Hillary sits at the window. Sean takes the seat beside her.
Sean: So how’d it go with your lover boy the other night?
Hillary: I don’t know what you’re talking about.
Sean: He said no, didn’t he.
Hillary: I still don’t know what you’re talking about.
Sean: Did he show you his “thing”? (chuckles)
Hillary turns to the window, ignoring him.
Sean: I hear he likes showing it off.
Hillary continues to ignore him.
Sean: What’s his stupid name again?
Hillary:(snapping at him) It’s Jake, and it’s none of your business!
Sean: He said no. I knew it!
Hillary: Go fuck yourself.
Sean: I think you’re the one who needs the fu…
Hillary: FUCK OFF!
Sean: Oooh, touchy! All right. Fine. I’ll back off. (looks to the front of the bus) Hey, look who’s getting on!
Hillary: (sits up straight and sees a mother and daughter: strangers, boarding the bus) Fuck off. (she pushes him out of the seat as he doubles up laughing) Asshole.
Andrea: So my mom’s got this new boyfriend, right?
Lacey: Again?
Andrea: What do you mean, again? She hasn’t had one in, like, a month. Anyways, he comes over last night, and he’s, like, completely shitfaced, right?
Lacey: No!
Andrea: So yeah, so he’s, like, staggering all over the place, and he just got out of his car. He comes in and he says to me, “You know, you’re even better-looking than your mom.” And I’m like, “EW, how can you say that with my mom just standing there?”
Lacey: No way!
Andrea: Exactly, right? But my mom just laughed it off. She wanted to go to this restaurant where they had, like, this reservation?
Lacey: That’s …
Andrea: Incredible, right? My mom’s like such a crazy bitch.
Lacey: She really is!
Andrea: Well she’s not THAT crazy. At least she drove.
Andrea: So you’ll never guess what I heard at work.
Lacey: What?
Andrea: Christmas music. One fucking day after Hallowe’en. Can you believe it?
Lacey: No way!
Andrea: I wouldn’t have even noticed it if this guy hadn’t been whistling to it when he came in.
Lacey: Like he …
Andrea: … liked it or something. Exactly! I mean, who likes Christmas music the day after Hallowe’en? Like, we haven’t even got all the decorations down. But at least the guy was hot.
Lacey:Pfft. Too bad.
Andrea: What do you mean “too bad”? (shrugs) I flirted with him a bit.
Lacey: No!
Andrea: Yep. And I asked him out. We’re getting together next week.
Lacey: Seriously? What are you gonna do if …
Andrea: If he starts whistling Christmas music again? What do you think? Dump his ass!
Does everyone have that one Facebook friend who, every time she has her picture taken with another person, they have look on their face like she’s taking them hostage? Or am I the only one with scary friends?
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Anyone who is my friend, knows to be patient. I can go for years without talking to people, but that doesn’t mean, in my mind at least, that the friendship no longer exists.
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