Life in progress

Tag Archives: humour


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#SoCS – ‘Tis the season

Shopping. I hate it. So it’s no wonder this is my least favourite time of year. And it’s prolonged by the fact that my kids were born in September, October and November, my best friend in January and my mother in February.

Don’t get me wrong – I love the giving part. I just can’t stand having to decide what everyone else might want. And then there’s that other dreaded question – what would I like for Christmas or my birthday? (Which is in January, the day before my best friend’s.) Um… let’s see… a car? A new house? Just pay off my bills? Oh, okay. Socks will do. (No, seriously. I always need socks. Maybe I subconsciously named this whole prompt “SoCS” in order to give people hints on what to buy me for Christmas.)

I always leave my Christmas shopping to the last minute. My excuse is I don’t want to buy something and then the recipient gets it in the interim, and then I’ll have to take it back. AND come up with another idea. So I wait until everything I can think of has been bought by everyone who got their shopping done early and then I wander around aimlessly until, finally, I buy everyone a mug. Or socks. (Maybe in hopes that I’ll get them back? I don’t know…) The dog is NOT going to like his present this year if I can’t find anything better than socks. But I will take pictures before he eats them if that’s what he ends up with.

Alex wants to put the tree up this weekend. There’s another thing I dread. Untangling the lights and finding out which ones work, because I never manage to throw out the ones that don’t the year before. Hanging up all the old (some broken) ornaments from when the kids were small. Seriously, I’d like to throw a lot of them out and just keep the good ones. But the kids like them, so we end up with a tree that looks like the floor of a toddler’s room after they’ve trashed it. If the kids ever move out, I’ll buy all new decorations. Or decorate my tree with socks.

Ha! Who am I kidding. I’ll keep the lot of them and sob over them… even the broken ones.

socsbadge2016-17

This socky post was brought to you by SoCS, or Stream of Consciousness Saturday if you like. You can join in the fun, or just read more posts when you click here: https://lindaghill.com/2016/12/02/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-dec-316/


by 12 Comments

New Random Update

Redundancies. I’m studying them in my new-but-almost-finished Stylistic Editing course. I’ve decided to make the decision to get them all out of my system in this post I’m writing right now.

Edit: I’ve decided to edit all the redundancies from the remainder of this post because it’s been bothering me since I published it yesterday.

Sadly, James Justin, the scam artist nice man from Windows didn’t call me back. I had some great suggestions on what to say/do to him; you can read the hilarity in the comments here: https://lindaghill.com/2016/11/26/okay-i-need-your-help/ if you haven’t already. Since I told him my power was off when he called the first time, I was going to inform him that I never turn my computer off so I had no idea how to turn it on. This scenario is getting funnier by the day, since if he does call now, I can say, “THANK GOD YOU CALLED! I HAVEN’T HAD A COMPUTER SINCE SATURDAY!!” Of course it will take 15 minutes to boot, during which time I’ll have lots of opportunity to take advantage of the awesome suggestions on the other post. Then, after I go through all the steps he meticulously explains in order for him to hack my computer and steal all my money, I’ll ask, “What’s an ‘internet’?” Brilliant, no?

My One-Liner Wednesday today had more to do with real life than I wish it had. I was passing out last night when I should have been scheduling the post, then I woke up at 7:10 this morning – an hour and a half late – so I had to drive the kid to school before I could get around to the prompt. Needless to say, it’s been a rough one. However, this is a good opportunity to let you know that if I’m ever AWOL, you check my Twitter feed in the right-hand column, just over there —> somewhere. If possible, I’ll leave a note to let you know what’s happened to me.

I’m almost finished the final edit of my first book in the series, The Great Dagmaru. The actual title for Book 1 is yet to be determined. Book 2 is written and I’m three-quarters of the way through writing Book 3. Unfortunately my plan to get it published this year will not be met. I’m hoping to do so in February.

Between the craziness of the above and spending the day at the hospital in Kingston for a consultation, I’ve been shamefully negligent in responding to comments.  I hope to get back to you all soon!

 


by 33 Comments

Okay, I need your help

This has the potential to be fun. I just had a nice man call me from Microsoft. He introduced himself as “James,” a lovely East Indian name to be sure, to let me know my computer is sometimes “not responsive” because of a serious problem with Windows. James can fix it for me, but I have to be in front of my computer.

I explained to him that, unfortunately, I don’t have any electricity right now (a blatant lie) but he said that’s no problem, he can call me back later and we can fix this thing! He confirmed his name, “Justin,” and said he’d call tonight.

SO! How can I have the most fun with “James Justin” tonight? Suggestions, please!!


by 44 Comments

One-Liner Wednesday – …but wait!

There's still hope!!

There’s still hope!!

Someone really didn’t think this through.

