Life in progress


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Well, I Never!

Has the cashier in a grocery store ever commented on your purchases? It happens to me once in a while. It happened today, in fact. I had two loaves of bread and a can of salmon on the conveyor. As the cashier scanned them, she said, “Salmon sandwiches.”

“Yeah,” I replied. But then I got to thinking.

What if I’d been buying, say, mouthwash: might she have asked, “Did you forget the garlic bread”?

What about beans: “Better be sleeping alone tonight!”

Toilet paper? “I love this one! So soft.”

Condoms? “Someone’s getting lucky!”

A cucumber? …okay, never mind. You get the picture. Whether you want it or not.

So yeah, it’s probably just my imagination running away with me as usual, but having the cashier comment on my food kinda weirds me out.


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183. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Note: Strong language

Friday, March 2nd, 7:00pm
Ethyl (and Jade)

 

Ethyl sits at the window. Jade takes the seat beside her.

Ethyl: (under her breath) Pfft.

Jade turns and smiles tentatively.

Ethyl: (under her breath) Slut.

Jade: I beg your pardon?

Ethyl: (under her breath) Tart.

Jade: If you’ve got something to say, say it.

Ethyl: You look like a whore.

Jade: How … dare you!

Ethyl: You’re off to get paid for a man’s pleasure, aren’t you? Look at the way you’re dressed.

Jade: It’s a skirt and blouse! I’m going to visit my mom.

Ethyl: Liar!

Jade: (stands) Lady, you need to keep your thoughts to yourself.

Ethyl: (smiles sweetly) Just kidding.

Jade: (sits and crosses her arms) Hmph.

Ethyl: (under her breath) Cocksucker.

 

Next stop: Saturday, March 3rd, 6:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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104. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Wednesday, December 13th, 5:00pm
Crystal and Jasmine

 

Crystal: So, like, there’s this woman, right? And she comes in to get her hair cut, and she wearing this sweater that’s, like, a man’s or something …

Jasmine: Oh my God! Into your place?

Crystal: Right? And so I start asking her the usual questions, like do you have kids … or have you always lived in town … and like, what are your upcoming plans …

Jasmine: Yeah, yeah …

Crystal: And she’s, like, fifty or something, and she’s wearing absolutely zero makeup, and I was expecting her to say somethin’ like, well I’m going Christmas shopping for the grandkids … you know …

Jasmine: Uh huh …

Crystal: And then she’s like, “Oh, I’m going to Japan in a couple of days,” and I’m like, what?

Jasmine: No. Way.

Crystal: I know, right? It was all I could do not to blurt it out! Like, totally seriously, this woman doesn’t look like she has two cents to rub together, and she’s going to Japan and, get this: you haven’t even heard the best part …

Jasmine: What? What?

Crystal: She told me … Get this. I asked her why she’s going, and she told me she’s going to Tokyo JUST to SEE a CONCERT

Jasmine: OH. MY. GOD. You have got to be kidding.

Crystal: I’m dead serious. Can you believe it?

Jasmine: No way.

Crystal: I know …

 

(Written three years ago and based on a true story – at least judging by the look on my hairdresser’s face.)

Next stop: Thursday, December 14th, 6:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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#SoCS – Screen

“Experience is the screen through which we see the world.” ~ Linda G. Hill

I just came up with that. Someone else probably has as well, but just in case I’m not subconsciously plagiarizing it, I’ll leave it up there all by itself.

It’s always been true, I think. The whole nature vs. nurture thing may be something we’ll never all agree on – I believe there’s a balance there somewhere. There’s no doubt our experiences shape us, whether to turn us into what we’ve seen or give us the determination to be the opposite. Either way, our experiences colour how we perceive things, how we judge things to be true or false, comforting or scary, acceptable or not.

If the above statement has always been true, isn’t it more literally true now? When almost all we see of the world is through a physical screen, compounded by opinions that read as facts, and facts that are difficult to believe, it’s no wonder we’re often confused. Or maybe I just speak for myself.

