Linda G. Hill

Life in progress


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313. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Tuesday, July 10th, 5:00pm
Jocelyn and Jody

 

Jody: Mommy?

Jocelyn: (tiredly) Yes?

Jody: Can I be a rocket when I grow up?

Jocelyn: No, you can not be a rocket when you grow up.

Jody: Why not?

Jocelyn: Because a rocket is a thing, and you are not a thing. You’re a person.

Jody: But that new kid Jackie said his dad says he’s gonna send Jackie’s mom to the moon. How can Jackie’s mom go to the moon if she’s not a rocket?

Jocelyn: (thinks for a moment) Jackie needs to keep his mouth shut.

Jody: Jackie said his dad says that too.

Jocelyn: Does your daycare worker know?

Jody: (shrugs) Prolly. Jackie’s mom is my new daycare worker. She doesn’t look like a rocket. But Sammy says her tits look like torpedoes.

Jocelyn: Jody!

Jody: Well that’s what Sammy says.

Jocelyn: I think we need to look for another daycare.

 

Next stop: Wednesday, July 11th, 5:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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280. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Thursday, June 7th, 4:00pm
Jocelyn and Jody

 

Jody: Mommy?

Jocelyn: Yes, dear?

Jody: (points to a nun, seated across the aisle) Is that a penguin?

Jocelyn: No, that’s a nun.

Jody: That’s what Daddy told me.

Jocelyn: (frowns) What did Daddy tell you?

Jody: I asked if there were any penguins here, and he said there’s none.

 

Next stop: Friday, June 8th, 9:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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One-Liner Wednesday – The F-Word

Last week, sitting in a restaurant beside a mother with two daughters, aged about five and eight years old, I overheard:

Five-year-old: I said the f-word by accident yesterday.

Eight-year-old: Which one?

Five: You know, the fword.

Eight: (whispers) Frozen?

Five: No, the one Mommy always says.

It was all I could do; 1, not to laugh (because we all know Frozen is a bad word); and 2, not to look at the mother and embarrass her.


If you would like to participate in this prompt, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a pingback, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post, and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, like Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a pingback from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Try to make it either funny or inspirational.

3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

4. Add our very cool badge to your post for extra exposure!

5. Have fun!

#1linerWeds badge by Dan Antion

 

 


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199. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Sunday, March 18th, 10:00am
Deborah and Tilden

 

Tilden: Mommy?

Deborah: Yes, Tilden?

Tilden: Why do you say “life goes on”?

Deborah: Well, honey, sometimes life is difficult. But it doesn’t stop for anybody.

Tilden: You mean except dead people?

Deborah: Right. Except for dead people.

Tilden: Why doesn’t life go on for dead people?

Deborah: Because they’re dead.

Tilden: But you said Gramma will live in your heart forever.

Deborah: That’s true. I did say that.

Tilden: So life goes on for Gramma too?

Deborah: Only in spirit.

Tilden: (thinks for a few minutes) Can Gramma’s spirit buy me a birthday present?

Deborah: (puts her arm around him) No, honey.

 

Next stop: Monday, March 19th, 5:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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129. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Sunday, January 7th, 3:00pm
Christine and Teddy

 

Teddy: Mom?

Christine: Yeah, honey?

Teddy: Why is it so cold out?

Christine: ‘Coz it’s winter.

Teddy: Why is it winter?

Christine: ‘Coz that’s just what time of year it is.

Teddy: Don’t bears go to sleep in the winter?

Christine: Yes they do.

Teddy: Why don’t we go to sleep in the winter?

Christine: Because we don’t need to.

Teddy: Do bears need to?

Christine: Yes.

Teddy: Do you need to?

Christine: Only at night.

Teddy: Why do you have to sleep at night?

Christine: Same reason you do.

Teddy: But sometimes I don’t sleep at night.

Christine: I’m painfully aware of that.

Teddy: Does it hurt?

Christine: Not really.

Teddy: Then why do you keep telling me to go to sleep?

Christine: Because you need sleep.

Teddy: Is that why you called me Teddy?

Christine: (regards him) Yes.

 

Next stop: Monday, January 8th, 7:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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47. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Tuesday, October 17th, 2:00pm
Madigan and Missy

 

Missy: Mommy, what’s a “seatful prick”?

Madigan: That’s DEceitful, and you don’t say the word “prick.” It’s not nice. What were you doing awake at eleven last night anyway?

Missy: I woke up when Shadow barked. Who were you talking to?

Madigan: Never you mind.

Missy: Was it Uncle Ken?

Madigan: (regards her daughter) What makes you think it was Uncle Ken?

Missy: Oh just ‘coz Auntie Barb called him that.

Madigan: And when did you hear that?

Missy: The day you went to work and I stayed at Auntie Barb’s place.

Madigan: Two weeks ago?

Missy: (shrugs) I guess.

Madigan: Did you hear anything else?

Missy: (nods) Uh-huh.

Madigan: What else did you hear?

Missy: Auntie Barb told him that he was no better than her sister. Isn’t you her sister, Mommy?

Madigan: Yes. (gazes out the window)

Missy: Are you “seatful,” Mommy?

Madigan: Not as much as Auntie Barb is.

 

Next stop: Wednesday, October 18th, 6:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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27. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Wednesday, September 27th, 10:00am
Deborah, Tilden and Prescott

 

Tilden: Mommy?

Deborah: Yes. sweetie?

Tilden: Why don’t you just feed Prescott?

Deborah: I’ll wait ’til we get home.

Tilden: But he’s hungry now.

Deborah: I can’t feed him now.

Tilden: Why not?

Deborah: Because we’re in a public place.

Tilden: So?

Deborah: So, people don’t want to see me feed your brother.

Tilden: But you said it’s natural.

Deborah: That’s right.

Tilden: So what’s wrong with it?

Deborah: I don’t know, sweetie.

Five minutes goes by with Prescott crying.

Tilden: Mommy?

Deborah: Yes, Tilden?

Tilden: Prescott is really hungry, and he’s getting on my nerve.

Deborah: We’re almost home.

Tilden: Just whip it out and feed him.

Deborah: TILDEN!

Tilden: That’s what Daddy says!

Deborah: That’s when we’re at home.

Tilden: Can’t I even say it in public?

 

Next stop: Thursday, September 28th, 8:00am

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.