Life in progress

Category Archives: Life


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The Life of a Caregiver

Life is strange, isn’t it?

I have to wonder sometimes at its fairness – how some of us get to stay relatively healthy while we watch our loved-ones fall apart.

Some believe it’s all predestined: were those who are put into the role of caregiver always meant to be one? Were they somehow chosen? I’ve heard it said that people who have ended up caring for others may be challenged by a higher power… that they are, by divine intervention, simply the person for the job. Some are able to make their own choice to work in the service of those who are less fortunate, or who are sick, some have no choice other than the choice to run away.

I’m a great believer that everything happens for a reason, though not necessarily in a mystical sense. Good and bad must always have a balance. The weights tip back and forth but nothing is ever absolute. Therefore what weakens us or challenges us can also strengthen us. Positivity can be found in the worst imaginable scenario, if we look hard enough.

What I struggle with mostly is deciding whether being the healthy one is a blessing or a curse. At first glance you think those who are ill have it the worst – and they do. There is no questioning that. But. What of the caregiver, having to watch those he or she loves suffer so?

I suppose it all comes down to the old adage, life is what you make it. In the darkest times, light can be found. But for whom is it hardest to find?


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SoCS – Info Overload

My internet connectivity has been so spotty today it may as well have measles. So I’m on the little transformer – a glorified tablet with a keyboard attached – that I took to Japan with me. It fits in my purse but unlike my laptop seems to have a good, well, decent, wireless capability.

You see, I’m not at home. I’m out visiting a college campus as it’s the cheapest place I could find to stay. It’s my weekend off and since my ex has no where else to go, he’s looking after the kids at my house. It’s my only chance to get some work done. And working I have been! I’m so very happy to be almost at the end of my current edit. Then it will be back to the beginning of the novel once more and that should be it.

I do very much hope to start blogging again too, and to begin reading all the great blogs out there that I have sorely missed. I also hope to actually write something interesting soon… I think this post has failed miserably.

That’s enough information overload about me. What’s new with you?

Badge by: Doobster at Mindful Digressions

Badge by: Doobster at Mindful Digressions

Check out Stream of Consciousness Saturday and join in with a post of your own! https://lindaghill.com/2015/06/05/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-june-615/


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One-Liner Wednesday – Morning Logic

…from my best friend, John:

If “I think, therefore I am,” does that mean I don’t exist before coffee?

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Anyone who would like to try it out, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a ping back, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a ping back from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Make it either funny or inspirational.

Have fun!


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One-Liner Wednesday – Love is…

CAM00673If I could reach up

and hold a star

for every time you’ve made me smile…

…the entire evening sky would be

in the palm of my hand.

Edit: Find the artist who created the image on this fridge magnet here: http://deloresart.blogspot.ca/
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Anyone who would like to try it out, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a ping back, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a ping back from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Make it either funny or inspirational.

Have fun!


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One-Liner Wednesday – Throw ‘Em a Pool Noodle

You can’t save someone who lacks the desire to have an active role in his or her own rescue.

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Anyone who would like to try it out, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a ping back, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a ping back from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Make it either funny or inspirational.

Have fun!


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The Cycles of Mother’s Day

I have memories as a child of preparing breakfast, with my father’s help, to bring to my mother in bed on Mother’s Day. I knew as well as he did that it would be no surprise, but we pretended, he and I. I remember a few odd gifts I gave her over the years, but the one that stands out the most was a garbage bag full of well-fermented horse shit I brought home in my car from the ranch where I worked. Her roses loved it and yet she still rolls her eyes over it.

As a new mother myself, my very first Mother’s Day was a revelation. Being pampered by my son’s father was a dream come true. Those beginning years were special indeed – breakfast in bed was mine, although sometimes those breakfasts were inedible having been made with love by my young children. I grinned and did my best to eat them without gagging anyway.

Today I find the cycle has changed once again. I made the coffee last night so Alex, my youngest, could come downstairs ahead of me and push the button to start the coffeemaker. I’m in the not-so-unique position of being single, having my three sons at home, and soon I will be picking my own mother up to spend the day caring for her, though she’d never concede to the idea that it’s the other way around. She wants me to depend on her and I’m okay with that. It’s like a dance, graceful in its complexity with me agreeing to almost anything and her… I’m not sure if she still understands that I’m doing it or not, but the grand act of denial, if that’s what she does, is Oscar-worthy. And of course there are my own children. To an extent my eldest is taking care of me, helping me not to pull my hair out both with his physical aid in babysitting and housework and his awesome sense of humour.

