Linda G. Hill

Life in progress


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172. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Monday, February 19th, 8:00am
Michael (and DeeDee)

 

Michael sits at the window, reading. DeeDee takes the seat beside him.

DeeDee: (clears throat) Excuse me, sir?

Michael: I’m reading.

DeeDee: (shifts nervously in the seat) I’d like to interrupt you, if I may.

Michael: (looks up for the first time and does a double take) What for?

DeeDee: I’m sorry, but I’d like to ask you to help me. I’m doing a project for college, and I need to interview someone on the bus.

Michael: (smiles and closes his book on his lap) I’d be pleased to help out.

DeeDee: (exhales deeply) Thank you!

Michael observes her as she bends to pull a notepad out of her back pack.

DeeDee: (holds up finger) I’m almost ready.

Michael: Take your time.

DeeDee: Here we go. (straightens and holds a banana up to her mouth) First question: What would you say is the strangest thing you’ve ever seen on the bus? (moves the banana in Michael’s direction)

Michael: (hesitates) You’re … joking, right?

DeeDee: (brings the banana back) About what? (moves the banana out)

Michael: You’re interviewing me with a banana.

DeeDee: (brings the banana back) No I’m not. (holds up notepad) It’s a notepad.

Michael shakes his head and goes back to reading.

 

Next stop: Tuesday, February 20th, 4:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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171. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Sunday, February 18th, 11:00am
MoJo and JoJo

 

MoJo: I tell ya, man, I’m really getting sick of winter.

JoJo: Me too, man. You betcha.

MoJo: We should seriously get a plane outta here.

JoJo: We should! Def!

MoJo: Where should we go?

JoJo: As far south as we can possibly get, man.

MoJo: Def.

JoJo: Like, the south pole, man.

MoJo: Whoa. Really? We can do that?

JoJo: Why not? I’ll get right on it. Soon as we get home!

MoJo: Cool, man! Let’s do it!

They high five each other.

JoJo: South pole, here we come!

MoJo: Book it!

 

Next stop: Monday, February 19th, 8:00am

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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170. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Saturday, February 17th, 8:00pm
Edward and Lily

 

Edward: … so she threatened me with a stake.

Lily: No way!

Edward: Yes way!

Lily: I think we should get her before she gets us. She’s clearly dangerous.

Edward: What do you mean, “get her”?

Lily: You know, get her. Take her down. Down to the ground. Down INTO the ground, if you know what I mean.

Edward: No.

Lily: What do you mean, “no”?

Edward: You’ve got to stay away from her.

Lily: If you think I’m just going to sit by and wait for her to come along with a wooden stake, and…

Edward: I’ll take care of her. I’ll drain her and make her one of us. That’s what I’ll do.

Lily: But … I don’t want there to be another girl vampire. You’ve got me.

Edward: So?

Lily: So, you’ve got me!

Edward: You’re being irrational.

Lily: I’m being irrational? Edward, this girl might have friends. Next thing you know, they’ll be coming after us with torches and pitchforks!

Edward: You’re just jealous.

Lily: I’m … what? Me? Jealous? No way.

Edward: Yes way.

Lily:  (turns away, mumbling) You’re insane.

 

Next stop: Sunday, February 18th, 11:00am

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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169. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Friday, February 16th, 6:00pm
Clint (and Anna)

 

Clint sits at the window. Anna takes the seat beside him.

Anna: Bus is busy today.

Clint: (drawing himself up straight) This ain’t busy.

Anna: It’s not?

Clint: Li’l missy, I seen busy buses, and this bus ain’t busy.

Anna: Huh.

Clint: Yep. I bin up an’ down this country on buses. I bin west to east an back ag’in. I bin …

Anna: … ridin’ the steel horse?

Clint: (lowers brow and stares into her eyes) You’re a li’l smarty pants, ain’t you missy.

Anna: Who me? Nah.

Clint adjusts himself and stares out the window into the distance.

 

Next stop: Saturday, February 17th, 8:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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168. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Note: Strong language

Thursday, February 15th, 6:00pm
Andrea (and Lacey)

 

Andrea sits at the window. Lacey takes the seat beside her.

Andrea: Oh. My. God. Lace, you won’t believe what happened.

Lacey: Lay it on me.

Andrea: You know that guy, right? That, like, Edward guy?

Lacey: The one you’re …

Andrea: The one I’m in love with, right. Anyway, I saw him on yesterday. Right here on the bus. Can you believe it? And so we’re making a date with it being, like, Valentine’s, and everything is going great, and then, get this: I mentioned going out for a steak and he took off!

Lacey: No!

Andrea: He jumped right … out … the fuckin’ … window!

Lacey: No. Way.

Andrea: WAY! Can you imagine? He’s, like, so scared of me now, that he jumps out the window of a moving bus!

Lacey: It was moving?

Andrea: YES! You’d think a vampire would be able to handle a little steak, so, like, it’s gotta be me.

Lacey: Wait, what kind of stake?

Andrea: (eyes wide) NO!

 

Next stop: Friday, February 16th, 6:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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163. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Saturday, February 10th, 5:00pm
Misery and Gay

 

Gay: So whatcha doin’ tomorrow?

Misery: I don’t know. Sleepin’ I guess.

Gay: We should go out! Soak up some sunshine!

Misery: It’s supposed to snow.

Gay: Then we can go shopping! For boots!

Misery: I don’t have any money.

Gay: I’ll buy you some!

Misery: I take a size 18. (slides foot out from the seat in front) My shoes cost hundreds of dollars.

Gay: Then how about some new underwear? Nothing better than a new pair of panties!

Misery: Had a thong once. I lost it.

Gay: (frowns) You lost it? Wha … OH!

Misery smiles.

 

Next stop: Sunday, February 11th, 1:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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159. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Tuesday, February 6th, 3:00 2:00pm
Maurice and Stuart

 

(Stuart sits at the window. Maurice takes the seat beside him.)

Maurice: Hey! You’re early for once.

Stuart: Yep. Gotta go buy a new rug before work.

Maurice: Cat peed on it one too many times?

Stuart: Nope. Dog bled all over it.

Maurice: You’ve got a dog now?

Stuart: Not only that. You remember the old lady whose dog I accidentally killed?

Maurice: The one whose next dog ran away, and who’s deathly allergic to cats?

Stuart: That’s right. She’s living with me now too.

Maurice: But … why? And how is she living with you if you’ve got a cat?

Stuart: As for why, she spent so long in the hospital that she missed paying her rent and got kicked out. So I offered to take her in.

Maurice: And the cat?

Stuart: Shaved it.

Maurice: The cat mustn’t have enjoyed that.

Stuart: Nope. It looks like a giant bald squirrel.

Maurice: So what happened to the dog? You said it bled all over your rug.

Stuart: Well yeah. The dog took one look at the cat after we shaved it and thought it was a squirrel. Dog tried to eat the cat, cat scratched the dog.

Maurice: Wow. That must have been one hell of a scratch to make the dog bleed like that.

Stuart: Well, yeah. Because we shaved the dog too.

Maurice: The old lady’s not allergic to dogs though. She had one before.

Stuart: Nope. I am.

Maurice: The two of you are a match made in heaven.

 

Next stop: Wednesday, February 7th, 7:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.