Life in progress

Category Archives: Random


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#SoCS – Belonging

I think it’s going to be a long month. I signed up for NaNo Camp but I haven’t written a word yet. I haven’t even opened the story that I want to finish off for the NaNo project. I’m kind of at that paralised stage at the moment, where there’s so much to do I don’t know where to start so instead I play a mindless casual game in order to escape the pressure. And so I got this image in my head that I wrote about on my fiction blog about half an hour ago as my SoCS post over there for today. It’s fiction, but only in the sense that I’m not quite at that stage yet. I might be, before August gets here. You’ll find the link to that post in the comments below the link for this one – it’s not a long piece.

I sometimes wonder where I belong, you see. I belong to my family and to myself, to the extent that I have my own interests to pursue. I signed up for the editing course I’ve been talking about forever. It’s online at Simon Fraser University in BC, Canada. If I can earn the certificate I will have the opportunity to get into Editors Canada, the highest qualification in the land. From there I may start working toward my English degree. But that’s a long way off. I need the editing courses to freelance and earn the money I’ll need to get my BA.

At times I feel as though I belong to the world of literature. I thrive there. At times I feel like I’m biding my time, waiting to get there. But my responsibilities will always be at home, to my kids.  Now I have to decide what Chris, my middle son will do with the rest of his life. He’s ambitious but autistic and largely unable to secure a position anywhere for himself. He, too, would like to go back to school, to college, but he’s never been without one-on-one help. It’s scary for me to contemplate.

So many decisions, so little time. So much to do, and not long enough to do it. And yet, July will take forever to be over. What a paradox.

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Stream of Consciousness Saturday is fun! Click the link to see how you, too, can join in! https://lindaghill.com/2016/07/01/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-july-216/


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Is it Live? Or is it Internet?

Do you remember the old Memorex commercial? No? If you’re wondering why I’m asking, see the title of this post. Okay, on with my point.

What kind of person are you? Are you like me and wonder what happened to someone if they don’t show up online for, like, twelve hours? Or do you figure they’re just living their life in real life? Because seriously, it’s hard to differentiate between online life and real life sometimes. If someone stays offline for three days it’s not the same as if they don’t come out of their house for three days. But we still wonder, are they laying on the kitchen floor in the puddle of grease they slipped on because it’s been thirty-six hours since they last posted a picture of a cat on Facebook?

You hear stories of how the mailman calls 911 because the old lady in 226 hasn’t emptied her mailbox since last Tuesday, but you do the same thing for your online friends and you end up with the police knocking on YOUR door with a restraining order. Okay, there may be exceptions: like when they don’t show up online for months (yeah, I’m looking at you, Paul Curran). But the fact is, we don’t really (usually) know what goes on in the background of our online friend’s lives. Just like we shouldn’t judge people by the way they look, we shouldn’t necessarily worry or think others are ignoring us when they’re not around the internet at the same time every day.

I do consider my online friends as friends. It’s a totally different friendship we have with our physical neighbours though. Right?

How soon do you start to worry?


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#SoCS – Classes

I’d be a full-time student if I could. Most of what is holding me back is time. I’d hate to spend all that money (which would have to come in the form of government grants, but still) and then find out I haven’t got enough hours in the day to complete a course. So I wait until the perfect time. HA! Yeah, that’s going to come along.

What I do think I’ll be able to manage though, is a course from the college where I graduated from my writing program. One of the classes they offered but I didn’t take because it didn’t fit with what I was doing at the time, was for writing memoirs. I could really use that for my story about Alex and parenting a Deaf child, when I get the chance to gather all that up. Yeah, time again.

Speaking of time, how pathetic is it that I almost didn’t get my post for my own prompt written before midnight? I was so afraid I’d not get my fiction one done, that I wrote it before this. It’s also a SoCS post – I’m actually quite proud of it. Often when I write stream of consciousness fiction it ends up sucking. But I don’t think today’s did. I hope you’ll check it out. The link to it is over there —-> on the right-hand sidebar. At least right now it’s there. Next week it probably won’t be there, so you’ll have to look for it with the rest of the links in the comments of this post. Where you can join in too! It’s fun!!!

I wonder if I’d be as enthusiastic about taking classes if I had to go back to the same set-up as we had in public school. Tiny little desks, teachers who demanded respect and sent you out into the hall if they didn’t get it… lousy cafeteria food, and hall monitors. Now the only monitor I have to deal with is the one I’m looking at when I type.

