    Lee-Anne
    September 28, 2014 at 4:58 am

    1. We’d lose friends if we punched everyone (even though some jokes deserve it!)
    2. I have no desire to kiss my elbow (or my toes!)
    3. I think bats eat fruit flies, or here in Australia – flying foxes.
    4. It’s a bitter paradox isn’t it?
    5. There’s a kind of life symmetry in losing our faculties as we get older, reverting to babyhood really.
    6. Water is free in Australia -pretty good water. I feel bad that other countries have to buy water, it’s from the sky after all – should be free.
    7. I hear you…
    8. Doobster418 said it good!!
    9. I won’t elaborate on the grounds I might be sexist 😉
    10. Time is a human construct. Toss away the clock and we have all the time we need 🙂
    11. Why can’t I think of a witty and clever conundrum?

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    • Linda G. Hill's avatar
      LindaGHill
      September 28, 2014 at 8:24 am

      1. I’ve been punched for a few – lucky it’s not a KICK-IN-THE-SHINSline, eh?
      2. I used to be able to kiss my toes… ah, those were the days.
      3. Ha! I’ll keep the fruit flies in my kitchen, considering the alternative.
      4. Actually it’s a sweet/salty/wine-flavoured paradox. 😉
      5. So why is it so hard to find someone to take care of us when we get older? Babyhood was much easier in that aspect.
      6. I’m thinking more along the lines of spring water you can buy in the stores when it can just as easily come from a tap. Having said that, I have a spring in my basement, so my water is free too!
      7. Right?
      8. An extra half a point for you for agreeing with him!
      9. Chicken!! hehe
      10. *throws all my clocks in the garbage*
      11. I don’t know – it’s a conundrum!! 😀

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  9. Private's avatar
    Doobster418
    September 28, 2014 at 12:31 am

    1. Why are people surprised when they get a groan instead of a laugh at the end of a joke? It’s called a PUNCHline after all.
    Because some people just don’t get my sense of humor. In fact, most don’t. I seem to get a lot of groans.

    2. Why can’t I kiss my own elbow?
    Why would you want to kiss your own elbow? I don’t even like kissing someone else’s elbow. Eww.

    3. Why are there so many fruit flies in the world when there’s nothing to eat them?
    There are so many fruit flies in the world because there’s nothing to eat them. So they thrive. Duh!

    4. Why do the things that are so bad for us, taste so good?
    High fructose corn syrup.

    5. Why must our faculties go to pot as we get older?
    They don’t…if you go to pot when you get older. It’s legal in some states now.

    6. Why does a bottle of water cost more than the same amount of gasoline?
    Because you can’t drink gasoline.

    7. Why can’t we just all get along?
    Wait! What? You mean we all don’t get along?

    8. Why do we call flies flies, and yet there’s not a bug called a “walk”?
    Bugs that walk are called creepy crawling things.

    9. Why do men have such a hard time asking for directions?
    We always no where we are, which is wherever we are. So why ask?

    10. Why are there not more hours in a day when we need them?
    I think it has something to do with time.

    Bonus why question: Why are you asking all these “why” questions?

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    • Private's avatar
      Doobster418
      September 28, 2014 at 12:33 am

      Damn. I should have asked directions. We always **KNOW** where we are. Why did I say we always **NO** where we are. Sheesh!

      Liked by 2 people

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    • Linda G. Hill's avatar
      LindaGHill
      September 28, 2014 at 8:07 am

      1. Is that why you groan at my jokes?
      2. Elbows are lovely. But not crusty elbows. Crusty elbows are ew.
      3. That’s way too logical for a Sunday morning. You lose a point.
      4. There’s high fructose corn syrup in McDonald’s french fries?
      5. *moves to the U.S.*
      6. But you can get water virtually free out of a tap.
      7. Believe it or not, no.
      8. Far more descriptive. You can have that point back.
      9. That’s great unless you’re going somewhere. I’m assuming you stay still a lot…?
      10. But time is relative.
      Bonus question: Why are you asking all these “why” questions?
      Why not?
      😉

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  10. nearlywes's avatar
    nearlywes
    September 28, 2014 at 12:00 am

    I’m going to sound like an smartass, so forgive me, but I have some kind of idea for the last one though. The days and nights aren’t determined by time, seeing as it is a man made idea to make plotting down history easier. So forget about seconds, minutes, and hours. What really judges days and nights is the rotation of the earth, and in some cases where you live in the world. Some places on earth live in mostly night, and vise versa some places live mostly days. Not sure if this actually answered the question but they are fun facts. 😀

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  11. Elaine's avatar
    Elaine
    September 27, 2014 at 11:36 pm

    Oh how I wish I had the answers to those questions! I would be a rich woman! LOL I guess they are just some of life’s mysteries that we cannot solve. Why is a certain insect called a butterfly instead of a flutterby? its not made of butter and it is not a fly but it does flutter by!

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  12. insanitybytes22's avatar
    insanitybytes22
    September 27, 2014 at 11:33 pm

    LOL, well that first one sure made me groan 😉

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