Linda G. Hill

Life in progress


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264. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Note: Strong language. Also, don’t read this whilst eating.

Tuesday, May 22nd, 5:00pm
Andrea (and Ralph)

 

Andrea sits at window. Ralph takes the seat beside her.

Ralph: Good afternoon.

Andrea: Yeah? What’s so good about it?

Ralph: Oh I don’t know. I’m feeling pretty good.

Andrea: Good for you! I’ve had a lousy day. First of all my alarm clock, like, doesn’t go off on time? And I have to take a taxi to work, then I get there and the coffee pot’s, like, broken so I have to wait ’til lunch time to get a dose of caffeine, and then I come back and, like, this new guy? Who just started working? He won’t shut up with the innuendos. You know, like, comin’ on to me and shit. I’m like dude, you’re like more than thirty years old!

Ralph: Sounds like a rough day.

Andrea: (snorts) You could say that.

Ralph: I just got out of hospital. I started shitting green stuff and before I knew it I was …

Andrea: (holds up hand) Please, don’t go on.

Ralph: … puking up all this brown crap, and I hadn’t been eating anything brown …

Andrea: (gags) Please.

Ralph: … so it was like my puke was coming out of my ass and sh …

Andrea: (stands, hand over mouth) Excuse me.

Ralph: … it coming out of my …

Andrea: MOVE!

Ralph: … throat.

Andrea stands at the door retching, waiting for the bus stop.

Ralph: (calling out to her) Hope you have a better day tomorrow!

 

Next stop: Wednesday, May 23rd, 6:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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One-Liner Wednesday – We have a New Badge! 2018-19 edition

First, I’d like to say one last thank-you to Dan Antion for your wonderful 2017-18 One-Liner Wednesday badge. It has served us well for the past year, and won’t be forgotten.

All together now: Thanks, Dan!

#1linerWeds badge by Dan Antion

I guess you’re wondering who, won, eh?

Not so fast.

In 3rd place we had Connection by Wire by J-Dub. Thank you, Jill! Honorable mention goes to you.

Close behind, in 4th place was Take My Card by John Holton. Cheers, John! You’ve won two of my contests so far (SoCS badge and create-the-hashtag #1linerWeds). Keep trying for number three!

Then all close together in the votes from 5th to 8th place came Blue Sky and Clouds by Hip to be Snark, Shoreline by Frank Hubeny, Don’t say no by Jim Adams, and Giraffes by Myrna in that order. Thanks so much to you all for participating!

But wait, you might be saying. There were nine badges. Why are there only eight places?

We had a tie for second place!!

The two silver medals (virtual silver medals, that is–don’t get your hopes up) go to

The Waving Girl by Melissa

and

Bird on a Post by Bethany K,

which means our new One-Liner Wednesday badge is Peace, Love, and Please by Cheryl!!

Thanks so much to our runners-up, Melissa and Bethany. The race was extremely close!

And congratulations Cheryl!! I look forward to sharing your little guy every week for the next year. ❤ 😀

#1linerWeds badge by Cheryl, at dreamingreality646941880.wordpress.com/

Thanks again to all who participated. It was fun! ‘Til next May!