With the world on the brink of change (if my screen is to be believed), we are witnessing history, close up and from afar at the same time. Will we always have this medium to express our thoughts and connect with one another? Loss of this is what I fear the most.

Note: I looked up my “quote” – this is the closest I came to it: https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/483575-we-don-t-see-the-world-as-it-is-we-see So I’m sticking quotation marks around it and calling it mine. I’ll await the claim of whomever beat me to it.

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This post is part of Stream of Consciousness Saturday. Click the following link to join in: https://lindaghill.com/2016/10/14/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-oct-1516/


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Angriest, a #SoCS Rant (with swear words and everything)

There are a few things that annoy me about people, but what gets me angriest is when people get annoyed at my kids. This rant is brought on by a trip to the grocery store earlier today and a woman behind us in line. There isn’t much room once you’ve paid for your groceries and you’re packing your own bags. Alex, my Deaf son, was helping me – I was standing at the end of the belt and he was moving things closer to me while standing in the lane where we came out after paying. There was a woman there with a cart who had just paid for her groceries. All she had was a cart full of cases of pop (soda, for those of you in the U.S.). When I turned, after she had raised her voice (I didn’t know she was there) she was saying to Alex that she just needed to get out, that she didn’t have to pack anything, she would just very much appreciate it if we’d excuse her.

Normally an “excuse me” doesn’t require that much explanation, so it occurred to me that she’d probably been saying it to Alex for a while. He had his back turned to her, so he didn’t know she was there. As she walked away, she looked at me and said, “Thank you very much for moving out of the way.” Waaay over the top, even for a Canadian. So I said, “Sorry he didn’t move right away, he’s Deaf.” Or I tried to say that, but she cut me off: “No, no, no, no, I really appreciate it!”

Fuck you, sarcastic bitch.

I want to say I wish people wouldn’t judge, but I realize I’m judging her. Maybe she’d been having a really hard day? But does she need to take it out on us?

I always say that you can make someone’s day with a smile, no matter who they are. Even if they’re a stranger. You can also ruin someone’s day by being sarcastic and jumping to conclusions. Or rather jumping to conclusions and then being sarcastic.  Or maybe I’m just overreacting because I want to protect my son.

One way or another, be nice out there. And be patient.

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This post is brought to you by Stream of Consciousness Saturday. Check out the rules and join in here: https://lindaghill.com/2016/09/16/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-sept-1716/


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L is for Lowly

I am but a lowly member of society. Lower than a proletariat – I’m not even working-class. I’ve been judged for the way I look, the way I dress… or at least I suppose that is why I was judged. I resemble a plebe.

It was about 21 years ago. I’d just moved into my own house, miles away from where my mother was trying to sell hers so that she could be closer to me. Since I was already in the area, I was shopping around new subdivisions for her. For a while we were considering sharing a home–a big one–so I went to my local bank manager to see what I could get pre-approved for. He gave me a number and so out I went.

I walked into one sales office and was looking over floor plans. There were two sales people, a man and a woman; both smiled at me and let me look, which was fine I supposed. Then a couple walked in. Both sales people pounced. Now here was a sale!! I waited patiently for the other potential customers to leave and then finally I guess the sales lady got tired of seeing me there (or assumed if she didn’t talk to me I’d never leave – I might even scare away real buyers!) and came over to ask if she could help me.

“This one,” I said, pointing.

“Yes, that’s a very nice house. The second largest.” She smiled, humoring me.

“I’m thinking about buying one. Can I see your lot layout?”

She stared at me.

“I’ve been pre-approved for $250,000…”

Never seen anyone move so fast in my life.

I took the information and left. I didn’t go back.

Among the synonyms for lowly, are average, dutiful, humble, modest, and unpretentious.

There are also these: common, inferior, poor, submissive, and unassuming. Ah, how ironic.