Life in progress

Tag Archives: Humor


by 42 Comments

One-Liner Wednesday & #JusJoJan the 11th, 2023 – A squirrel!

I just wrote in my planner “Got distracted by Facebook/went to the pantry for nuts,” and now I’m convinced I’m actually a squirrel.

Picture courtesy of Canva

Photo: Cute red squirrel with a white belly and a fluffy black tail eating a peanut in its shell.

If you would like to participate in this prompt, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure.

Here are the simple JusJoJan Rules:

1. Just Jot It January starts January 1st, but it’s never too late to join in! Here, we run on the honour system; the “jot it” part of JusJoJan means that anything you jot down, anywhere (it doesn’t have to be a post, it can even be a grocery list), counts as a “jot.” If it makes it to your blog that day, great! If it waits a week to get from a sticky note to your screen, no problem!

2. I’ll post prompts at 2am my time (GMT -5). The prompt will be the word in quotation marks in the title of my 2am post. You don’t have to follow the prompt every day, but that will be where you leave your link for others to see. You’ll get a prompt for every day except Wednesday, when the prompt is simply my One-Liner Wednesday and on Saturday, when your prompt will be the Friday Reminder and Prompt for #SoCS, which will appear at about 9:30am Friday. Each prompt post will include the rules.

2 a) The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Try to make it either funny or inspirational.

3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

4. Add our lovely badge to your post for extra exposure!

5. Have fun!

Badge by Laura @ riddlefromthemiddle.com

3. Please ping back or link to the daily prompt. To ping back, just copy the URL from the daily prompt post, and paste it anywhere in your post. Check to make sure your link shows up where you want it to, and go back occasionally to see other bloggers’ entries – the more you visit others, the more they’ll visit you! Note: A) The newest pingbacks will be at the top of the comments section. B) Ping backs only work if you’re blogging on WordPress. Everyone else must paste a link manually.

4. Tag your post JusJoJan and/or #JusJoJan.

5. Write anything! Any length will do! It can even be a photo or a drawing – you’re going to title it, right? There’s your jot!

6. If your post is NSFW, do not ping back. Please leave your link in the comments with a warning.

7. If you’d like to, use the JusJoJan badge so that others can find your post more easily.


by 22 Comments

Skinnier than …

Funny story.

I was talking to my son Chris this morning about a dream he had of elephants.

As we were chatting, Winston, our dog, came into the kitchen to say hello to me.

I bent to pat him and asked him if he was an elephant.

“You’ve got four legs, and a tail, and floppy ears, and a long nose,” I told him. “But you can’t be an elephant. You’ve got a furry body.”

To which Chris replied, “Elephants are skinnier.”

“Skinnier than Winston? I’ve never seen an elephant skinnier than Winston,” I said.

“No, Mom, not skinnier. SKINnier. They have more skin!”

So I’m hereby declaring myself skinnier than an Irish Setter.

And no one is going to convince me otherwise!


by 32 Comments

#JusJoJan the 1st/23 – One resolution

I have one resolution for 2023 and that’s to organize my numerous goals.

Now, I’m sure you’re like, what the heck, Linda? Isn’t having goals just a subset of having resolutions?

Nuh-uh. It’s better than that.

I’ve spent the better part of the last year failing at most of the things I wanted to accomplish on a personal level. My freelance editing business is going very well, and I always manage to get projects done on time, if not early. But the stuff I wanted to do that isn’t on a deadline, i.e. writing my own books? Not so much.

So rather than resolving to write and publish, say, two or three of my own creations this year, I’m going more granular, by organizing my time so I can see what I can reasonably get done in the space of 365 days.

It’s easy to think “I’ll just scroll through Facebook and get to work on my own novel—the one no one is holding me accountable for—later.” But then five minutes on Facebook turns into hours and then I think “It’s okay, I’ll do it tomorrow!”

It’s the rinse and repeat that never ends.

Unless I organize myself.

So yeah, that’s my resolution. Set timers, work when I know I’ll have a chance, organize my time, figure out how long each step takes, and rinse and repeat that instead.

Sounds like a solid plan, right?

I’ll let you know how it goes.

P.S. I looked through my resolutions/bucket lists from past years and there’s one item I’m still striving for. In 2016 I said I wanted to spend a weekend alone in my home. Since then, I don’t think I’ve even had an hour alone. I’ll get there, though. Watch out for the boot, kids! 😉

***

This determined and mildly threatening post is brought to you by Just Jot it January! Click the following link to see how you, too, can join in! https://lindaghill.com/2023/01/01/daily-prompt-jusjojan-the-1st-2023/ It’s fun!


by 30 Comments

#SoCS – If I knew the new thing

Oh hey! Look! It’s me writing a SoCS post!

Who could have guessed that would ever happen again?

Really, I’m just here to complain like an old lady.

About all the newfangled thingymajigs these days—why are there so many?

But no, really. Why can’t things stay the same? Sure, you say, you’ll get used to the way things are now.

But I knew the old way. I was familiar with it. And it wasn’t broke, so why fix it?

