Hi there. Iām Linda, and Iām an author. Itās been a long, straight road since I wrote my first novel during National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo) in 2004. That particular piece of *ahem* literature still hasnāt seen the light of day, mostly because of how much Iāve learned about writing since.
To back up a bit, my writing career began when I was four years old. I remember having one of my parents staple a stack of paper together so I could write a book. They encouraged me to just draw pictures, but I wasnāt having any of that. I wanted to tell a story. Unfortunately for them I could only spell the words āIā and ātheā at the time, so I bothered them unceasingly. Since then, Iāve been writing in my head if not on paper or the keyboard. I canāt not do it. Itās a part of me.
It’s a day to celebrate with one of our fellow bloggers! Guy, or Dale Cooper as he’s known here in Bloggieland, has just released his first novel, The Wrong Stuff!
Please click over to his site and wish him luck! š ā¤
My debut novel (that still seems like a weird thing to see written down) is published today and I am, not to put too fine a point on it, Very VERY EXCITED!!!
Yes, my accidental novel,The Wrong Stuff,a mystery thriller with a sci-fi twist and occasional flashes of black humour, is released today on Amazon in paperback (Kindle version to follow soon) and will also be available from Barnes and Noble in a couple of weeks.
Iād like to take this opportunity to thank a few people, for putting me on the road that lead me to this extraordinary and surreal point in my blogging journey:
The sickeningly talentedMr Darmon Richter, who inspired me to take up the hobby of thinking up stuff and writing it down in theā¦
My novelette, All Good Stories is on sale today! It’s a romantic comedy, complete with pirates, a parrot, and a Viking. What could possibly go wrong? Lighthearted and fun, it’s perfect to enjoy over a lunchtime or two. It’s available for the low cost of 99Ā¢, or the equivalent in whichever country you live, on both Amazon for Kindle here: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01JQWMQAE
The Kobo site has a preview of the book. I plan to figure out how to set one up on Amazon soon. In the meantime, here are the first two chapters:
Aarin, The Topless Pirate
Jupiter bounded into my book store with an extraordinary spring in her step.
āI finished it!” she proclaimed, beaming much like the ray of sunshine that fell upon the counter every fair morning at this time of year.
“Finished what?” I asked. As if I didn’t know. She’d spent months bemoaning the grueling process of editing her novel.
“Stop it, Xav.” Jupiter had a peculiar way of shortening my name when she was annoyed at me. Her eyes narrowed and her lip lifted crookedly at the ‘V’ as she elongated it. She was very cute when she did it, which made me want to annoy her all the more.
“Wait, let me guess. Your novel?” I teased.
“YES!”
I wished, not for the first time, as she bounced up and down in her spring jacket that we were more than just friends.
“Does that mean you’re finally going to share it with me?” Leaning forward on the counter, I rested my chin in my hand to affect nonchalance. Deep down, I was as excited as she was.
“Of course I’ll let you read it.” She dug through the suitcase she called a purse. After a moment, she pulled out a bound stack of papers. “Aarin, The Topless Pirate,” she announced as she plopped it down in front of me.
“Sounds promising.” I glanced at the title page, which stated only the title, then back to my best friend. “What’s it about?”
“It’s um… It’s about a pirate who goes to sea.”
“And is the pirate topless?” I sat up straight. Visions volleyed around in my mind of breasts bared to the slightly chilled ocean breeze.
She smiled wickedly. “You’ll have to read it to find out.”
I picked up the manuscript and slid it onto the shelf behind the counter. “I’ll read it later.”
She stared, wide-eyed. “You’re not serious.”
“It doesn’t sound that interesting. It can wait.”
“But…” She didn’t look as though she was going to cry, exactly, but the distress on her face was enough to make me waver.
“Sell it to me,” I said.
“What do you mean?”
“Make me want to read it. Tell me what itās about.”
“It’s about a pirate. A topless pirate. Who goes to sea.”
“…and?”
“And what? Isn’t that enough?”
“Is there sex? Is there a sunburn involved?”
“Fine! Don’t read it then.” She turned sharply and stalked out of the store.
Feeling bad about my little April Fool’s Day joke, I watched until she disappeared around the corner before I pulled the manuscript back out. I turned back the title page fully expecting to be properly titillated, only to find a photocopied picture of a crusty old pirate with his back facing the camera. He wore nothing but a three-cornered hat.
That we share the same sense of humor makes it no wonder Jupiter and I have been best friends since elementary school.
Bob The Blogger
Bob was a novelist. He was also a blogger. To round out the combo, to make it a trio (because Bob adored the number three), he referred to himself as a Serial Alliterator, which meant he loved alliterations. His blog profile sported a selfie of a previously pencil-thin Bob in the bathroom mirror, wearing nothing but a wicked grin. Though he stated in his profile that he loved the outdoors, since his foray into blogging he had seldom seen the sun. Secretly, he called himself Blob the Blogger.
Today, Bob is excited because yesterday he met Jupiter online. They met on Bobās blog after Bob blogged about writing a novel. He and Jupiter spent three hours commenting back and forth. Jupiter was single, and she was writing a novel as well.
Tomorrow, if he wasnāt too tired from using the treadmill, Bob planned to write Jupiter three poems. His poems would employ many uses of alliteration; they would contain the letter āJā as often as Bob could manage. They would not contain the first letter of Jupiterās best friendās name. As far as Bob was concerned, he needed no excuse to leave the letter āXā out of Jupiterās joyous poetry. No justification at all.
As a subtitle to this post, I should write, “And What Turns You Off?”
The reason I ask: I’ve been told by the experts that I should be “spamming” my friends on my blog, and on all other social media, in order to entice everyone to buy my new novelette, All Good Stories. I told the experts, but I don’t want to do that to my precious blogland friends! but the experts were insistent. “Choose between your friends and your success!” they said. Chanted, really. It was like a waking nightmare until I thought, why don’t I just ask my friends what they think?
So, friends, let’s start with what convinces you to hit that “Buy It Now” button when you’re considering the purchase of the book.
Initially, for me, the cover has a lot to do with it. We do, in fact, judge a book by its cover. The artwork has to be attractive AND hint at what might be inside. It has to make me ask questions. Like, why the parrot? But it’s not only the front! The back (or the blurb in the case of an ebook) is a crucial part of my decision. It not only has to make me want to read the book, it has to be free of errors and give me a hint, through its voice, of what I can expect on the inside.
Reviews and recommendations come next. Even if they’re not jumping off the page to say “This was the best thing ever!” there has to be some consistency to them. For example, “This made me laugh!” and “I chuckled when I read this!”
But then there are those authors who keep on and on and on. Some of us can ignore it, turning it into white noise. I especially tend to disregard an ad if I’ve already bought the All Good Stories book. Then again, seeing “Buy it today!” or “Pre-order now, only 99 cents!” really seems to get under other people’s skin. There has to be a balance! Am I right?
What do you think? What’s most important to you? And would you spend .99Ā¢ to shut me up? (Please see the link at the top right-hand corner of this page.) š
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