Life in progress

Tag Archives: Humor


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Just Jot It Jan 30 – History

Everyone knows the saying, Those who forget history are doomed to repeat it (not necessarily the exact quote – it’s too late at night to look it up).  When we hear it, it’s usually said in the context of the history of the world. Things like when Germany voted in Hitler… that sort of stuff.

But it’s true on a much smaller scale. We get it every time we learn something by experience. From falling in love with the wrong person, all the way down to walking into the corner of the damned bed frame every time we enter the spare bedroom. *rubs bruise* Hell, even Pavlov’s dog learned from what had happened before.

That’s just one direction though. I’ve been thinking about this for a while, and I’ve come up with a theory. (It’s probably not new, but if someone else has already thought of it, I’m not aware.) You’d better be sitting down for this one.

What if our whole world is some higher power’s history gone wrong for the umpteenth time? What if whoever built the pyramids went through all the same crap we’re going through, and all they lacked was something other than the pyramids themselves to prove they existed? What if… what if the best thing we have to prove we were here is plastic? That would make the pyramid people better than us! That would mean we’re a worse, more throw-away version, of someone stubbing their toe on the furniture than… than the dinosaurs!!

Yeah, I need more sleep.

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Thanks go to KL Caley for our prompt today, “history.” Check out her blog here: https://new2writing.wordpress.com/about-me/

And don’t forget it’s still not to late to join in the Just Jot It January challenge! Click here for details: https://lindaghill.com/2017/01/29/jusjojan-daily-prompt-jan-29th17/


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Just Jot It Jan 27 – Incomplete

The word “incomplete” has been running around in my head all day. Somewhere at the back, where it hasn’t been in the way much. I’ve been trying to figure out what, in my life, is complete. The final conclusion is nothing. But why?

Well, if I really think about it (in the front of my head), if something is complete, I usually set it aside. And sometimes I forget it. This is a good thing, of course, if the complete thing is not a thing I wanted to keep anyway. So what of the things I do wish to hold onto?

I wouldn’t want a relationship to be complete, because what would be the challenge after that? Things that aren’t challenging become boring. Take games, for example. An unchallenging game, like playing Crazy Eights against myself, would quickly turn into a game of 52-card pickup. For me at least. That’s why they invented Solitaire. I’m convinced of it.

And even worse, who would want someone else to complete them? Oh yeah, the end of Jerry Maguire is romantic and all. But just imagine it. Being completed. You wouldn’t need to get up in the morning.

“Honey, breakfast is on the table!”

“Not coming down today, Sweetheart.”

“But, I made pancakes! And coffee!”

“Nope! I’m done. You did me!”

That would be awful! I’m so glad I’m incomplete.

compromise

Many thanks go to Cyn for our prompt today, “incomplete.” You can check out her latest post here: https://cynk.wordpress.com/2017/01/27/fitness-friday-secret-identity/ Go say hi!

And Just Jot It January is still a fun challenge, even if the month is almost complete. Why? ‘Coz you can join in any time! Click here for details and to read all the awesome posts: https://lindaghill.com/2017/01/27/jusjojan-daily-prompt-jan-27th17/


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Just Jot It Jan 24 – Elusive

“Any word you have to hunt for in a thesaurus is the wrong word.” ~ Stephen King

I used to agree with this wholeheartedly. I still do agree with the gist of it; if it’s not a word you regularly use in your everyday vocabulary, then you’re writing outside of your own voice. And your authorial voice is, arguably, the one thing people read you for. You as opposed to the thousands of other authors who write in the same genre, the same tropes over and over again.

But now? Now that I can’t remember my kids’ names half the time and I often get stuck on a word I know I know, but I just can’t spit it out? The thesaurus has become my favourite book. Can’t come up with that word I use all the time that means “thingamajig”? Look it up in the thesaurus and there it is. It’s a “doohickey”!

Sorry, Mr. King, but I can’t live without my thesaurus. And no, it’s not the wrong word. It’s just the word that went for a stroll. The one I can’t find. You know, the “elusive” one. Yeah, that’s the word.

compromise

Thanks to Evelyn of Eclectic Evelyn for today’s prompt word, “elusive.” You can find her latest post here: http://www.eclecticevelyn.com/welcome-snapchat-wordlesswednesday/

And an enormous thank you to Judy, the hostess with the mostess for the last few days. I can’t express how much I’ve appreciated her help. You can find Judy’s elusive post here: http://www.edwinasepisodes.com/jujojan-january-24th-elusive/ Let’s have a big round of applause for Judy!! 😀

And finally, here’s the daily post with today’s Just Jot It January prompt. Click and join in! https://lindaghill.com/2017/01/23/jusjojan-daily-prompt-jan-24th-elusive/


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#SoCS, Just Jot It Jan 21 – Glass

Ah, finally. After a busy day, sitting with a glass of wine or two, happily flitting to and fro like an insane Pomeranian, trying to choose from the many possibilities on what to write of “glass.”

