Friday, February 23rd,
Maurice and Stuart
Maurice sits at the window. Stuart takes the seat beside him.
Maurice: Hey! What happened to you? You’re really late tonight.
Stuart: (nods) You remember that old lady who lives with me?
Maurice: Yeah. Is she okay?
Stuart: Oh yeah. We got into a rousing game of Monopoly.
Maurice: I don’t think I’ve ever heard the words “rousing” and “Monopoly” used in the same sentence before.
Stuart: You haven’t met this lady. It all came down to her having hotels on Park Place and Boardwalk, and me with hotels on everything else, and she still won.
Maurice: Wow. The odds are incredible.
Stuart: Not really. Just as I was about to win, the dog and the cat flew across the board, chasing each other, and we lost everything. Had to start over again.
Maurice: Seriously? You must have already been playing for a while if you had all those properties. No wonder you’re late.
Stuart: Oh, no. That’s not why I’m late. The cat got out as I was walking out the door. I had to chase it around the neighbourhood.
Maurice: Oh man. How did you catch it?
Stuart: It got wet.
Maurice: Outside? In this weather?
Stuart: Kid saw me chasing it and squirted the thing with a squirt gun, thinking it was a rat.
Maurice: That’s right. It’s bald on account of the old lady’s allergies. But that doesn’t explain how you caught it.
Stuart: Sure it does. It brushed up against a fence post and got stuck. I’ve spent the last two hours figuring out how to heat up a fence post to get the cat off it.
Maurice: (looking confused) So, how does that have anything to do with the Monopoly game?
Stuart: (shrugs) It doesn’t.
Next stop: Saturday, February 24th, 7:00pm