Life in progress


Leave a comment

352. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Saturday, August 18th, 9:00pm
Edward (and Bella)

 

Edward sits at the window. Bella boards the bus.

Bella: (as she approaches) Oh God, you’re back already?

Edward: Just to show you something. Then I’m gone.

Bella: What is it?

Edward: Sit down and I’ll show you.

Bella sits beside him.

Edward: (pulls envelope out of his pocket) My ticket. I’m leaving tonight for Transylvania. To find my ancestors.

Bella: Your family came from … wait. You know you’re not actually a vampire. And even if you were, you’re not related to Vlad the Impaler.

Edward: (sighs) I am a vampire and I am descended from Vlad.

Bella laughs.

Edward: You don’t believe me.

Bella: Of course not.

Edward: Then how do you explain my escape from prison?

Bella: I don’t know – a friend who eats flies?

Edward: No! I turned into smoke.

Bella: Right. Okay then. Let me see you do it now.

Edward: I can’t. I … wouldn’t want to attract attention to you.

Bella: To me? (laughs again)

Edward: You hurt me to the quick, Bella. But never mind. I will go to Transylvania and return with riches, and then you’ll not be able to deny me.

Bella: Watch me.

Edward: You’ll see.

Bella: Right.

Edward: Now, if you’ll excuse me.

Bella waits.

Edward: I’d like to get off the bus now.

Bella: You’re not going to turn into a bat and fly out the window?

Edward: The windows don’t open.

Bella: (stands) Have a nice life, Edward.

Edward: I will Bella. When you’re finally in it for good.

Edward exits the bus.

 

Next stop: Sunday, August 19th, 5:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


1 Comment

261. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Saturday, May 19th, 8:00pm
Simon (and Lily)

 

Simon sits at the window. Lily takes the seat beside him.

Lily: Hey, good lookin’.

Simon: (smiles) Well, hello there.

Lily: Nice night to be out on the prowl.

Simon: It is, indeed.

Lily: Wanna go out for a bite?

Simon: Funny you should ask that. I was going to say I’d like to eat you. Whole.

Lily: (grins widely, showing a mouthful of fake fangs) Beauty.

 

Next stop: Sunday, May 20th, 11:00am

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


4 Comments

250. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Tuesday, May 8th, 6:00pm
Red (and Phil)

 

Red sits at the window. Phil takes the seat beside her: he is out of breath.

Red: Are you okay?

Phil: Yeah. I almost missed the damned bus. (does a double take) … I mean, the darned bus.

Red: I wish I had. I’m really starting to hate taking the bus. I used to have a car to go to my grandma’s house. But since it broke down, I’m having to deliver the goodies (holds up basket) by bus and by foot. Yesterday I almost got eaten!

Phil: (stares) You hate the bus too … Wait, did you say eaten?

Red: Yeah. A guy came out of the bushes and tried to bite my neck. He was wearing all this glittery stuff. Kept calling me Bell-something. I might not even be here if some crazy brunette hadn’t shown up and chased him away with a pointy stick.

Phil: That doesn’t sound very safe. What do you say to getting off the bus with me? I’m just going to get my car from the shop. I can drive you to your grandma’s house.

Red: (sighs in relief and grins widely) Oh, could you?

Phil: I’d drive you there every night …

Red takes his hand. They get off the bus together.

 

Next stop: Wednesday, May 9th, 5:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


3 Comments

236. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Note: Strong language

Tuesday, April 24th, 6:00pm
Drommen (and Andrea)

 

Drommen sits at the window. Andrea takes the seat beside him.

Drommen: Hey, how are you?

Andrea: Oh, you know.

Drommen: Guy trouble?

Andrea: Yeah, well. Eddie, like, caught up with me the other day? Said he’s got a new job.

Drommen: Really?

Andrea: (nods) He gave me this, like, sob story about not having enough money to live on. He was trying to convince me to give him a loan.

Drommen: And you said no of course.

Andrea: (sighs) Yeah.

Drommen: Then why so fed up?

Andrea: Well, you know how I, like, pinned him to a tree a couple of weeks ago?

Drommen: (laughs) That was a good one.

Andrea: Turns out he lost his teeth. He talked me into getting him a new pair. Figured it was the least I could do.

Drommen: So fang-boy’s back in business then.

Andrea: Apparently he needed them for his new job, or some such bullshit.

Drommen: So he can suck the life out of everyone’s enjoyment in the workplace?

Andrea: Probably.

 

Next stop: Wednesday, April 25th, 5:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


1 Comment

230. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Note: Strong language

Wednesday, April 18th, 8:00pm
Mr. Splindle and Edward

 

Mr. Splindle: So what were you doing before, Edward?

Edward: I worked for a man … er … I was an apprentice of sorts.

Mr. Splindle: That idea died, did it?

Edward: It dyed the wrong colour completely.

Mr. Splindle: And what do you like to do for fun?

Edward: Do you mean what are my hobbies?

Mr. Splindle: No! No, not at all. This isn’t an interview, son! It’s what you might call a recruitment! No, I just want to know what sorts of things might be distracting you from our little venture.

Edward: Well, I like to look at girls.

Mr. Splindle: So you like pussy, eh son? A man after my own heart.

Edward: (frowning) That’s not what I said.

Mr. Splindle: What are you talking about then, lad?

Edward: I like to look at girls, not cats.

Mr. Splindle regards him for a moment.

Edward: And I don’t like dogs.

Mr. Splindle: (pats him on the knee and smiles) Son, the cats we’re going to see tonight’ll have you howling like a dog at the moon.

 

Next stop: Thursday, April 19th, 5:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


Leave a comment

215. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Tuesday, April 3rd, 8:00am
Michael (and Joanna)

 

Michael sits at the window reading the newspaper. Joanna takes the seat beside him.

Michael: This is incredible.

Joanna: What is?

Michael: This. (shows her a picture in the newspaper) Did you hear about it?

Joanna: (grimaces) What the hell is that even a picture of?

Michael: (points) It’s a guy.

Joanna: In a tree? What, is he stuck?

Michael: Yeah. He was found hanging from a limb, and … Here, I’ll just read it: “On Sunday morning, an east-end resident called police when she heard loud shrieking noises coming from her back yard shortly after she let her dog out. Before the police arrived, she snapped a picture of a man hanging from her century old oak, pinned there by his collar by a short wooden stake. It wasn’t until police arrived, however, that she found the man’s biggest complaint wasn’t the hanging, but the fact that he had lost his plastic vampire fangs. The dog was later discovered wearing an extra-toothy grin.”

Joanna: (shakes head) Takes all kinds I guess.

 

Next stop: Wednesday, April 4th, 4:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


Leave a comment

212. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Saturday, March 31, 8:00pm
Edward (and Andrea)

 

Edward sits at the window. Andrea takes the seat beside him.

Andrea: Hi, honey.

Edward: No …

Andrea: Do you like it?

Edward: Noooo …

Andrea: But … Lacey promised me you’d like it anyway. We tried, but …

Edward: It’s pink. Your hair is pink.

Andrea: Well I like it. Even though it was an accident. Should I try again? ‘Coz I can, like, try again next week.

Edward: (covers his face with his hands and laments) It’s too late. It’s too late!!

Andrea: Does … that mean we’re not, like, going to the party anymore?

Edward: You idiot! Of course we’re not going to a party. We were never going to a party!

Andrea: (reaches into her bag and pulls out a wooden stake) Damned right, sucka!!

Edward leaps over her and runs for the door. Andrea chases him off the bus.

 

Next stop: Sunday, April 1st, 4:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.