So it goes. The child becomes the mother, the caregiver; the giver of life as she comes closer to the end of her own, becomes dependent once again.

I love being a mother, but in the end it can be likened to a bag of horse shit. For the amount of work it takes, the load of stress that accompanies it, and the headache-inducing number of eyerolls, I wouldn’t trade it for the world.


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One-Liner Wednesday – Keepin’ it simple

You will not achieve what you want by focusing on what you don’t.

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Anyone who would like to try it out, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a ping back, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a ping back from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Make it either funny or inspirational.

Have fun!

 


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Zzzoomin’ through to A-Z Reflections

It was a great month for blogging, wasn’t it? I met some really fantastic bloggers during the A-Z Challenge this year and although I started off visiting you all, I kinda fell off as time went on. I still hope to get caught up on all your posts!

My excuse – April was a tough one for me. My stress level finally reached the boiling point on Thursday and I literally ran away from home, meaning I made sure the kids were taken care of and I zzzoomed on outta here and spent the night at my mother’s empty condo. Which makes this both my reflections post and my unofficial “Z” post rolled into one.

My task for the month of May is getting rid of the above mentioned condo. Lawyers, real estate agents, auctioneers and moving trucks will be a huge part of my immediate future.

Just to reiterate, I WILL be doing One-Liner Wednesday and the Friday Stream of Consciousness prompts for the rest of May, and hopefully I’ll be up and running my blog as per usual in June. Don’t forget, you can still find me every day at my fiction blog here: http://lindaghillfiction.com/ … I can’t possibly stop writing altogether. And, of course, I’ll be editing my novel in the hopes of getting it published this year.

As a random note, I’ll be turning off the comments on my “K is for Key” post. For some reason the spammers are targeting it – I’m getting two or three spam comments on it every day. Weird.

Be well my friends and fellow writers. I wish you a wonderful month of May.

 


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Y is for Yielding – it’s a two-parter!

To yield – to give under the weight of something. How relieving it is to yield. We live in a world where we feel we must harden ourselves to most things. Never give up, never give in is our motto most of the time. We fight the system, we advocate for our kids, we push and push ourselves to do better, get more done, find more time, improve ourselves and our way of living… the list is endless.

But how good is it to yield to sleep at night? I find myself wishing often not to give up, but to have a chance to give in, just a little and not fight quite as hard, yet giving just a bit feels like defeat.

“Notice that the stiffest tree is most easily cracked, while the bamboo or willow survives by bending with the wind.”
― Bruce Lee

Yielding is a way to survive. Thank you, Bruce Lee.

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On a completely different note, I can’t leave this post without mentioning what I found in my thesaurus. One synonym in particular jumps out at me. “Quaggy.” Yes, “quaggy.” I’d never heard this word before five minutes ago. So I’ll look it up. From dictionary.com:

quaggy
[kwag-ee, kwog-ee]

adjective, quaggier, quaggiest.
1. of the nature of or resembling a quagmire; marshy; boggy.
2. soft or flabby: quaggy flesh.

I’ll never view Family Guy quite the same again. Giggidy.


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Balance

I’ve spent much of today attempting to find some sort of balance. In times of stress and knowing that I have an overwhelming amount of work ahead, I fall back heavily on Taoist philosophy. There is a certain logic in it, much like Newton’s theory that for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. In Taoist belief there is no such thing as absolute – even though balance may fall to one side or the other, neither fully black (or yin) nor fully white (or yang) exist. This is of course a very simplified explanation. One would have to study the Tao Te Ching to come close to understanding it all, and even then…

But this isn’t meant to be a philosophy lesson. It’s about having too much of one thing and not enough of another. In my case it’s too much thought–or forethought–and not enough action. The solution is to do things. Today, while I await the start of my week and all the tasks that I can’t complete or even start until the time is right, I needed to keep myself busy and I did, to an extent.

Next week, when I’m busy as all hell, I’ll be looking for ways to sit and gather my thoughts so that I can organize my time so that I can get as much done in the small space I have as possible. In between, I hope to be able to blog. That is my reward. I go crazy when I’m not able to create. I feel useless; unproductive. Even if I’m getting lots done.

Balance is something I strive for all the time. Most of the time I’m unbalanced anyway. Please wish me luck for the next week.