Life in progress


#SoCS – In the Cards

The concept of fate is debatable. I’ve always kind of believed in it. Especially when it suited me the most.

When something good happens, it’s luck. When something bad happens, it was bound to be. Bound as in tied up, unable to escape fate with a bow on top.

Until, of course, something good proves to have mixed results.

Was I fated to meet my ex? Of course–we had three kids. They were fated to come into existence, to change other people’s lives in their path.

Yeah, totally a mixed bag of beliefs.

Then there are the literal “in the cards” cards. I used to play around with Tarot cards a lot. I have no idea where they went when I moved eight years ago. Or maybe it was nine now … No matter. I haven’t seen them in close to a decade.

I used to wonder if I was just reading what I wanted to read in them. I mean seriously, so much interpretation!

But then once in a while I’d have a really specific question in mind and there was no doubt they were talking to me.

Happened more with the Angel cards.

I know where they are.

I still get them out once in a while.

Do they predict the future or show me what’s “in the cards,” so to speak? Again, totally up for interpretation.

They say that things you don’t believe in, won’t come true. But maybe it’s all in our heads.

Or maybe we just choose not to see it.

SoCS badge by Pamela, at

This mystical post is brought to you by Stream of Consciousness Sunday Saturday. Click the following link to find all the posts in the comments, and join in!


What Type of Believer Are You?

There are different types of believers in this world. Those who are religious (or not) are usually the first to come to mind. Some believe devoutly in one political party over another, others are positive there are aliens hovering, just waiting for the right time to be taken to our leader (which may or may not have something to do with the example before). But none of these have anything to do with my ponderings, nor my question to you.

This morning, while I was preparing my son’s tube-feeding, I started thinking about the difference between people who believe in superstitions versus those who swear things that happen which are related to one another are mere coincidence. And then I thought about Murphy’s Law. You know, the one that goes something like, “Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong.” I then started to wonder if there’s any correlation between the pessimistic old Irishman and the half full/half empty glass.

Keeping in mind the fact that I was thinking all this at 5:30am, I’m sure you’ll bear with me through my semi-conclusions to this riot of contemplation. Right? Okay. Here we go.

If a person believes in Mr. Murphy’s doom and gloom prophesy, he (using male pronoun for no other reason than ease) is more likely to be superstitious. Why? Because it’s his only defense against a probable negative outcome. It follows then (or at least it did in the wee hours of this morning), that superstitious people are glass half-empty people. So, Murphy = superstition = pessimist.

Alternatively, if a person does not believe the infamous Mr. Murphy had a leg to stand on, then she (see above pronoun explanation) is more likely to believe that relatable happenings are coincidence. Why? Because why not. This happens, that happens, chances are if we do it right in the first place then it’ll be okay. You see where I’m going next… she is the glass half-full person. The coincidence believer. No Murphy = coincidence = optimist.

All cut and dry, right? It is until I take into account that I believe in some superstitions and most of the time our dear old Murphy AND I’m an optimistic glass half-full type. What to do with this confusing information… Hmm… Oh I know! Ask my wonderful friends in WordPress land! Where do you fit in to all of this gobbledigook?

To make it easier, I’ve created a poll.

Please answer it as best you can.

Further to the poll, I’d love to hear your thoughts on this. Am I way out to lunch? (Or breakfast, as the case may be.) Should I keep my 5:30am thoughts to myself? Let me know. And don’t forget to vote! This is science, people!



The Life of a Caregiver

Life is strange, isn’t it?

I have to wonder sometimes at its fairness – how some of us get to stay relatively healthy while we watch our loved-ones fall apart.

Some believe it’s all predestined: were those who are put into the role of caregiver always meant to be one? Were they somehow chosen? I’ve heard it said that people who have ended up caring for others may be challenged by a higher power… that they are, by divine intervention, simply the person for the job. Some are able to make their own choice to work in the service of those who are less fortunate, or who are sick, some have no choice other than the choice to run away.

I’m a great believer that everything happens for a reason, though not necessarily in a mystical sense. Good and bad must always have a balance. The weights tip back and forth but nothing is ever absolute. Therefore what weakens us or challenges us can also strengthen us. Positivity can be found in the worst imaginable scenario, if we look hard enough.

What I struggle with mostly is deciding whether being the healthy one is a blessing or a curse. At first glance you think those who are ill have it the worst – and they do. There is no questioning that. But. What of the caregiver, having to watch those he or she loves suffer so?