It’s insane, but here I am communicating to the world as my fingers stroke a keyboard, and symbols which can be read appear on a sheet of backlit glass, to instantaneously fly through the ether and into the homes of so very many onlookers. What power! How would Shakespeare have handled such fluidity of information? How much has been lost…

We are such fragile things, we humans with our egos and our importances that we carry with us from day to day, year to year, some falling away like forgotten leaves beneath the first snow. What if we could get a glimpse back through time to the things we found, in the past, to be life-changing but weren’t? We scoff at it now, just as we scoff at the clothes we wore, captured through the lenses of our memory-saving devices – you know, the ones we never had with us when it was most crucial. But now…now…

So much is seen through glass.

I see through my glass that it is empty, again. Time for a refill, methinks.

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This philosophical post is brought to you by a combination of Stream of Consciousness Saturday and

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Just Jot It January. Click the link, read the posts, and join in! https://lindaghill.com/2017/01/20/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-and-jusjojan-jan-2117/


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Just Jot It Jan 19 – Rubbish?

I always used to think it was a myth — rubbish — that someone’s hair could turn grey overnight. But guess what? I looked in the mirror this afternoon and I’m almost positive my hair is greyer than it was yesterday. Or even this morning. Either everything has caught up with me, finally, or there’s something in my Pantene 2 in 1.

Don’t you just love the word “rubbish,” though? It sounds so much better when you call something inaccurate or that you don’t agree with rubbish rather than garbage. The English have such lovely curse words. It’s not even a curse… I looked in the online thesaurus to see what else I could call it and came up with some interesting words. “Whammy”? “Obloquy”? “Naughty words”? Oh, here we go, “expletive.”

Let’s go back to obloquy. Look that up and I get… “animadversion.” I HAVE to look that up. And it means… “blame.”

I blame the bloody rubbish!

Now that was satisfying.

jjj-2017

Thanks very much to Wendy for today’s prompt, “rubbish.” Please visit her post for today and say hi! You can find it here: https://waffle-with-wendy.blogspot.ca/2017/01/jusjojan-day-19-rubbish.html

And don’t forget, even if you haven’t been participating in Just Jot It January up ’til now, it’s not too late to start! Click here for details and to read the other amazing posts: https://lindaghill.com/2017/01/19/jusjojan-daily-prompt-jan-19th17/

 


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One-Liner Wednesday & #JusJoJan 18/17 Prompt – For Fun

Do you have this problem?

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I’m trying to give up sexual innuendos… but it’s hard… so hard.

NOTE: If you participate in this prompt, you do not have to follow in this week’s potentially sticky theme.

_________________________________________________________________________

The rules for Just Jot It January are as follows:

1. It’s never too late to join in! Here, we run on the honour system; the “jot it” part of JusJoJan means that anything you jot down, anywhere (it doesn’t have to be a post, it can even be a grocery list) counts as a “Jot.” If it makes it to your blog that day, great! If it waits a week to get from a sticky note to your screen, no problem!

2. The prompts will be posted every day at 2am my time (GMT -5). You don’t have to follow the prompt word, but this will be where you leave your link for others to see. Make sure you link your post to the correct day’s prompt. There will be a post like this every day except Wednesday, when the prompt is simply my One-Liner Wednesday, and Saturday, when you’ll find the prompt on my usual Friday Reminder post for Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS).

2a. Since today is Wednesday, I challenge you to make your JusJoJan post a one-liner. If you don’t care to, or if you’ve already written your post, no problem. Remember, with One-Liner Wednesday you can write anything – it’s only a prompt to write one line, not necessarily to keep to the same theme as mine. The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

(i) Make it one sentence.

(ii) Make it either funny or inspirational.

(iii) Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

(iv) Have fun!

(v) Use our One-Liner Wednesday badge!

