Linda G. Hill

Life in progress


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310. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Saturday, July 7th, 9:00pm
Bella and Alice (and Edward)

 

Bella: I know he’s gonna be there tonight. I just know it.

Edward: (pops up in the seat behind them, making them jump) You mean me? I’m here.

Bella: No, I don’t mean you. And if you do that again, I swear…

Edward: Don’t swear, Bella. It doesn’t become you.

Alice: If you have to know, she means a guy that…

Bella: (interrupts) I’m in love with. And he’s in love with me. So go blow it out your ear.

Edward: Blow what out my ear? (shakes head)  I’m here to give you one last chance, Bella. Be with me. You know you want to.

Bella: As much as I’m tempted I think I’ll pass. What, you got other options?

Edward: I’m considering leaving town.

Bella: No!

Edward: You’re sad. I’m sorry. All you have to do is agree to marry me, and I’ll take you with me.

Bella: I’ll survive.

Alice: Why the change of plans? As if I really want to know.

Edward: There’s a woman stalking me. I believe she means to try to kill me.

Alice: (under her breath) Well there’s an idea.

Edward: She approached me last night and pretended to be you, my Bella. You but changed to be like me. A vampire. I could smell her a mile off.

Bella: You know, you’re kind of ripe yourself.

Edward: So what do you say, Bella? Will you come with me? It’s really not safe here.

Bella: I’ll be fine. Go without me.

Edward: Parting is such sweet sorrow. Good-bye then my love.

Edward stands and waits for the next bus stop.

Alice: Good riddance.

Edward stares at Bella.

Bella: You’re not going to hypnotize me into going with you.

Alice: (to Edward) Seriously?

Edward: Fine then! (gets off the bus)

Bella: (reaches out toward the door) Oh no! He’s really gone!

Bella and Alice look at each other and crack up laughing.

 

Next stop: Sunday, July 8th, 11:00am

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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274. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Note: Strong language

Friday, June 1st, 9:00pm
Bella and Alice (and Edward)

 

Bella: You know who we haven’t seen in a while?

Alice: Who?

Bella: Edward.

Edward: (pops up in the seat behind, making Bella and Alice jump) Hello!

Alice: Speak of the devil.

Edward: (to Bella) You conjured?

Bella: Now that you’re here, you can go away.

Edward: I’ve missed you, Bella.

Alice: She hasn’t missed you.

Edward: (to Bella) I have a new job. (smiles, exposing fake fangs) I’m rich now.

Bella: Ooooh, that makes me want you even more!

Edward: It does?

Bella: No. Go away.

Edward: You hurt me to the core. But one day, my love, we’ll be together.

Alice: No you won’t.

Edward: (to Bella, whispering) Forever.

Bella: Look, idiot, you’re not getting the message. I. Don’t. Want. To. Date. You.

Edward: You don’t have to date me. Just be my bride.

Bella: Yeah, like that’s gonna happen.

Edward: It will. Mark my words.

Alice: I’ll mark your forehead with “loser” if you don’t fucking get lost.

Edward: (smiles) You’ll see me again. Soon.

Edward gets off the bus.

Bella: Think he’s ever going to give up?

Alice: (shrugs) Guys like that always do eventually.

 

Next stop: Saturday, June 2nd, 8:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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191. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Note: Strong language

Saturday, March 10th, 9:00pm
Bella and Alice (and Lily)

 

Bella: God, I hope we don’t see him tonight.

Alice: Which one?

Bella: Pfft, either of them. How do I keep picking such losers?

Alice: You didn’t exactly pick Edward.

Bella: But Edgar I did. What an asshole.

Alice: Maybe he didn’t just stand you up.

Bella: What are you saying, Edward got him and (hooks two fingers on each hand) “made him a vampire”?

Lily: (pops up behind their seat) Good evening, ladies.

Both jump.

Alice: What the hell do you want?

Lily: I just thought you’d want to know there’s a maniac on the loose.

Bella: Besides you?

Lily: (hisses) Yes, besides me. She’s been chasing Edward and I around with a stake. She wants to kill us. But we’ll get her first. No need to fear, ladies.

Alice: (wipes forehead) Phew! I was shaking in my boots.

Lily: I can smell sarcasm.

Bella: Wait a minute. Wasn’t I your mortal enemy a few weeks back?

Lily: This one’s more of a threat. I’ll deal with you later. Myself.

Alice: (to Bella) I smell a shit stain. Do you smell a shit stain?

Bella: I thought it was garlic.

Lily hisses and heads for the door.

 

Next stop: Sunday, March 11th, 10:00am

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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161. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Thursday, February 8th, 7:00pm
Bella and Edgar (and Edward)

 

Edgar: It’s going to be great meeting your parents. Do you really think they’ll like me?

Bella: What’s not to like? You were the captain of the football team, which my dad is going to love.

