Life in progress


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#SoCS – Aggression

Aggression isn’t natural for me, but I find myself acting aggressively towards my keyboard. Why? Because the spacebar isn’t working properly. I have to hit it so hard every time I press it that typing is somewhat akin to playing drums in a death metal band.

Meanwhile, it’s probably due to a crumb that passively made it’s way under the key.

Die, motherf–!!

Yeah. So. That’s my day so far. 🙂

This short, pleasant post is brought to you by Stream of Consciousness Saturday. Care to join in on the fun? Just click the following link, where you’ll find the rules and many other posts in the comment section. 🙂 https://lindaghill.com/2018/04/06/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-april-7-18/

 


99 Comments

One-Liner Wednesday – Funny or Terrible?

I’m almost afraid to post this. I was at my Deaf son’s school, waiting outside with another mom (the doors were locked) for our kids to get out of basketball practice. We waited, and waited, until the time passed that practice should have been out. The doors are made of glass, so I walked over to see if they were still in the gym. They were. I was going to knock, but of course they couldn’t hear me. They’re Deaf. So I went back to the other mom to let her know what had happened, and the stupidest line I could have ever come up with came out of my mouth.

I see Deaf people.

IT WAS TRUE! Don’t shoot me.


If you would like to participate in this prompt, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a pingback, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post, and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, like Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a pingback from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Try to make it either funny or inspirational.

3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

4. Add our very cool badge to your post for extra exposure!

5. Have fun!

#1linerWeds badge by Dan Antion

 

 


21 Comments

Can’t Clap

My bedroom door sticks. Let’s get that bit of information out of the way to start with. It’s actually worse in the summer–it barely closes then. It’s a dream in the winter to close, but it’s starting to get bad again. Therefore, when I want to close it enough to keep the dog out of my room, I have to slam it to basically wedge it into the door frame.

Yesterday, in a hurry to get downstairs with a handful of change, I slammed the door with said handful of change, and you can guess what happened. I slammed the side of my hand into the door frame, full force. I thought I’d broken it. It bled profusely for a while, so now I’m left with a bump, a bruise, and probably a scab; I haven’t had the guts to take the bandage off yet to look. And it’s still hurts to touch it. I definitely can’t clap. (Yes, I went a loooong way to get that title.)

If it had happened, say, next Wednesday instead, I could have used Karma for Thursday the 12th, which would have been much more in line with the fact that I’m illegally tagging along on the A to Z Challenge this year. Apparently you can’t spell Karma with a “C.” It’s even more illegal than what I’m doing, and only Buddha knows what might have gotten stuck in the door jamb if I’d attempted it!

Future is past, in my world. It’s a rebirth thing. 😉

My hand. My poor, poor hand.

 

 


19 Comments

#SoCS – Bun food

It’s going to be a busy day for me, so I want to write this post before I do anything. Trouble is, I haven’t eaten breakfast yet–in perfect procrastinator fashion, I’ve put it off simply because I didn’t know what to write, which is ridiculous considering that’s the entire purpose of Stream of Consciousness Saturday: to just write when you have nothing to write. So anyway, where was I? Oh yeah.

I haven’t had breakfast. So I’m sitting here starving, trying to figure out what I can write about with “bun” in it without torturing myself. Here’s what I have to avoid, just so you have an idea what I’m going through:

Buns–my eldest son has taken to baking bread lately. He’s planning to bake some buns, from scratch, for our dinner tonight. Can’t talk about that.

Easter Bunny–that’s me. I have to go out today sometime and get chocolate eggs to hide for tomorrow morning.

Bunch of grapes–sitting in my fridge.  They’re going to go bad if I don’t eat them soon. Eating soon is definitely on my mind.

Bundt cakes–giant donuts that can be shared for dessert … or hidden somewhere in the back of the fridge to be consumed in secret after everyone else has gone to bed.

Bungalow–there we go! Something that doesn’t remind me of food. Unless you count the gingerbread house I built at Christmas. I wonder if it’s possible to build a two-storey gingerbread house? Yum.

Bungle–yep, that’s what I’m doing with this post if my goal is to forget about food.

Oh, who am I kidding? I’m going to have breakfast. Cheers with coffee!!

This strangely delicious post is brought to you by Stream of Consciousness Saturday. Click the link to find all the participating posts in the comment section, and join in yourself. It’s fun! https://lindaghill.com/2018/03/30/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-march-30-18/


37 Comments

One-Liner Wednesday – The F-Word

Last week, sitting in a restaurant beside a mother with two daughters, aged about five and eight years old, I overheard:

Five-year-old: I said the f-word by accident yesterday.

