Life in progress


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335. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Wednesday, August 1st, 5:00pm
Michael (and DeeDee)

 

Michael sits at the window, reading a book. DeeDee takes the seat beside him.

DeeDee: Excuse me.

Michael: (glances up) Oh God, not you again.

DeeDee: Yeah, me again. I’ve got something to ask you.

Michael: I’m not interested.

DeeDee: Oh, I think you will be.

Michael: I’m trying to read.

DeeDee: I can wait ’til you’re finished.

Michael: I’m only a quarter of the way into my book. Good luck.

DeeDee: That’s fine. I’ll count while I wait. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, ni…

Michael: (snaps the book closed) Okay, what do you want?

DeeDee: Did you know that peanut butter was first patented by a Canadian?

Michael: (stares at her) You interrupted my reading for that?

DeeDee: It’s something everyone should know.

Michael shakes his head and goes back to his book.

DeeDee: (singing) Peanut butter jelly time, peanut butter jelly time.

Michael: (closes his book) Do you hate me?

DeeDee: A little. (starts singing again)

 

Next stop: Thursday, August 2nd, 5:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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252. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Thursday, May 10th, 5:00pm
Michael (and Meredith)

 

Michael sits at the window, reading a book. Meredith takes the seat beside him.

Meredith: (clutching head with hands) Ugh!!

Michael ignores her.

Meredith: I can’t stand the pressure!

Michael: (looks up) Are you talking to me?

Meredith: Who else? Don’t you feel the pressure building up sometimes until you can’t stand it anymore?

Michael: No.

Meredith: Not at work? Not at home?

Michael: No.

Meredith: Don’t you ever have deadlines?

Michael: Only the ones I set for myself to read my book. (goes back to reading)

Meredith: (sarcastically) Well then. I’m sorry I disturbed you.

Michael ignores her.

Meredith: Aren’t you going to say ‘that’s okay,’ or anything?

Michael: (without looking up) No.

Meredith: You should.

Michael: (clutching head with hands) Ugh!!!

Meredith: Well! I never!

Meredith changes seats.

 

Next stop: Friday, May 11th, 6:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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215. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Tuesday, April 3rd, 8:00am
Michael (and Joanna)

 

Michael sits at the window reading the newspaper. Joanna takes the seat beside him.

Michael: This is incredible.

Joanna: What is?

Michael: This. (shows her a picture in the newspaper) Did you hear about it?

Joanna: (grimaces) What the hell is that even a picture of?

Michael: (points) It’s a guy.

Joanna: In a tree? What, is he stuck?

Michael: Yeah. He was found hanging from a limb, and … Here, I’ll just read it: “On Sunday morning, an east-end resident called police when she heard loud shrieking noises coming from her back yard shortly after she let her dog out. Before the police arrived, she snapped a picture of a man hanging from her century old oak, pinned there by his collar by a short wooden stake. It wasn’t until police arrived, however, that she found the man’s biggest complaint wasn’t the hanging, but the fact that he had lost his plastic vampire fangs. The dog was later discovered wearing an extra-toothy grin.”

Joanna: (shakes head) Takes all kinds I guess.

 

Next stop: Wednesday, April 4th, 4:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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172. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Monday, February 19th, 8:00am
Michael (and DeeDee)

 

Michael sits at the window, reading. DeeDee takes the seat beside him.

DeeDee: (clears throat) Excuse me, sir?

Michael: I’m reading.

DeeDee: (shifts nervously in the seat) I’d like to interrupt you, if I may.

Michael: (looks up for the first time and does a double take) What for?

DeeDee: I’m sorry, but I’d like to ask you to help me. I’m doing a project for college, and I need to interview someone on the bus.

Michael: (smiles and closes his book on his lap) I’d be pleased to help out.

DeeDee: (exhales deeply) Thank you!

Michael observes her as she bends to pull a notepad out of her back pack.

DeeDee: (holds up finger) I’m almost ready.

Michael: Take your time.

DeeDee: Here we go. (straightens and holds a banana up to her mouth) First question: What would you say is the strangest thing you’ve ever seen on the bus? (moves the banana in Michael’s direction)

Michael: (hesitates) You’re … joking, right?

DeeDee: (brings the banana back) About what? (moves the banana out)

Michael: You’re interviewing me with a banana.

DeeDee: (brings the banana back) No I’m not. (holds up notepad) It’s a notepad.

Michael shakes his head and goes back to reading.

 

Next stop: Tuesday, February 20th, 4:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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148. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Friday, January 26th, 4:00pm
Michael (and Ernest)

 

Michael sits at the window, reading an e-book on his tablet. Ernest takes the seat beside him.

Ernest: Excuse me.

Michael: (without looking up) Yep.

Ernest: I’m from Windows, and I have reason to believe you have a virus on your computer.

Michael: (without looking up) I don’t have a virus.

Ernest: Would you mind turning your computer on?

Michael: (lifts the tablet an inch off his lap) It is on.

Ernest: Now go to the start menu …

Michael: (looks at him) I. Don’t. Have. A. Virus. Can I see your credentials?

Ernest: Er … I left them at the office.

Michael: And where would the office be?

Ernest makes a run for the door.

 

Next stop: Saturday, January 27th, 9:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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91. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Thursday, November 30th, 7:00pm
Michael (and The Darkness)

 

Michael sits at the window, reading The Left Hand of Darkness by Ursula K. Le Guin. The Darkness takes the seat beside him.

The Darkness: (looking back and forth between the book and his own left hand) I am The Darkness.

Michael: (glancing at The Darkness) I beg your pardon?

The Darkness: (snatches the book away) I am the Darkness!

Michael: Hey, give me my book back!

The Darkness: (stands, holding the book up) I AM THE DARKNESS!! I AM THE DARKNESS!!

The Darkness gets kicked off the bus. With Michael’s book.

 

Next stop: Friday, December 1st, 8:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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77. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Note: Strong language

Thursday, November 16th, 6:00pm
Michael (and Wanda)

 

Michael sits at the window, reading a book. Wanda takes the seat beside him.

Wanda: Do you mind if I paint my nails?

Michael: (without looking away from his book) Nope.

Wanda: (takes a bottle of nail polish out of her pocket) Nasty outside today.

Michael: (without looking away from his book) Yep.

Wanda: (singing) Oh the weather outside is frightful. (speaking) Shit. (singing) But the fire is so delightful. (speaking, etc.) Shit. But as long as you love me so.  Shit.  Let …

Michael: (regards her for the first time) Why do you keep saying “shit”?

Wanda: The bus keeps ruining my nail polish when it goes over a bump.

Michael: So don’t paint your nails on the bus.

Wanda: Mind your own business.

Michael goes back to his book.

Wanda: (singing) Let it … Shit. Let it … Shit. Let it … Shit.

 

Next stop: Friday, November 17th, 7:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.