#1linerWeds badge by nearlywes.com

#1linerWeds badge by nearlywes.com

3. As long as your blog is on WordPress, you’ll be able to link via pingback. To execute a pingback, just copy the URL from the daily prompt post, and paste it anywhere in your post. Check to make sure your link shows up where you want it to, and go back occasionally to see other bloggers’ entries – the more you visit others, the more they’ll visit you! If you’re participating from another blogging host, just drop a link into the comment section. Note: The newest pingbacks and comments will be at the top.

4. Tag your post JusJoJan and/or #JusJoJan.

5. Write anything! Any length will do! It can even be a photo or a drawing – you’re going to title it, right? There’s your jot!

6. The prompts are here both to remind you and to inspire you to write. However, you don’t have to use the prompt word of the day. You can link any kind of jot back here. Even your shopping list. Note: If it’s 18+ content, please say so in a comment with your link.

7. If you’d like to, use the JusJoJan badge (above) in your post so that others can find your post more easily.

8. Have fun!

If you’d like to look ahead to see the upcoming prompt words, click this link: https://lindaghill.com/2016/12/31/just-jot-it-january-2017-rules/ You can always write your post ahead of time and schedule it to come out on the appropriate day.

jjj-2017


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Just Jot It Jan 17 – Complaint

Let’s see, what haven’t I complained about this year yet?

We had a snow day again today–actually, it was a freezing rain day–but I’ve already complained about those. Seems like a Tuesday thing.

Alex was so upset about not going to school today, he came into my room this morning and started smacking me because of the weather. Then, fifteen minutes later, I picked up the cat to stop him from going outside and he turned around and scratched me. And to top all that off, I was sitting on the couch about fifteen minutes after that, and I sneezed on the dog whilst reaching for the tissue box, so the dog pounced on me because I made him jump.

It’s been a rough day. But not my first this year. I’m sure I must have complained about one of those already, so I can’t do that again.

What else, let’s see… I didn’t go out today. I need to get out more. …aaand I’ve already complained about that.

Next!

I haven’t run out of wine yet, so I can’t complain about that. Oh, wait! I ran out of coffee!!! …but I found some more in the cupboard that I must have bought when it was on sale.

Nope! Sorry. Can’t think of anything new. I guess I’m going to just have to be happy, damn it!

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Thanks very much to our very own Willow for today’s prompt, “complaint.” You can visit Willow and read her own JusJoJan post here: https://willowdot21.wordpress.com/2017/01/17/just-jot-it-jauaryday-17-complaint/

And a very special thanks once again to Shan for hosting Just Jot It January for me! Let’s all give her a round of applause!! And make sure you visit and follow her at her blog here, where you’ll find her latest JusJoJan post: http://shanjeniahslovelychaos.com/lovely-chaos-blog/2017/1/16/i-am-penetrable-mindfulmonday-and-jusjojan-day-16-shanjeniahs-lovely-chaos

Don’t forget to check out all the other posts here, and see how you can join in too! https://lindaghill.com/2017/01/17/jusjojan-daily-prompt-jan-17th17/

 

 


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#SoCS, Just Jot It Jan 14 – People

People are funny. Particularly around authors. Most will give you a blank stare if you tell them you’re a writer… I wonder often if they’re just thinking, “what do I say now? And will it end up in a book?” This is why I don’t tell people I’m a writer unless they ask.

But there was one day, a couple of months ago, when I was sitting by the water on my favourite waterfront trail and a woman came along and started talking to me. She told me she was there to write her novel… as if she expected me to be flabbergasted that I was talking to a real writer. We ended up chatting about Amazon and Createspace for the following half an hour, though she couldn’t help herself from occasionally giving me the odd advice on how to write, edit, and publish. No matter how many times I said, “yeah, I know.”

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Fast forward to a few weeks ago when I was sitting in a restaurant, minding my own business, proofreading my own manuscript. It’s printed out in a spiral-bound book and I’ve been working through it with a red pen. The waitress stopped to give me my tea, as waitresses do, and she asked me if I’m a teacher. I said no, I’m a writer. She reacted the way the lady down on the waterfront expected me to.

“You’re writing a book? What kind? Can we buy it at the bookstore? Do you have a card or anything?”

*makes note to get cards or bookmarks printed*

Needless to say I got better-than-average service that evening.

I keep having to remind myself that though many people think they can write a book, not everyone actually does it. I’m surrounded here on WordPress by so many talented people, so many authors and people who know authors, that it has become normal for me. And yet I remember the first time my blog was followed by a “real author” and I was flabbergasted, even though I had already written three novels myself. Because he was published, and I wasn’t.