Like the new WordPress blocks. I don’t know about you, but I always choose the classic blocks.

I don’t like my paragraphs split up every time I want a new one, thank you very much!

*sigh* It takes so long to learn these new unnecessary things. I have plenty to learn of my own choosing, though! I don’t have time for your crap!

Get off my lawn!

This ranty-type post was brought to you by Stream of Consciousness Saturday. Click the following link and join in! It’s fun! https://lindaghill.com/2022/12/30/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-dec-31-2022/


by 27 Comments

One-Liner Wednesday – Ha!

Photo: Origami birds in pastel shades. Text reads: Do you know if the Origami Society is still in business? I heard they folded.

If you would like to participate in this prompt, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a pingback, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post, and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, like Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a pingback from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Try to make it either funny or inspirational.

3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

4. Add our lovely badge to your post for extra exposure!

5. Have fun!

Badge by Laura @ riddlefromthemiddle.com

The Magician’s Curse (2.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else (Amazon worldwide, Kobo, etc.)
The Magician’s Blood (3.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
The Magician’s Soul (3.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
“The Great Dagmaru” Complete Series (6.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
The Magician’s Sire (free with sign-up) here.


by 39 Comments

One-Liner Wednesday – A McPizza?

Hi. Yeah, I’ll take a pizza? Make it McCrispy.


Photo: A car with a Domino’s Pizza sign on top ahead of me in the McDonald’s drivethru. Not something you see every day.

If you would like to participate in this prompt, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a pingback, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post, and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, like Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a pingback from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Try to make it either funny or inspirational.

3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

4. Add our lovely badge to your post for extra exposure!

5. Have fun!

Badge by Laura @ riddlefromthemiddle.com

The Magician’s Curse (2.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else (Amazon worldwide, Kobo, etc.)
The Magician’s Blood (3.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
The Magician’s Soul (3.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
“The Great Dagmaru” Complete Series (6.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
The Magician’s Sire (free with sign-up) here.


by 31 Comments

One-Liner Wednesday – He was a fun guy

He was a fungi until I ate him.

Photo: Four mushrooms straight out of the package. As I washed them I realized two of them had scars that looked like happy faces.

If you would like to participate in this prompt, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a pingback, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post, and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, like Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a pingback from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Try to make it either funny or inspirational.

3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

4. Add our lovely badge to your post for extra exposure!

5. Have fun!

Badge by Laura @ riddlefromthemiddle.com

The Magician’s Curse (2.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else (Amazon worldwide, Kobo, etc.)
The Magician’s Blood (3.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
The Magician’s Soul (3.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
“The Great Dagmaru” Complete Series (6.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
The Magician’s Sire (free with sign-up) here.


by 50 Comments

One-Liner Wednesday – Sorry

I’ve done it. I’ve found the most Canadian sign ever.

Photo: A sign in a convenience store window that reads:

We do not accept any type of credit. Sorry. Cash or debit only.

We do not accept

— Bra Money

— Panty Money

— Sock/shoe money

If it doesn’t come from a purse, a wallet or a pocket, we will not accept it! For health reasons. Sorry for any inconvenience.

If you would like to participate in this prompt, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a pingback, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post, and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, like Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a pingback from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Try to make it either funny or inspirational.

3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

4. Add our lovely badge to your post for extra exposure!

5. Have fun!

Badge by Laura @ riddlefromthemiddle.com

The Magician’s Curse (2.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else (Amazon worldwide, Kobo, etc.)
The Magician’s Blood (3.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
The Magician’s Soul (3.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
“The Great Dagmaru” Complete Series (6.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
The Magician’s Sire (free with sign-up) here.


by 31 Comments

One-Liner Wednesday – Not to make light of a serious situation …

…but don’t you think this has a sort of “What did I tell you three hours ago, mister?” vibe to it?

Photo: News article entitled “Caution advised with burning outdoors (Prince Edward County)” followed three hours later with an article entitled “Suspicious fires in Price Edward County.”

If you would like to participate in this prompt, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a pingback, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post, and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, like Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a pingback from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Try to make it either funny or inspirational.

3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

4. Add our lovely badge to your post for extra exposure!

5. Have fun!

Badge by Laura @ riddlefromthemiddle.com

The Magician’s Curse (.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else (Amazon worldwide, Kobo, etc.)
The Magician’s Blood (3.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
The Magician’s Soul (3.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
“The Great Dagmaru” Complete Series (6.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
The Magician’s Sire (free with sign-up) here.


by 41 Comments

One-Liner Wednesday – Chilly

We had a bit of a cold snap on Monday.

If you would like to participate in this prompt, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a pingback, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post, and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, like Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a pingback from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Try to make it either funny or inspirational.

3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

4. Add our lovely badge to your post for extra exposure!

5. Have fun!

Badge by Laura @ riddlefromthemiddle.com

The Magician’s Curse (.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else (Amazon worldwide, Kobo, etc.)
The Magician’s Blood (3.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
The Magician’s Soul (3.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
“The Great Dagmaru” Complete Series (6.99) on Amazon US and everywhere else
The Magician’s Sire (free with sign-up) here.