Eight-year-old: Which one?

Five: You know, the fword.

Eight: (whispers) Frozen?

Five: No, the one Mommy always says.

It was all I could do; 1, not to laugh (because we all know Frozen is a bad word); and 2, not to look at the mother and embarrass her.


If you would like to participate in this prompt, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a pingback, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post, and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, like Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a pingback from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Try to make it either funny or inspirational.

3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

4. Add our very cool badge to your post for extra exposure!

5. Have fun!

#1linerWeds badge by Dan Antion

 

 


57 Comments

One-Liner Wednesday – Report

Day Two of March Break has come to a successful conclusion: we are all still alive.

In other news, is it spring yet?

Asking for a friend.


If you would like to participate in this prompt, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a pingback, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post, and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, like Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a pingback from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Try to make it either funny or inspirational.

3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

4. Add our very cool badge to your post for extra exposure!

5. Have fun!

#1linerWeds badge by Dan Antion

 


15 Comments

#SoCS – Sofa, so good

Well, I was going to get loads of work done today. Work on my own novel, on the short story I’m writing to submit to the upcoming anthology by Transmundane Press, work on my editing website, and on the introduction I need to write for the St. Patrick’s Day anthology I edited. And what have I done so far? Your guess is as good as mine, but it wasn’t any of the above.

Thing is, I have been working all day. I must have, because I didn’t play a single computer game. I did do a final proofreading run-through on the St. Patty’s anthology. And my butt is square from sitting on the sofa all day, so I must have been on the laptop.

I do keep getting up to grab myself something from the fridge in hopes that when I get back, I’ll get something done. But it’s like there’s so much to do I’m not sure where to start, so I end up doing things like chatting on Facebook (I have to–it’s anthology work), or scrolling through the, like, 50 tabs I have open to see what’s new. Social media is my downfall. I admit it.

What else have I done today? I avoided wine. That’s gotta count for something, especially since Alex is on a rare weekend at his dad’s. I know, I say I “avoided” wine like it’s flying through the air, aiming at me. It’s not true. It’s actually tucked into a wine rack in the basement. All two dozen bottles … Mmm, wine.

BUT, I can still get some work done tonight, can’t I? It’s only … 11:06pm. Oh damn, the clocks go forward. It may as well be after midnight. Where does the time go?!? Alex will be home before I know it, and I won’t have any work done!! May as well give up and drink wine.

Oh look! There’s a bottle now! Better catch it.

This crazy post is brought to you by Stream of Consciousness Saturday. Find the prompt post here and read all the contributing blogs! https://lindaghill.com/2018/03/09/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-march-10-18/


57 Comments

One-Liner Wednesday – Misunderstandings

When your best friend spends five minutes explaining that it will take four people to put the cat on the back of the pickup truck and one person to bolt it down, and for five minutes you’re totally confused, only to figure out that he said “cap,” not “cat.”


If you would like to participate in this prompt, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a pingback, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post, and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, like Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a pingback from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Try to make it either funny or inspirational.

3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

4. Add our very cool badge to your post for extra exposure!

5. Have fun!

#1linerWeds badge by Dan Antion

 


60 Comments

One-Liner Wednesday – How I Roll

Once in a while I get a brilliant idea for a story–something that’s so mind-boggling, that I just KNOW it’s best-selling-novel material. I’ll be so excited that there’s NO WAY I’m going to forget this idea, but I write myself a little note, just to make sure.

Here’s one example, that’s been on my phone for almost a year:

I have no freakin’ clue what the story was going to be about.


If you would like to participate in this prompt, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a pingback, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post, and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, like Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a pingback from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Try to make it either funny or inspirational.

3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

4. Add our very cool badge to your post for extra exposure!

5. Have fun!

#1linerWeds badge by Dan Antion

 


39 Comments

One-Liner Wednesday – The Perfect Toy

My best friend, John, found the perfect toy for Winston, my beagle-bassett cross.

Toy bottles of wine, just like Mommy loves (though Mommy’s wine isn’t a toy … don’t touch Mommy’s wine!!)

With a picture of a Winston-like dog, with Winston’s name

Winston loves his wine!! (And Mommy loves hers too.)


If you would like to participate in this prompt, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a pingback, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post, and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.

NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, like Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.

As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a pingback from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.

Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”

The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Try to make it either funny or inspirational.

3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

4. Add our very cool badge to your post for extra exposure!

5. Have fun!

#1linerWeds badge by Dan Antion