Life in progress

Tag Archives: Humor


by 32 Comments

Speaking of Masochism

Why do I set such high goals for myself? Okay yes, it feels great when I achieve them, and usually I do because I don’t like giving up on a challenge I set for myself. But the downside is that I end up getting stressed when I have too many things to do.

The latest goal of course is NaBloPoMo – write a post every day during the month of November. Together with Nano Poblano which gives me the extra challenge to make my posts spicy, I’m thinking by the end of the month my posts will be unreadable garbles of swear words. That should be fun!

Yet there’s something extra I’m contemplating to drive myself crazy reach for, and that is to extend my Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right series to 365. An entire year. I’m working on getting ahead of myself to cover the period in December when I won’t be around. They’re already scheduled a day or two in advance, so what’s two weeks? Nuthin’! My eventual goal with the series is to turn it into a calendar. I’m not sure exactly how that would work as an e-pub, but I’m sure I can figure something out. The idea came up a while ago, and I spoke to another blogger about possibly animating it, but that sorta fizzled out into nothing. So far. I should re-visit the idea and see if there’s any interest, though the 365th episode is still 300 away from being completed.

Any thoughts? Anyone who’s reading it think it might be a good idea? Click here for a link to one of the scenes that stands alone (meaning it has no back-story nor any follow-up so far) if you’ve never read one. You may just be amused.


by 46 Comments

Random-after-a-glass-of-wine-type-Team-Pepper-post

Well this should be interesting.

First off, what the hell is going on with WordPress today? I woke up and this blog’s “best ever” day has gone up by nine views, and my fiction blog’s has gone down by four. Has this happened to anyone else or are they just screwing with me?

Second, I really am going to finish replying to all my comments soon. Tomorrow, if all goes well. But when does it ever? Can anyone answer me this question?

Third, I need another glass of wine.

Fourth, … oh yeah! Another WTF WordPress. I scheduled my 63rd Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right post for 11am this morning but it went live at 10. Did WordPress not get the memo that the time changed last night? Was it only Canada that changed? I’m confuddled.

Fifth, what do I do with all these Hallowe’en candies?

Sixth, if anyone can answer the above questions to my satisfaction and (as always) with humour, you get a point. Extra points if you send me a bottle of wine.

Go!


by 50 Comments

One-Liner Wednesday – Eh?

From: https://www.facebook.com/alan.driskell.1?fref=photo – Carried forward by George Takei on Facebook

Canadian Borg

Translation: For assimilation in French, please press “2.”

__________________________________________________________________________________________

Anyone who would like to try it out, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a ping back, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday, if you see a ping back from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Make it either funny or inspirational.

Have fun!


by 36 Comments

One-Liner Wednesday – One Filament Short of a Lightbulb

onefilamentshort

I got a few strange looks from the other customers in the store when I took this picture but it was too good to pass up.

__________________________________________________________________________________________

Anyone who would like to try it out, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a ping back, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday, if you see a ping back from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Make it either funny or inspirational.

Have fun!

 


by 54 Comments

How Do You Do Tired?

Now that I’ve finally caught up on my comments I’m allowing myself to post. Except… I can’t think of anything to write. Add the fact that I’m so tired that if tired was an animal, my tired would be an elephant. And it would be sitting on my lap. Do you have any idea what it’s like trying to type with an elephant on your lap? Ugh. He just farted.

This is how my family can tell when I’m exhausted. I either go hairy and bounce off the walls until someone placates me with either a cup of coffee or a glass of wine (depending on what time of the day it is… though if I’m honest I’ll take the wine any time) or I get creatively silly.

How ’bout you? Do you scream everyone around you into complete jelly-bowls of submission when you’re tired? Do you giggle until your insides hurt and your bloodshot eyes are ready to walk up the stairs to bed without you? How do your loved-ones know you’re tired?


by 32 Comments

One-Liner Wednesday – Amusing Nonsense

On being asked, “What do you get when you cross an elephant with a duck?” siriusbizinus answered
“Either a sticky duck or a disappointed elephant.”

I laughed so hard I had to make this today’s one-liner Wednesday. Thanks, siriusbizinus, for the laugh!

__________________________________________________________________________________________

Anyone who would like to try it out, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a ping back, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday, if you see a ping back from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Make it either funny or inspirational.

Have fun!


by 59 Comments

10 Random Whats

1. What makes it possible for spiders to crawl on ceilings?

2. What if vegetables were the best tasting thing on earth and chocolate tasted horrible?

3. What time is it when the rooster crows?

4. What do you get when you cross an elephant with a duck?

5. What if our noses were upside down? Would we drown when it rains?

6. What is the most magical thing ever?

7. What colour is the sky in your world?

8. What is shiny, has four wheels and flies in the summer?

9. What was the first word you ever read?

10. What makes the world go ’round?

As always, answer all the questions for all the points. Bonus points if you come up with your own “What” question – double the points if I can’t come up with a witty response.

 

 


by 22 Comments

One-Liner Wednesday – Dangerous Driving!

(Drawing you a mental picture.)

Sign I saw on the back of a transport trailer while going 105km/hr (65mph) down a North American highway:

<—-Passing side                             Suicide—->

__________________________________________________________________________________________

Anyone who would like to try it out, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a ping back, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday, if you see a ping back from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Make it either funny or inspirational.

Have fun!


by 49 Comments

Stream of Consciousness Saturday – Finding Flounder

Aside from the fact that I can’t usually find a thing I’m looking for in my house if I haven’t seen it in the previous two days (okay, that’s an exaggeration, but the frustration makes it feel that way) most of my lost things lately have been inside my own head.

Concentration. It’s what it all comes down to. Having a thousand things go through my head at once (disclaimer: this post will include many exaggerations. And by many I mean about a million or so.) is conductive to forgetting everything. For instance, twice this morning on my paper route I walked past a house I was supposed to deliver to because I have my novel in my head. A particular scene that I’ve been pondering… can’t remember now which one…

Too many people to take care of, (the last of which is ALWAYS me (exaggeration)) too little money to do all the crazy things my kids demand of me (i.e. taking the bus to the mall which costs $500 each way compared to driving the car which costs only pennies) (guess which one of those is an exaggeration. Right. The pennies one.), and where was I… Oh yeah. Not having enough time to write and edit, and read and CREATE! That’s gotta be the worst because it’s what keeps me sane. So I create in my head while I’m supposed to be doing other things. Like delivering the paper. And running red lights. And floundering around like a beached fish, gasping for air and dying… dying … dyin… dyi… d.

I’m such a drama queen this morning. Time to find some sense in it all.

 

Badge by: Doobster at Mindful Digressions

Badge by: Doobster at Mindful Digressions

This post is part of SoCS. For the prompt and everything you need to know to join in, click here! https://lindaghill.com/2014/10/03/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-october-414/


by 47 Comments

10 Random Whys

1. Why are people surprised when they get a groan instead of a laugh at the end of a joke? It’s called a PUNCHline after all.

2. Why can’t I kiss my own elbow?

3. Why are there so many fruit flies in the world when there’s nothing to eat them?

4. Why do the things that are so bad for us, taste so good?

5. Why must our faculties go to pot as we get older?

6. Why does a bottle of water cost more than the same amount of gasoline?

7. Why can’t we just all get along?

8. Why do we call flies flies, and yet there’s not a bug called a “walk”?

9. Why do men have such a hard time asking for directions?

10. Why are there not more hours in a day when we need them?

 

One point for every question you answer. Bonus points if you can come up with another “why” question for me to answer.

Aaand GO!