Life in progress

Tag Archives: family


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Anxiety in Children

I thought it would be better by now, but it’s just getting worse. My son, Alex, as most of you know, is Deaf, and he hates masks. Anyone dressed in a costume is an extreme cause of stress for him, from the Easter Bunny, to Santa, to his school mascot. I believe it’s mostly because he can’t see their facial expressions, and thus can’t determine whether or not they are friendly or threatening. Whatever it is, Hallowe’en is the worst time of year.

This morning, getting him to go to school to spend the day with his friends was difficult, to say the least. He doesn’t seem to understand that the people he knows are inside the costumes. He’s sixteen years old physically, but at a mental age of six or seven. It’s not likely to get any better from here.

My concern is that I’m perpetuating the problem. Today I drove him to school so I could be there to reassure him everything was okay. He was nervous (he’s been having anxiety attacks every night before bed for the past week) even though he was able to explain to me himself that masks and scary costumes were not permitted at school. So okay, he needs support. I think there’s a fine line between coddling him and reassuring him when his fears are legitimate. But should I be the one supporting him at this point in his life?

I’m not going to be around forever. As he becomes an adult, there will be a time when he can no longer run to Mommy when there’s a problem. I believe he needs to start, at some point, (soon?) to rely on society to feel safe.

I’m at a loss. Any suggestions are welcome.


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Thank you!

I want to express my deepest gratitude to all who have bought and shared my novelette, All Good Stories. I’m truly grateful for this WordPress community, and I’m humbled by the outpouring of love and caring I’ve found here, from friends and strangers alike. Since I posted my plea for help, I’ve sold 79 copies and gone from #1,600,000 on the Kindle Paid Best Seller List to #14,376, which is awesome. More importantly than that, I’ve doubled the number of reviews on Amazon.com to six. Only 19 to go to reach that magic number where Amazon begins to promote my book!

I’m still hoping to reach $100 in royalties, which means 350 sales; Amazon only pays me 35 cents on a 99 cent book. It seems an insurmountable goal, but maybe it’s not. If you haven’t shared  this post yet, please do so. Any social media will do. And if you have read the book, please take the time to write a review. Just five minutes of your time is invaluable to me. It only needs to be a sentence.

You can find my original post here: https://lindaghill.com/2016/10/25/im-out/ and here are the links for the book, as well as my Goodreads page:

Amazon.com (U.S.A.) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01JQWMQAE
Amazon.ca (Canada) https://www.amazon.ca/dp/B01JQWMQAE
Amazon.co.uk (United Kingdom) https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B01JQWMQAE
Amazon.com.au (Australia) https://www.amazon.com.au/dp/B01JQWMQAE
and on Amazon, in English, almost everywhere else in the world, as well as
Kobo https://store.kobobooks.com/en-ca/ebook/all-good-stories

Linda on Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/15577348.Linda_G_Hill

Thank you so very much. 🙂

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One-Liner Wednesday – Birthdays

The boy and his puppy both have a birthday this week.

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One is 16, the other turns one today. Happy birthdays, Alex and Winston. 🙂

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Anyone who would like to participate, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do,
you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a ping back, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post, and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, like Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a ping back from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Try to make it either funny or inspirational.

3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

4. Add our very cool badge to your post for extra exposure!

5. Have fun!

#1linerWeds badge by nearlywes.com

#1linerWeds badge by nearlywes.com


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#SoCS – Jagged

It’s strange, the edge upon which we exist here on earth. Half-way between life and death, birth and life. Full of ups and downs, we tip this way and that. Joy and sorrow, anxiousness and contentment. If we’re lucky enough to find a balance, we can make it through without much fuss.

I’ve been teetering today. Thrown off balance by the news of a friend’s passing. We, many of us, knew him well. He saw the joy in life through most of what he went through. He was always there with his own brand of encouragement and support. His friend contacted me through my comments on Facebook, to say that he talked about this world here in blogland often. That blogging had become his life.

Our friend’s name is Paul Curran. I like to think of him looking down on us, knowing we’re thinking of him, as he knows we have before. And that, to coin his favourite interjection, he’s pointing down and saying “Ha! I actually made an impression.”

You certainly did, Paul. And a good one at that.

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The Friday Reminder and Prompt for #SoCS Oct. 8/16


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One-Liner Wednesday – Wait, the fridge doesn’t have spell-check?!

Found upon waking one morning last week:

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My grocery shopping skillz are up to par: spicey KD (Kraft Dinner) is awesome.