I suppose it all comes down to the old adage, life is what you make it. In the darkest times, light can be found. But for whom is it hardest to find?


EM is for Merciful

Merciful is how I strive to live my life. When I consider the synonyms: Compassionate, forgiving, generous, kind and sympathetic among others, it just makes sense to me to try to be these things.

I’m not a Christian of any particular kind. I’m not even sure I believe in God, though I’m not adverse to the idea that there is more than we can see in the universe that is plain to our mortal senses. I don’t believe in the concept of karma as it relates to an eye for an eye. I believe in existence. I believe that it’s something we all have, whether we’re of this race or that, whether we’re human, animal, insect or herb. We are all equal in the fact that we live – we, all of us, affect one another in at least some small way. I also believe that we have choices in this life in how we exist. The sick can be happy – the healthy miserable. We can make the best of what we have to deal with, no matter what it is. Or we can dwell on that which is not ideal.

But what can we do for each other? If we all strove to ease one another’s existence, how wonderful would the world be? Yes, there would still be challenges; existence cannot be free of pain. Sometimes a smile, a helping hand, or a compassionate ear for someone who needs to talk things out can make all the difference.

I don’t need a God to tell me these things. I don’t need a proscribed belief system at all. I just need to be and to recognize that so does everyone else. Equally.


What do you believe?

We humans have some weird beliefs. I’m not talking about religion, or any type of organized superstition, as such. Can superstition even be considered “organized”? Hmm… that may be another blog post.

What I’m contemplating are those little things I feel so strongly about that I make them part of my everyday life.  And I know I’m not alone in this, because I’ve talked to people about this before.

For instance, when I have a feeling something bad is going to happen, I don’t tell anyone, lest it come true. On the other hand, if I feel something good is going to happen, I don’t tell anyone lest it not come true. Such a contradiction, isn’t it?

Then there are those things that I really want to do, that are possibly against the odds, (such as successfully selling a million dollars’ worth of books) but I talk about it over and over because I think that maybe the universe will make it true. Again, a contradiction.

There are so many of these little beliefs that people, not only me, hold dear.  What comes around, goes around can be linked to both the Golden Rule and Karma, but there are people who just simply believe it. Another common belief is that certain sequences of coincidences are a sign of something to come.

And how about our superpowers? So many people have them. Ever since I was a little girl I’ve sometimes been overcome by the feeling that I was going to get caught doing something I shouldn’t, and I’ve learned to always trust it. For instance when I was a teenager, if I had a friend from school over who wasn’t allowed in the house, I knew precisely when to get them out the door, even if my mother showed up unexpectedly early. Now I apply it more to getting caught speeding… not that I do so often, but I always manage to slow down long before I come across a speed trap. And no, they’re never in the same place. I’ve met people who know when the phone is going to ring, and people who can predict changes coming in their lives, and of those who are close to them.

All of these things require a certain amount of belief to cause them to keep coming back to us.

Do you have any odd beliefs? Superpowers? Please share!



JusJoJan 29 – Shit Happens


When I came across this statement (above) on Facebook it made me think. And then it made me think some more.

My first reaction was to recognize that I say this all the time: Everything happens for a reason. And while I do believe somewhere deep inside that it does, I believe even more the two word statement, everything happens. The other saying I often use is, Shit happens and there’s nothing anybody can do about it, which is probably the more accurate of the two. I don’t say it often to anyone but myself however, since it’s not very consoling.

Saying everything happens for a reason is a way to make me feel like I’m in control of a situation I have no control over. By considering what happened, whatever it is, and going through everything that happened as a result can be comforting, especially if the results were in some way positive. And let’s face it – you can always find something positive in something awful if you look hard enough. While it may not make up for the bad thing that happened, it’s better than nothing.

I have to realize, in the end, that there are things that are beyond my control. Whether I look for the good in them or not, they happen. Am I lying to someone when I console them with the statement above? I don’t think so, not if I can help them to find a glimmer where there would otherwise be a lack of hope.

Whether or not everything happens for a reason, you can decide for yourself. But to me it seems that simply saying “Everything happens,” is freeing.  It takes the burden away of trying to control that which is out of my hands.

I’ll still look for silver linings, and I probably still won’t be telling people that shit happens and there’s nothing they can do about it. But I’ll be thinking it, now more than ever.


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