I love people. People are who populate my novels. I write novels about people, not about events. I don’t write plots – I write about things that happen to people and how those people react, and that builds my plots.

I really need to write more.

Potato.

jjj-2017socsbadge2016-17

This post is brought to you by Stream of Consciousness Saturday and Just Jot It January. The prompt for this week is the letter “p,” with the challenge to start and end the post with a “P” word… thus the potato. Click the following link to join in and read all the other awesome posts! https://lindaghill.com/2017/01/13/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-and-jusjojan-jan-1417/


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One-Liner Wednesday & #JusJoJan 11/17 Prompt – Shovel Buddy

I think they may just have something here, marketing a shovel that looks happy to get your snow cleared:
shovel-buddy1
even Winston is set to go!
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However once the snow gets too deep, Shovel Buddy doesn’t look as enthusiastic:
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and Winston agrees.

"To hell with this, I'm going back in."

“To hell with this, I’m going back in.”

_________________________________________________________________________

The rules for Just Jot It January are as follows:

1. It’s never too late to join in! Here, we run on the honour system; the “jot it” part of JusJoJan means that anything you jot down, anywhere (it doesn’t have to be a post, it can even be a grocery list) counts as a “Jot.” If it makes it to your blog that day, great! If it waits a week to get from a sticky note to your screen, no problem!

2. The prompts will be posted every day at 2am my time (GMT -5). You don’t have to follow the prompt word, but this will be where you leave your link for others to see. Make sure you link your post to the correct day’s prompt. There will be a post like this every day except Wednesday, when the prompt is simply my One-Liner Wednesday, and Saturday, when you’ll find the prompt on my usual Friday Reminder post for Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS).

2a. Since today is Wednesday, I challenge you to make your JusJoJan post a one-liner. If you don’t care to, or if you’ve already written your post, no problem. Remember, with One-Liner Wednesday you can write anything – it’s only a prompt to write one line, not necessarily to keep to the same theme as mine. The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

(i) Make it one sentence.

(ii) Make it either funny or inspirational.

(iii) Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

(iv) Have fun!

(v) Use our One-Liner Wednesday badge!

#1linerWeds badge by nearlywes.com

#1linerWeds badge by nearlywes.com

3. As long as your blog is on WordPress, you’ll be able to link via pingback. To execute a pingback, just copy the URL from the daily prompt post, and paste it anywhere in your post. Check to make sure your link shows up where you want it to, and go back occasionally to see other bloggers’ entries – the more you visit others, the more they’ll visit you! If you’re participating from another blogging host, just drop a link into the comment section. Note: The newest pingbacks and comments will be at the top.

4. Tag your post JusJoJan and/or #JusJoJan.

5. Write anything! Any length will do! It can even be a photo or a drawing – you’re going to title it, right? There’s your jot!

6. The prompts are here both to remind you and to inspire you to write. However, you don’t have to use the prompt word of the day. You can link any kind of jot back here. Even your shopping list. Note: If it’s 18+ content, please say so in a comment with your link.

7. If you’d like to, use the JusJoJan badge (above) in your post so that others can find your post more easily.

8. Have fun!

If you’d like to look ahead to see the upcoming prompt words, click this link: https://lindaghill.com/2016/12/31/just-jot-it-january-2017-rules/ You can always write your post ahead of time and schedule it to come out on the appropriate day.

jjj-2017


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Just Jot It Jan 10 – Danger

Yesterday was the first day back to school for Alex, aaaaand… today’s a snow day. And I’m in danger of losing my mind.

Surprisingly, it’s not in the way you’d think. Yes, I’m quite pissed off at the weather, but for some reason my emotions are leading me toward the crazier, more jump-around-and-be-silly bent. Maybe it’s a precursor to when I go postal later. Or maybe this is how I finally implode into a pile of mushy Mominess.

Is it too early for wine?

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Thanks so much to my friend Matthew for the prompt of the day. Please give him a visit and read his latest post here: https://singularfiction.wordpress.com/2017/01/09/polishing-that-draft/

And thank you once again to Dan the magnificent, who has helped me for the past three days with Just Jot It January. I’m sure without him I’d have already imploded. You can visit Dan here: https://nofacilities.com/

Did you know you can join us in the Just Jot It January challenge any time? Click the following link to find out how, and to read all the other amazing posts! https://lindaghill.com/2017/01/10/jusjojan-daily-prompt-jan-10th17/