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165. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Monday, February 12th, 5:00pm
Robert and Donald

 

Donald: So, what are we doing for Valentine’s Day?

Robert: Oh I don’t know.

Donald: I guess we should do something.

Robert: We don’t have to do anything.

Donald: We don’t?

Robert: Well, not together at least.

Donald: What are you suggesting?

Robert: I was thinking about going out with a friend.

Donald: A friend friend? Or …

Robert: Not … necessarily.

Donald: You mean you have a new lover?

Robert: I … might.

Donald: Huh.

Robert: You’re not upset, are you?

Donald: Not … well, not too upset. You could have told me though.

Robert: So what, you could fire me?

Donald: I’d never do that!

Robert: Pfft. Sure.

Donald: I wouldn’t! And anyway, I have a new boyfriend. Take that!

Robert: You do?

Donald: Yes. We’ve been seeing each other for weeks.

Robert: Then why are you still living on my couch?

Donald: Because I didn’t want to upset you!

Robert laughs.

Donald: What are you laughing about?

Robert: Just … nothing.

Donald: Huh. So you want to double date on Wednesday?

Robert: May as well. But you won’t be coming back to my place after.

Donald: Why not?

Robert: Don’t you think that would be a bit awkward?

Donald: Well I can’t go back to his place. He lives with his mother.

Robert: (slumps in his seat) There goes Valentine’s Day.

 

Next stop: Tuesday, February 13th, 5:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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164. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Sunday, February 11th 1:00 1:20pm
Candice and Sandi

 

Candice: I can’t believe Madam called us in to work a double shift.

Sandi: We knew after the third movie came out the dungeon would get busier again.

Candice: (sighs) Yeah. Oh well. My favourite new client is coming in tonight.

Sandi: Justin?

Candice nods happily.

Sandi: Really like him, do you?

Candice: Kinda.

Sandi: I’m happy for you.

Candice: Thanks. So what’s going on with the preacher these days? Not working yet?

Sandi: Nope.

Candice: I’m surprised he hasn’t asked you to quit. Or have you brought him over to the dark side?

Sandi: (snorts) Whichever, I just wish he’d decide what he wants to do. I don’t mind being the breadwinner ‘n’ all, but he’s been miserable sitting around doing nothing ever since we got married.

Candice: Tell him to get involved with a group for wayward souls. God knows we get enough of those at work.

Sandi: The scared and the curious.

Candice: And now the Ana-wannabes.

Sandi: (rolls eyes) Yep. You may have something there.

 

Next stop: Monday, February 12th 5:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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163. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Saturday, February 10th, 5:00pm
Misery and Gay

 

Gay: So whatcha doin’ tomorrow?

Misery: I don’t know. Sleepin’ I guess.

Gay: We should go out! Soak up some sunshine!

Misery: It’s supposed to snow.

Gay: Then we can go shopping! For boots!

Misery: I don’t have any money.

Gay: I’ll buy you some!

Misery: I take a size 18. (slides foot out from the seat in front) My shoes cost hundreds of dollars.

Gay: Then how about some new underwear? Nothing better than a new pair of panties!

Misery: Had a thong once. I lost it.

Gay: (frowns) You lost it? Wha … OH!

Misery smiles.

 

Next stop: Sunday, February 11th, 1:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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162. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Note: Strong language

Friday, February 9th 9:00pm
Brandon and Jordan

 

Brandon: How goes it with Marissa?

Jordan: I’ve decided to get back together with her.

Brandon: Does that mean …?

Jordan: (nods) I’ve got it all planned out for Valentine’s Day. Hotel room, flowers, chocolate, champagne; the whole nine yards.

Brandon: Scruples be damned?

Jordan: I just can’t live without her, ya know?

Brandon: You know, she’s not the only girl out there.

Jordan: She is for me.

Brandon: Do you know if she’s a virgin too?

Jordan: She’s not.

Brandon snorts.

Jordan: What?

Brandon: I’m afraid she’s just using you. What if she has her way with you and then just forgets about you?

Jordan: What if I punch you in the head?