Edgar: That was a couple of years ago though.

Bella: And now you’re an electrical engineer. (takes his arm and hugs it) Brains and strength.

Edgar: And your mom?

Bella: You know how to cook. She’ll be very impressed. (kisses him on the cheek)

Edgar: Thanks. I feel bett …

Edward: (popping up in the seat behind) Who’s this, Bella?

Bella: (rolling her eyes) He’s my boyfriend. What’s it to you?

Edward: He’s not meant for you. I am.

Bella: You’re crazy.

Edward: Crazy in love with you.

Edgar: (turns) Step aside, man.

Edward: I will not! Bella is the love of my life! My soulmate! There can only be one for h …

Edgar: (punches him in the nose) I said, step aside. The lady wants nothing to do with you.

Edward: (holding his nose and heading for the door) I’ll get you for this! You have no idea what it’s like to feel the wrath of a vampire! (gets off the bus)

Edgar: Do you think your friend Drommen will be happy with that little performance?

Bella: (smiling) Very. You really should come and meet my parents. For real.

Edgar: Don’t you think we should go out together first?

Bella: Is that an invitation?

Edgar: (smiles) Valentine’s is soon …

Bella: (smiles widely) Sounds like a date.

 

Next stop: Friday, February 9th, 9:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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143. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Note: Strong language

Sunday, January 21st, 12:01am
Lacey and Edward (and Bella and Alice)

 

Edward: (standing) Bella! Are you all right?

Bella: (stumbling down the aisle with Alice behind her) Oh fuck, not you again.

Lacey: (standing to look at Edward) Hey, I know you. You’re the guy Andrea’s in love with. I recognize your fake fangs.

Alice: (slides into the seat across the aisle, beside Bella. To Edward:) You. Are such. A slut.

Edward: I am not. I love you, Bella.

Lacey: That’s what you said to my friend on New Year’s Eve.

Bella: What about that other girl? You know, that skank you were with before?

Edward: Lily is NOT a skank. She’s a nice vampire.

Alice: (snarling) If I wa’n’t so drunk, I’d fuck you up myself.

Edward: Bella, they mean nothing to me. It’s you I love. You’re my soulmate.

Lacey: (steps past him) You make me sick.

Edward: Tell Andrea I’m sorry. I never meant to hurt her.

Lacey: (mumbling) She might hurt you. (walks to the back of the bus)

Edward: Bella, you must let me take you home. You can’t make it alone.

Alice: She’s not alone. She’s got me, asshole.

Edward: You’re in no shape to take care of my mate for life.

Bella: (bursts out laughing) Mate for life? GET a fucking life!

Edward: I can’t have a life. I’ve been undead for 50 years.

Alice: (to Bella) Does that mean we can’t kill him?

Bella: I think so. Oh! Oh! Where’s my garlic?

Both roll in their seats laughing. Edward exits the bus, dejected.

 

Next stop: Monday, September 3rd, 3:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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142. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Saturday, January 20th, 11:58pm
Lacey (and Edward) (and Bella)

 

Lacey sits at the window. Edward takes the seat beside her.

Edward: (checks watch) I’m gonna wait ’til the midnight hour.

Lacey: Beg pardon?

Edward: That’s when my love comes tumbling down.

Lacey: (shakes her head) What?

Edward: I’m gonna wait ’til the midnight hour.

Lacey snorts and turns her back to the window.

The bus stops and Bella gets on. Drunk, she trips up the stairs.

Edward: (checks watch and shows it to Lacey) See?

 

Next stop: Sunday, January 21st, 12:01am

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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128. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Saturday, January 6th, 5:00pm
Drommen (and Bella and Hillary)

 

Drommen sits at the window. Bella takes the seat beside him.

Bella: There you are!

Drommen: (glances at her) Hi.

Bella: Where have you been?

Drommen: Around.

Bella: Well you’ve missed a lot. Edward is still after me and now his new girlfriend wants to scratch my eyes out.

Drommen: Hmm.

Bella: Do you think you can help out?

Drommen: I don’t know what I can … (looks up the aisle) Oh God.

Hillary: (approaches and sits behind Drommen and Bella) Hey, there you are!

Drommen: (unenthusiastically) Here I am.

Hillary: You should know that flasher guy just won’t give up. I keep hearing about him.

Drommen: That’s too bad.

Hillary: Aren’t you going to do anything about it? I thought you considered this “your bus.”

Drommen: Let the cops look after it. They’re around.

Bella: What’s gotten into you?

Hillary: (frowning) Yeah. Are you okay?

Drommen: I’ve got personal stuff going on.

Bella and Hillary stare at him.

Drommen: I’ll see what I can do.

Bella: Thanks Drommen.

Drommen turns to look at Hillary. Hillary smiles at him.

 

Next stop: Sunday, January 7th, 3:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.