It took me a long time to find fridge-magnet letters, now it looks like I need a red pen for drawing squiggly lines.

 

 _____________________________________________________________________________

Anyone who would like to participate, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do,
you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a ping back, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post, and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, like Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a ping back from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Try to make it either funny or inspirational.

3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

4. Add our very cool badge to your post for extra exposure!

5. Have fun!

#1linerWeds badge by nearlywes.com

#1linerWeds badge by nearlywes.com


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#SoCS – Bussing

If a busser bussing tables runs into you in a restaurant, is it like getting hit by a bus? I’ve always wondered why they call it “bussing.” And why does my spell-check not like the word? Does it like “busing” better? Yes, it does. When I finish this post, I’ll check to see if it’s a Canadian spelling. Spell-check also doesn’t like “colour,” after all.

I never took a bus to school. It was only half a mile to walk, so they let me walk. Even when I was five and six, I was walking to school by myself. There weren’t many crazies about. But I do remember sitting on the curb on the way home from school one day with a friend, and we were throwing stones under cars as they went by. One woman stopped and yelled at us, even though we didn’t actually hit her car. By then we were getting good at clearing the wheels before the car got past. We stopped after the lady yelled at us… until the next day. I think I eventually got bored with it.

What I did do when I was little was make up stories in my head. All the time. That is something I still haven’t gotten bored with.

My kids have always taken the bus to school. When we lived in Gatineau, Quebec, the school board payed a student $5/day to sit with my Autistic son, Chris, on the bus. The first year a student we didn’t know did it, but after that they let his brother do it. Years later, I still have all that money sitting in a bank account for him, for when/if he decides to go to college.

I’m actually appalled at the fact that they no longer have an aide on the bus my Deaf son, Alex, takes to and from school. The bus driver doesn’t know sign language, and the kids, by the time June comes, are up to all kinds of antics. I should probably advocate for an aide.

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This post is brought (not by bus) to you as a response to Stream of Consciousness Saturday. Click the link for the prompt and join in today! https://lindaghill.com/2016/09/23/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-sept-2416/


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Angriest, a #SoCS Rant (with swear words and everything)

There are a few things that annoy me about people, but what gets me angriest is when people get annoyed at my kids. This rant is brought on by a trip to the grocery store earlier today and a woman behind us in line. There isn’t much room once you’ve paid for your groceries and you’re packing your own bags. Alex, my Deaf son, was helping me – I was standing at the end of the belt and he was moving things closer to me while standing in the lane where we came out after paying. There was a woman there with a cart who had just paid for her groceries. All she had was a cart full of cases of pop (soda, for those of you in the U.S.). When I turned, after she had raised her voice (I didn’t know she was there) she was saying to Alex that she just needed to get out, that she didn’t have to pack anything, she would just very much appreciate it if we’d excuse her.

Normally an “excuse me” doesn’t require that much explanation, so it occurred to me that she’d probably been saying it to Alex for a while. He had his back turned to her, so he didn’t know she was there. As she walked away, she looked at me and said, “Thank you very much for moving out of the way.” Waaay over the top, even for a Canadian. So I said, “Sorry he didn’t move right away, he’s Deaf.” Or I tried to say that, but she cut me off: “No, no, no, no, I really appreciate it!”

Fuck you, sarcastic bitch.

I want to say I wish people wouldn’t judge, but I realize I’m judging her. Maybe she’d been having a really hard day? But does she need to take it out on us?

I always say that you can make someone’s day with a smile, no matter who they are. Even if they’re a stranger. You can also ruin someone’s day by being sarcastic and jumping to conclusions. Or rather jumping to conclusions and then being sarcastic.  Or maybe I’m just overreacting because I want to protect my son.

One way or another, be nice out there. And be patient.

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This post is brought to you by Stream of Consciousness Saturday. Check out the rules and join in here: https://lindaghill.com/2016/09/16/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-sept-1716/


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A #SoCS post about SoCS

When I started Stream of Consciousness Saturday, two and a half years ago, I did it because I wanted to write something on the weekends without having to think about it too much. For most people, the weekdays are the busiest and weekends are for relaxing. My situation is the opposite, having the kids home all day. So I’d sit and wrack my brain for a “good idea” of what to write and usually just get stressed while I watched my views plummet. (I’ve always paid attention to numbers, so the views on my blog were a natural obsession for me.)

