Life in progress

Tag Archives: humour


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NanoPoblano Day 2 – Gotta go!!

Today’s Japanese lesson involves something that affects all of humankind. Nay, all animated being-kind. It is a need unsurpassed since the dawn of time. No, not coffee. Though coffee is essential! Don’t get me wrong.

No, this requirement outweighs all other requirements.  From mere brewing to utter urgency, it is a force to be reckoned with. It is… the need to go to the toilet. And it is a must to learn in any language native to where you’re traveling. So let us consider the phrase in Japanese, “Where is the washroom?”

Say it with me:

O-tearai wa, doko desu ka?

Directly translated it means, “The toilet, where is it?” As you can see, the word for toilet has a lot of vowels in it. In Japanese, we pronounce each one individually. So, “O” always sounds like an O in the alphabet; “te” has a soft “e” sound, as does “a,” and “i” always sounds like “ee.” I give you: O-te-a-ra-ee. Try it. Try it again. Now imagine you’re bursting at the seams and try it again. It makes the rest; “do-ko dess ka” seem like a leisurely stroll in the park, doesn’t it?

Conclusion – cross your legs and eyes and whine. Someone will point you in the right direction. It’s a human thing, after all.

 

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This post has been part of Nano Poblano, found here: https://rarasaur.wordpress.com/nanopoblano-2015/#comment-53592 You can also type “Nanopoblano” into the search tabs in your reader to read more entries.


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One-Liner Wednesday – It’s a faux pas

Ha!

From Q107 Toronto on Facebook

From Q107 Toronto on Facebook

“I hate when people think they can just waltz into my room when what I’m listening to is clearly in 4/4.”

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Anyone who would like to try it out, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a ping back, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a ping back from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Make it either funny or inspirational.

3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

4. Have fun!


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Under the Category of…

…things one thinks about at one in the morning after a couple of glasses of wine…

Something the people who have met me in person know that most of you cannot is that I have a slight English accent. I acquired it from my parents, even though I was born and raised in Canada. I used to say I was born with an accent – I was teased relentlessly as a child for it. Most of it has disappeared but…

I was talking to myself at one this morning after a couple of glasses of wine (did I mention that?) and I said to myself, I wonder if I think in Canadian or English? And then I got to thinking.

What accent do we think in? Do we think how we speak? Or is there a language of thought?

In the immortal word of Bill and Ted on their excellent adventure, Whoa!!

bill_ted_whoa


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A Directional Nightmare

This is my excuse for not getting anything done today: I had all my hotel bookings set for my trip to Japan – had some fantastic places to stay. I’m not sure why I didn’t think of this when I booked them (or in particular, the one I had booked for the nights of the concerts), but I thought I’d check the directions today to see how I’d get from the concert venue back “home.” I planned to do it on foot so I stayed fairly close, just like I did last time. After all, the trip will be made alone in the dark. With that in mind… hahaha… here are my directions from Google:

ＮＨＫホール
Japan, 〒150-0041 東京都渋谷区 神南２丁目２−１
Head northeast
400 m
Take the crosswalk
24 m
Take the crosswalk
100 m
Take the crosswalk
66 m
Take the crosswalk
110 m
Take the crosswalk
47 m
Turn right
55 m
Slight right
18 m
Cross the road
33 m
Cross the road
40 m
Cross the road
18 m
Take the crosswalk
12 m
Cross the road
19 m
Cross the road
40 m
Cross the road
47 m
Turn left
22 m
Take the crosswalk
130 m
Cross the road
55 m
Take the crosswalk
120 m
Cross the road
52 m
Take the crosswalk
33 m
Take the crosswalk
100 m
Cross the road
25 m
Cross the road
38 m
Cross the road
110 m
Take the crosswalk
50 m
Cross the road
68 m
Take the crosswalk
38 m
Take the crosswalk
36 m
Turn right
110 m
Take the crosswalk
63 m
4 Chome-5-9 Aobadai

It’s THAT EASY!!! I shit you not, that’s all I get for directions. Because as I explained in this post, there is no such thing as a street name in Tokyo. Needless to say, I canceled that booking and made another one closer to the train station, from whence I can get a bus. Or at the very least, since it’s the closest station to the venue, someone has to know how to get there. In fact, I’ll follow the crowd. It’s in Shibuya, arguably the busiest part of the city.

So this is where I’m staying now – a gorgeous hotel three minutes’ walk from the famous Shibuya intersection, for a measly $140 Cdn. per night, breakfast included. Can’t beat that.

Not too bad an excuse for getting nothing done today, eh?


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One-Liner Wednesday – I’m driving here!

Last night, as I was driving down the main laneway in a parking lot, an entire family stepped out in front of me. I stopped rather close to them by necessity and the woman yelled at me through my open window, “We’ve got kids here, you could wait your turn!” I hmphed and drove away. When I got home, my adult son told me I should have retorted, “I’ve got a car here, you could wait yours!”

From now on I’m not leaving home without my 21 year old son. I’m sure he’ll be pleased with that arrangement.

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Anyone who would like to try it out, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a ping back, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a ping back from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Make it either funny or inspirational.

3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

4. Have fun!


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Envy me if you must…

This is the sort of thing I wake up to in the morning:

Minion stuck in a roll of paper towel

Minion stuck in a roll of paper towel

It’s a hard life.

Happy Thanksgiving to all my Canadian friends!


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Creepy or Convenient? Part 2

Google is at it again, reading my gmail. You might remember the first time, when Google noticed I had written the word “attached” in the body of my email but I hadn’t attached anything. This time it waited until the right time to pounce.

I received a notification yesterday to let me know the good people (computers?) at their organization had added the flight information for my upcoming trip to Tokyo to my Google calendar. So I won’t forget I’m going, I suppose.

So I have decided: If I receive an email suggesting that I drink less before I go to bed so I won’t have to get up to go to the bathroom at 1:37 am, 3:03 am, and 4:26 am again the next night, I’m going offline permanently.


by 41 Comments

One-Liner Wednesday – Tastes like Steve!

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Butter Lovers Flavour Popcorn! Taste varies from person to person.

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Anyone who would like to try it out, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a ping back, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a ping back from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Make it either funny or inspirational.

3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

4. Have fun!


by 38 Comments

Who Needs Glue When You Can Sniff Fruit Flies?

I’m completely and utterly discouraged tonight.

I had a weekend off but had very little sleep, but that’s not why I’m discouraged.

I got barely any work done on my novels, but that’s not why either.

I have a sink full of dishes that I haven’t the energy to do, but that’s not entirely what’s got me down.

I killed a fruit fly this afternoon by breathing it forcefully (by accident) up my nose and blowing it back out into a kleenex – that was actually the highlight of my day.

I want to go to bed but I have to wait for kids to go to sleep, but that’s not what’s really killing me.

I have so much to do that I don’t know where to start, but that’s not the worst of it.

What really has me discouraged? It’s all of the above combined. Except the fruit fly thing. That’s just funny.

How was your weekend? Please tell me it was better than mine.


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One-Liner Wednesday – Because seriously, no one wants to be around me

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You know you’ve finally made it to the party of life when you get insulted by a fortune cookie. Thanks, Confucius.

 

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Anyone who would like to try it out, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a ping back, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a ping back from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Make it either funny or inspirational.

3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds!

4. Have fun!