It was just a little electrical fire.

And, I mean, we spill water around the spout of the electric kettle ALL the time when we’re filling it up.

Only today it made this really weird noise just as it began to boil. A noise like “zztzztzztzzt.” So I looked at it (because I was standing there waiting for it to boil) and I said out loud to it, “What the fuck is that noise?” And then I saw it in the reflection on the stove. A yellow glow. And I thought, hey, you’re on fire! So I pulled out the plug and the fire stopped. But when I finally got brave enough to pick the kettle up, the puddle of water on the counter was burning. Yes, burning. Not boiling. Burning.

So I said to the kettle, “You’re toast!” and I put it away where no one else will use it. After I poured the water for my tea of course. Let’s not get too crazy. I’m not going to throw out perfectly good boiling water for the sake of a little fire.

I’m just glad I was standing there. Standing there to say, “Nope, you’re not burning down MY kitchen!”