The whole thing started at the mall, actually. I was sitting in the food court, eating my lunch alone, and wanted to write something. Anything. So I took out my trusty notebook and began. I came home later and transcribed it verbatim on my blog. It was a week or two later that I came up with the idea to let other people in on the fun. And it has been fun, hasn’t it? (This is starting to sound doomed – it’s not.) (Also, I’m going to end another paragraph with brackets.)

I think the whole love affair I have with stream of consciousness writing stems from the way I write fiction best. I’m a pantser, which means I don’t plot. I write by the seat of my pants. It’s a lot like stream of consciousness, because you never know where it’s going. The difference is, when writing fiction you’re in someone else’s head. Someone you have gotten to know by writing backstories and by living with them through their trials and tribulations. Their struggles and their joys. Once I know them well, they carry my mind along… much like my mind carries me along to write what I’m writing now. It’s so completely natural, and that’s what I enjoy about it the most when I read all of your SoCS posts. It’s a lovely, unfiltered glimpse that allows us all to really see how we connect with one another. Because we’re really all the same inside.

Hey! I managed to write a paragraph with no brackets! (So where was I?) (See what I did there?)

I suppose to go back to the beginning, I just wanted to say I still and will probably always appreciate the concept of stream of consciousness writing. It’s an escape inwards. Like an explosion of bodily fluids but without the mess. Fingertip sweat. I should probably shut up now.

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This post is brought to you by (if you haven’t figured it out by now) Stream of Consciousness Saturday. Click the link and join in the fun today! https://lindaghill.com/2016/09/09/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-sept-1016/


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Of Rainbows, Unicorns and Happily Ever After

I really needed this today – been feeling a bit sorry for myself lately. I thought I’d share it with you all, in case you’re in need of it too.
Note: Comments closed here. Please click on the original post to comment.

suzjones's avatarIt Goes On

Don’t you just wish that my title summed up life?
I know I do and more often than I care to admit.
Yet if there is one thing that I have learned over the past months and weeks is that any ‘happily ever after’ is entirely up to me!
That’s right.
Me!!!!!
Kinda puts a lot of responsibility on a gal you know?
Having the sole responsibility for my own happiness is a big deal.

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#SoCS – Your Servant

Ah, the things we do for our kids. I drove to Ottawa today for our (my son, Chris, and I) other annual museum pilgrimage. This one is a tour of four different museums – today was the History museum (in Gatineau, where above-mentioned son was born) and the War museum. It’s doubtful I’d ever have visited either of them on my own, but now, after having been to each at least half a dozen times, they feel like home. I seem to discover something new each year – the War museum never fails to humble.

The back of Canada's Parliament buildings from across the river

The back of Canada’s Parliament buildings from across the river

Canadian Museum of History

Canadian Museum of History

Now I’m sitting in my own room, having procured a suite at the St. Paul University residence with two separate bedrooms and a kitchen for under $100. Not bad, eh? Apparently I snore, so my poor son doesn’t like to sleep in the same room as me. (Yes, this is how you know this is stream of consciousness. Normally I wouldn’t admit to such a thing, but no editing…)

Tomorrow we’ll visit the Agriculture and Food Museum (oooh, that might be nice) in lieu of the Science museum we usually go to but can’t because it’s closed. Then it will be on to the Nature museum. Another one I’ve been to, actually more times than the others, because I went there once on a field trip as well. Chris has probably been to them all a dozen times. But he’s Autistic, so he enjoys the repetition.

We got lost when we were looking for the hotel/residence. The street address doesn’t show up from the street – it’s tucked in behind the university and there is loads of construction as well. Chris began to freak out, so I went to one of the local businesses and asked where the place was. He keeps telling me he wants to come to Japan with me. I found today to be a perfect time to explain to him that I get lost often. In Canada, where I speak the language (and can even get by in French), it’s easy to ask for directions. In Japan… I walk around a lot, looking for things myself, even when I’m lost. I can’t imagine what it would be like, as anxious as I sometimes get when I can’t find where I’m supposed to go, having an Autistic 21 year old going through a conniption with me.

So yeah, that probably won’t happen. But the things we do for our kids.

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This has been a perfect example of not using the prompt other than in the title of a post for Stream of Consciousness Saturday. But that’s fair! Because the title prompted what came next. Feel free to follow this and all the other (lax) rules you’ll find here, for SoCS: https://lindaghill.com/2016/08/26/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-august-2716/