Life in progress


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360. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Sunday, August 26th, 1:00pm
Valhallah (and Simon)

 

Valhallah sits at the window. Simon takes the seat beside her.

Valhallah: I’m looking particularly beautiful today, don’t you think?

Simon: Absolutely edible.

Valhallah: Oooh, I like you.

Simon: I could take you places.

Valhallah: Yeah? Like where?

Simon: I can seriously see you in Greece.

Valhallah: Really? That would cost an arm and a leg!

Simon: (chuckles) Oh, at least.

 

Next stop: Monday, August 27th, 5:00pm

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355. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Tuesday, August 21st, 5:00 6:00pm
Simon (and Sofia)

 

Simon sits at the window. Sofia takes the seat beside him.

Sofia: I’m sitting here because there’s somebody at the back of the bus I don’t like.

Simon: Oh really?

Sofia: It’s more like I don’t understand her. All she talks about is guys with beards. She absolutely loves guys with beards. Can’t get enough of guys with beards. I wouldn’t mind, but she’s obsessed. And I don’t know – she’s just got really bad taste.

Simon: (turns) Which one is she?

Sofia: Doesn’t matter. She wouldn’t like you. You’re clean shaven.

Simon: Oh, I don’t care if she likes me. I just want to see how bad she tastes.

 

Next stop: Wednesday, August 22nd, 5:00pm

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348. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Tuesday, August 14th, 6:00pm
Simon (and Wendy)

 

Simon sits at the window. Wendy takes the seat beside him.

Simon: Can I ask you a strange question?

Wendy: Sure.

Simon: If you were going to be executed but first they had to give you anything at all you wanted to eat, what would you order as your last meal?

Wendy: Hmmm … I think I’d order an endless buffet. Then I could eat myself to death before they got their hands on me.

Simon: That’s brilliant! I can add that to mine.

Wendy: What do you mean?

Simon: Well, I was going to order a fresh human as my last meal. But a whole buffet of them? I’d be in heaven before I even got there!

Wendy: That’s sick!

Simon: Do you really think so?

Wendy: Absolutely!

Simon: (thinks for a moment) Maybe I should stick with just one then.

 

Next stop: Wednesday, August 15th, 7:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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305. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Monday, July 2nd, 5:00pm
Simon (and Murray)

 

Simon sits at the window. Murray takes the seat beside him.

Murray: Excuse me, can I interest you in a potato?

Simon: I don’t eat vegetation.

Murray: That’s odd … you only eat meat?

Simon: Yes. I prefer organs, actually. A slice of liver with a nice Chianti, for instance.

Murray: So no fava beans?

Simon: It’s where our similarity ends.

Murray changes seats.

 

Next stop: Tuesday, July 3rd, 5:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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287. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Thursday, June 14th, 1:00pm
Simon (and Verne)

 

Simon sits at the window. Verne takes the seat beside him, grocery bag in hand.

Verne: (to bag, soothingly) That’s a nice chicken. (looks sideways at Simon and turns back to bag) I’m going to take you home and eat you all up. (looks sideways at Simon)

Simon smiles.

Verne: (to Simon) What? Haven’t you ever seen anyone talk to their food?

Simon: No, it’s okay! I talk to my food all the time.

Verne: Do you like the wings too?

Simon: (shakes head) I’m more of a leg man, myself. Maybe the occasional finger.

Verne: Ugh. I hate chicken fingers.

Simon: Me too.

Verne: And fish fingers.

Simon: (smiles) Me too.

Verne changes seats.

 

Next stop: Friday, June 15th, 9:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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261. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Saturday, May 19th, 8:00pm
Simon (and Lily)

 

Simon sits at the window. Lily takes the seat beside him.

Lily: Hey, good lookin’.

Simon: (smiles) Well, hello there.

Lily: Nice night to be out on the prowl.

Simon: It is, indeed.

Lily: Wanna go out for a bite?

Simon: Funny you should ask that. I was going to say I’d like to eat you. Whole.

Lily: (grins widely, showing a mouthful of fake fangs) Beauty.

 

Next stop: Sunday, May 20th, 11:00am

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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248. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Sunday, May 6th, 1:00pm
Red (and Simon)

 

Red sits at the window. Simon takes the seat beside her.

Simon: Hi.

Red: Hi.

Simon: Nice basket. You look like Little Red Riding Hood.

Red: Who’s that?

Simon: Never mind. You going to your grandma’s house?

Red: How did you know?

Simon: Wild guess.

Red: I went yesterday, but I forgot the bread.

Simon: You really want to take the chance, going back twice in two days?

Red: What do I look like, a chicken?

Simon: I could go for some white meat.

Red shakes her head and turns to the window.

Simon: I’m not averse to a leg …

Red: (turns back) Anyone ever told you you’ve got a big mouth?

Simon: (smiles) All the better, my dear.

 

Next stop: Monday, May 7th, 1:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.