Life in progress


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244. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Wednesday, May 2nd, 6:00pm
The Grim Reaper (and The Darkness)

 

The Grim Reaper sits at the window with his scythe. The Darkness boards the bus and approaches.

The Grim Reaper: (looking up) Who do you think you are?

The Darkness: (conversationally) I am The Darkness.

The Grim Reaper: I’m afraid I’ll have to see some ID.

The Darkness pulls card from pocket and hands it to The Grim Reaper.

The Grim Reaper: (leans his scythe against the seat and takes the card. reading) Last name, Darkness, first name, The. I guess you want to see mine now.

The Darkness nods.

The Grim Reaper: (hands The Darkness back the card, picks up the scythe and exits the bus. mumbling) Damn it, Martha was right. I should have brought my wallet.

 

Next stop: Thursday, May 3rd, 5:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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240. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Saturday, April 28th, 7:00pm
Andrea (and Pat)

 

Andrea sits at the window. Pat takes the seat beside her.

Pat: Nice evening out.

Andrea: Yeah, not bad.

Pat: I was supposed to meet my girlfriend but she stood me up.

Andrea: That sucks.

Pat: Wanna go for a coffee?

Andrea: Nah, I’m good. I’m on my way home from work. Busy day, on my feet and all that. I just want to go home and put my feet up, ya know?

Pat: I give great foot rubs.

Andrea: Uh … no. I’m good, thanks.

 

Next stop: Sunday, April 29th, 9:00am

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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The Destroyer Strikes Again

Okay, I didn’t actually destroy the computers at Service Ontario (where we renew our licenses and health cards), but I didn’t seem to do them any favours.

If you read my bloated one-liner on Wednesday (here), you’ll know that whilst out at the mall, not one but two computers in the stores I visited crapped out while I was there. Apparently my reign of terror was not over. It happened again. Yesterday.

Both my son Chris and I needed to renew our health cards. So we went into the office and sat to wait our turn, as you do. We were called up to Desk #6 (there are 9) and the lady started filling out the paperwork. When she tried to take Chris’s picture, it didn’t work. The camera was fine, but the computer wouldn’t capture the image. So she sent us to Desk #3.

A nice lady helped us through the process and got Chris all set. Then it was my turn. As she was processing my paperwork, the computer started glitching.

“Oh no,” I said and then explained to her what had happened at the mall.

She waved it off good-naturedly and suggested we take my picture while the computer was doing its thing.

“I’ll try not to break your camera,” I said as I stepped in front of it.

The lady thought that was hilarious, and we laughed until I had to do the serious face for my photo. Then came her serious face when the picture didn’t work. Her computer crashed.

“Okay,” she said. “I’ll just pass you off to my colleague at Desk #4.”

The other lady with whom she shared a workspace and who hadn’t been busy for a while said that if her camera worked, it wasn’t me, it was the lady she worked with who broke the computer.

So I stood in front of the camera again and we laughed and laughed, and I got serious, and then we all got serious. It didn’t work. At this point, three out of nine computers weren’t working.

So the lady at Desk #4 asked us to have a seat while she called IT. While we sat there (right by the desk), a man passed us to go to Desk #2. A woman was following him so closely, that I thought they were together. The man approached the desk but the woman stood back.

“You just called me to this desk,” she said, confused. It was obvious the two weren’t together at this point.

“Oh,” said the man behind Desk #2. “Sorry, just take a seat and we’ll call you up next. It happens sometimes that the computer calls two people up at the same time. Must be a glitch.”

Shortly after that we went back to Desk #4 and I got my confirmation that my renewal had gone through offsite. The lady’s computer still wasn’t working, but they’d done it somehow through another office. Obviously one where I wasn’t physically present.

I’m afraid to go out again.