 _____________________________________________________________________________

Anyone who would like to participate, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do,
you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a ping back, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post, and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, like Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a ping back from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Try to make it either funny or inspirational.

3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

4. Add our very cool badge to your post for extra exposure!

5. Have fun!

#1linerWeds badge by nearlywes.com

#1linerWeds badge by nearlywes.com


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One-Liner Wednesday – Umm… Run?

New blood donors needed! Fish and Game Club

New blood donors needed!
Fish and Game Club

I’m game! …wait, what happened to the old donors?!?

Note: I drove past this sign, turned around, parked as close as I could, and walked to it to take the picture. Some opportunities you just can’t pass up.

_____________________________________________________________________________

Anyone who would like to participate, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do,
you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a ping back, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post, and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, like Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a ping back from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Try to make it either funny or inspirational.

3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

4. Add our very cool badge to your post for extra exposure!

5. Have fun!


by 37 Comments

One-Liner Wednesday – Presidential Poop?

I was at Party City on the weekend to by a Hallowe’en costume for my son, when I came across a display of masks:

img_20161015_155355

Hillary Clinton – check.
Barack Obama – check.
Donald Trump – … Oh there he is, down by the happy face emoji. To the left or the right. You choose.

_____________________________________________________________________________

Anyone who would like to participate, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do,
you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a ping back, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post, and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, like Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a ping back from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Try to make it either funny or inspirational.

3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

4. Add our very cool badge to your post for extra exposure!

5. Have fun!

#1linerWeds badge by nearlywes.com

#1linerWeds badge by nearlywes.com


by 36 Comments

One-Liner Wednesday – I Thought We Were Roommates!

I got such a kick out of this, and it’s stayed with me so long, that I had to share it with all of you. You’re welcome.

_____________________________________________________________________________

Anyone who would like to participate, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do,
you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a ping back, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post, and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, like Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a ping back from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Try to make it either funny or inspirational.

3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

4. Add our very cool badge to your post for extra exposure!

5. Have fun!

#1linerWeds badge by nearlywes.com

#1linerWeds badge by nearlywes.com


by 32 Comments

One-Liner Wednesday – The Temptation of a Masochist

Blunt Hair Studio, Kingston

Blunt Hair Studio, Kingston

I was sorely tempted to go into Blunt Hair Studio last weekend, just to see if they’d say, “Holy shit, you went out in public looking like that? For God’s sake sit down and let us do something with your hair!”

_____________________________________________________________________________

Anyone who would like to participate, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do,
you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a ping back, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post, and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, like Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a ping back from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Try to make it either funny or inspirational.

3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

4. Add our very cool badge to your post for extra exposure!

5. Have fun!

#1linerWeds badge by nearlywes.com

#1linerWeds badge by nearlywes.com


by 2 Comments

Kingston WritersFest

It’s the time of year again for the Kingston Writer’s Festival! I bought tickets for seven events this year, one of which was last night at the Grand Theatre.

I had the pleasure to attend an interview with Annie Proulx, of Brokeback Mountain and The Shipping News fame, and Emma Donoghue, who, most famously so far, wrote both the novel and screenplay for Room. Both lovely ladies talked about and read from their newest releases, Barkskins, (Proulx) and The Wonder, (Donoghue), and I must say both books sound fascinating.

The best part of the evening, for me as an author, was when they talked about writing. I nodded my head when Ms. Donoghue said that if she were to describe where “home” is for her, it would be her laptop. Both authors agreed that when writing a novel, they live there inside it. It’s true for me as well. Emma also told a funny story about when she was writing Room, how she used her young son to figure out the logistics of escaping a rolled-up rug. I did the same, using my son to help me figure out the intricacies of a certain magic trick in “The Great Dagmaru.”

It was wonderful to be able to relate to two famous authors on a professional level – as professional as it can be to use your offspring as a prop, that is. And, of course, to be in the presence of greatness.

Most of the events I’ve signed up for to come are more for the sake of learning. A few are on the subject of writing non-fiction, in anticipation of putting together my memoir on parenting a Deaf child. I hope to update you all on how things are going throughout the weekend.


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One-Liner Wednesday – Wait, the fridge doesn’t have spell-check?!

Found upon waking one morning last week:

img_20160910_083643

My grocery shopping skillz are up to par: spicey KD (Kraft Dinner) is awesome.

It took me a long time to find fridge-magnet letters, now it looks like I need a red pen for drawing squiggly lines.

 

 _____________________________________________________________________________

Anyone who would like to participate, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do,
you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a ping back, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post, and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, like Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a ping back from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Try to make it either funny or inspirational.

3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

4. Add our very cool badge to your post for extra exposure!

5. Have fun!

#1linerWeds badge by nearlywes.com

#1linerWeds badge by nearlywes.com