I skipped school a lot. Writing this, I can see why.

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#SoCS – Limbo

I was always good at doing the limbo when I was younger. Now I probably suck at it. In fact, I’m afraid to even try it. I have to wonder if it somehow prepared me for the more…what’s the word… existential form of limbo I face now. The constant feeling I’ve had for many years that there’s something more out there for me. Riches, lifestyle, fame… I can admit to craving those things maybe 20 years ago. (make that 30) But then again I didn’t have kids to worry about 30 years ago. I could do with the first two now – riches and a better lifestyle – but fame is something I can do without. I like being invisible.

The feeling of limbo has changed. Morphed in some way. Back thirty years ago I had no idea how I might achieve such things. Now I at least have writing… not likely to gain me all these things, but the minute possibility is there. And hey, who could have imagined I’d have even this many people interested in what I have to say? Me, the wallflower at parties – the one of the couple who used to stand back and listen to what everyone else was chatting about, and only speaking when spoken to.

The limbo is wrapped up now in waiting to be published. I’m very very close with the smaller project. The bigger one needs more work, but I’m still determined to get it out there before the year is up. I promised my muse I would, after all.

NOTE: Don’t forget to check the comments in this week’s prompt to be sure your link is there!! Not all of the pingbacks are working.

This post is part of Stream of Consciousness Saturday. Click the link to find out how you can join in too! https://lindaghill.com/2016/06/10/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-june-1116/

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Is it as sexist if a woman does it?

Saturday afternoon found yours truly enjoying a beer on the patio of one of Kingston’s livelier establishments. At this particular place, since it is Irish, the waiting staff wear kilts. Both the girls and the guys.

My table was adjacent to a table where three middle-aged women were sitting. Between us, a waiter stood talking to some customers. His back was to the other table. I watched as one of the women extended her arm and wiggled her fingers below the hem of the waiter’s kilt, as though she was going to reach up under it and tickle… something. I didn’t know whether to smile or be appalled. In retrospect, I’m pretty sure it’s the latter.

So let’s see… what is your reaction? Take the poll:

I could probably have come up with some more answers, but I’m interested to see what you have to say. Let’s discuss.

Edit for clarification: The woman didn’t come in contact with the waiter, and he didn’t notice she did it.


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#SoCS – In the Books

I think this year will go down in the books as the one when everyone died. Then again, all the pioneers of modern rock, the movie stars, and the famous people I’ve grown up with are getting older. Was it like this for my parents when the likes of the Rat Pack began to die off? I suppose. And I’m sure all the young’uns now will have an impact on our kids’ generation when they begin to pass away. Yet somehow I think this is a bit different. It seems to me that aging bands such as the Rolling Stones, The Who, Led Zepplin… they have a continued base in society unlike the greats of old. When the remainder of those bands disappear it won’t just affect we who are now in middle age. It will affect us all.

So today, Mohammad Ali. I found a meme on Facebook which included a quote:

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Things we should all strive to be remembered for.

On a lighter note…

I picked up a book off the bargain shelf a long while ago, and I’ve just started reading it. I have to say, half-way through I’m totally engrossed. It’s a little romantic, but mostly it delves into the quirks and psychology of its characters in an amazingly profound way. It’s humorous, sad, and absolutely entertaining. Faking It by Elisa Lorello is something you’ll want to pick up. http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?url=search-alias%3Dstripbooks&field-keywords=faking+it+elisa+lorello

I use Booking.com a lot. In fact, I’m sitting in a room in a B&B as I type this. It’s warm in here. I’m in Kingston, and half-way between temptation to walk around and take pictures of doors and wander around the waterfront (and find a patio to sit and eat lunch) and take advantage of the quiet time away to work on one of my books. I’m this close to getting my novelette published (just have to go through proofreads and get a blurb written), I’m that close to my final edit of my epic novel, The Great Dagmaru, and I’m dying to work on finishing the first draft of the sequel.  Maybe I’ll work on one of those until I get really hungry… or my bum goes numb.

This post is part of Stream of Consciousness Saturday. Click the link to join in! https://lindaghill.com/2016/06/03/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-june-416/

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#SoCS – Under Pressure

I’ve been battling a headache all day. It’s right behind my right eye, so I’m typing this with my eyes closed. I’m tempted to not fix any mistakes…

I think my headache is due to the barometric pressure. I’ve suffered with barometer headaches for years. I find unless I take an anti-inflammatory when I first feel it coming on, it won’t go away. Stress doesn’t help either.

I went to the mall today to find the dvd “Alice in Wonderland” – the Johnny Depp one – for Alex. Went into seven different stores and couldn’t find it. I’m blaming the new movie on the fact that everyone was sold out. I was impressed at how much of a comeback vinyl is making in the record stores. I have to wonder if the quality is the same as it used to be though. If it’s taken from a digital recording and put on an album, it isn’t going to have the same depth as it did from the master. I need to find out how they’re making vinyl recordings these days.

Anyway, I came home and found the DVD for $8 Canadian on Amazon, so I ordered it. So weird. And did you hear the news about Johnny yesterday? His new wife has a restraining order and is claiming he abused her physically. I was appalled at how many people on Twitter yesterday had already convicted him and thrown away the key without hearing a single word on his side of the story. I’m not saying he didn’t do it – he may just admit to it when he does come out and speak. What gets me though is all the armchair justice and vitriol from people who either never liked him in the first place, or are obviously jealous of his status in the world. I say that because many of the comments were “people will continue to buy his movies anyway.” What has that even got to do with it? He’s not the only person who stands to make royalties on them. Ugh, society and social media really get on my nerves sometimes.

I think my headache is gone. Thanks, Johnny.

SoCS badge 2015This post is part of Stream of Consciousness Saturday! Click the link to join in today! https://lindaghill.com/2016/05/27/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-may-2816/


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Quick! I need suggestions!

At 9:45 tomorrow morning I’m getting my eyes checked. That means I won’t be able to see properly for most of the rest of the day. How will I survive without the computer?! What will I do with my day tomorrow?!!

I need ideas!!!


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Honest Opinions Wanted

As you probably know, my theme for the A to Z Challenge this year is parenting a Deaf child as a hearing mom. I decided on this theme mainly because I hope one day to write a book on the subject. The A to Z seemed an easy way to compile my thoughts into something that could be organized into chapters. I’m not including every aspect of what it is to be Alex’s parent since not everything fits. But most of it is or will be here.

My plan is to market it as much a guide for people who have Deaf children, as for people who have hearing children. I hope to provide insight into behaviours, reading and understanding body language, and generally to teach parents and children how to spot and be compassionate toward those with limited abilities. Hopefully, without coming off as preachy. The book, if I write it, will be entitled, Don’t Talk With Your Hands Full.

I’m not going to ask you if you’d actually buy my book – I’m not here to put you on the spot. But if you saw something like it on the shelf, and hadn’t already read as much as I’ve written, do you think you’d be interested enough to at least read the back cover? Do you know anyone who doesn’t read my blog who might buy it? Basically, do you think it could be a worthwhile endeavour?

I appreciate honest opinions. Don’t be afraid to hurt my feelings; I take criticism well, as long as it’s constructive.


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#SoCS – Be

What do you want to be when you grow up? I used to hate that question. I never had a real answer because I had no idea. It, to me, was an impractical question. I’m ten! How would I know? Hold on, while I weigh my options… I used to be envious of the kids who could just spurt out a profession like it was what they were born for. How about, I want to be a caring, compassionate human being. It’s something else to know how you want to occupy yourself when you reach a certain age, isn’t it?

Right now I’m occupying myself with my laptop, awkwardly typing with the puppy’s head on my lap, and my kid is making weird gurgling noises at his own computer while he feeds from his pump. The tv is on but there’s no sound – nobody is watching it. Not even the dog. Is it true that dogs can’t see tvs? Is that a myth? Or was it just true of the old curved screens? Because Winston seems to be able to see my flat screen.

I had to get up to feed the dog. He made me put the computer down. I’m almost out of milk. I panic when that happens, because it means I’ll either have to drink my morning coffee black or not at all. And that last option is not an option. As my best friend observed, I don’t exist before coffee. I am not.

To be, or not to be? Ask me after coffee. I think my brain just exploded.

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This mind-bending post is brought to you by Stream of Consciousness Saturday. Click here https://lindaghill.com/2016/04/01/theres-no-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-april-216/ to find out how you can join in!