Brandon: Hey man, I’m just looking out for your best interests.

Jordan: Yeah, well, she’d never do that. She loves me.

Brandon: Not enough to stay with you if you don’t have sex with her.

Jordan: You’re an asshole, you know that?

Brandon: (turns to the window, mumbling) Yeah, the asshole who’ll be here to pick up the pieces.

 

Next stop: Saturday, February 10th, 5:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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161. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Thursday, February 8th, 7:00pm
Bella and Edgar (and Edward)

 

Edgar: It’s going to be great meeting your parents. Do you really think they’ll like me?

Bella: What’s not to like? You were the captain of the football team, which my dad is going to love.

Edgar: That was a couple of years ago though.

Bella: And now you’re an electrical engineer. (takes his arm and hugs it) Brains and strength.

Edgar: And your mom?

Bella: You know how to cook. She’ll be very impressed. (kisses him on the cheek)

Edgar: Thanks. I feel bett …

Edward: (popping up in the seat behind) Who’s this, Bella?

Bella: (rolling her eyes) He’s my boyfriend. What’s it to you?

Edward: He’s not meant for you. I am.

Bella: You’re crazy.

Edward: Crazy in love with you.

Edgar: (turns) Step aside, man.

Edward: I will not! Bella is the love of my life! My soulmate! There can only be one for h …

Edgar: (punches him in the nose) I said, step aside. The lady wants nothing to do with you.

Edward: (holding his nose and heading for the door) I’ll get you for this! You have no idea what it’s like to feel the wrath of a vampire! (gets off the bus)

Edgar: Do you think your friend Drommen will be happy with that little performance?

Bella: (smiling) Very. You really should come and meet my parents. For real.

Edgar: Don’t you think we should go out together first?

Bella: Is that an invitation?

Edgar: (smiles) Valentine’s is soon …

Bella: (smiles widely) Sounds like a date.

 

Next stop: Friday, February 9th, 9:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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160. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Wednesday, February 7th, 7:00pm
Quinn and Yvonne

 

Quinn: Now that you’ve been a couple of days without morning sickness, where do you want to eat on Saturday night?

Yvonne: I’d really like a steak … if that’s what you want.

Quinn: Sure. (smiles and takes her hand) I think we’re going to be okay, don’t you?

Yvonne: Yeah. Especially now my mother’s out of the hospital. I think the psychiatrist was a good idea. Thanks for arranging it.

Quinn: Maybe when she sees the baby she’ll accept him for what he is, and not just a sign she’s getting old.

Yvonne: I hope so.

Quinn: You’re sure you want to go to this shop we’re going to? With the baby and all?

Yvonne: I think so. It’ll be nice to have all the equipment for after the movie Friday night. You’ll be taking notes, right?

Quinn: Of course. (reaches into pocket) Oh, here. (hands her a paper) I got my collar size.

Yvonne: (smiles and takes the paper) Thank you Mr. Grey.

Quinn: My pleasure, Mrs. Grey.

 

Next stop: Thursday, February 8th, 7:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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159. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Tuesday, February 6th, 3:00 2:00pm
Maurice and Stuart

 

(Stuart sits at the window. Maurice takes the seat beside him.)

Maurice: Hey! You’re early for once.

Stuart: Yep. Gotta go buy a new rug before work.

Maurice: Cat peed on it one too many times?

Stuart: Nope. Dog bled all over it.

Maurice: You’ve got a dog now?

Stuart: Not only that. You remember the old lady whose dog I accidentally killed?

Maurice: The one whose next dog ran away, and who’s deathly allergic to cats?

Stuart: That’s right. She’s living with me now too.

Maurice: But … why? And how is she living with you if you’ve got a cat?

Stuart: As for why, she spent so long in the hospital that she missed paying her rent and got kicked out. So I offered to take her in.

Maurice: And the cat?

Stuart: Shaved it.

Maurice: The cat mustn’t have enjoyed that.

Stuart: Nope. It looks like a giant bald squirrel.

Maurice: So what happened to the dog? You said it bled all over your rug.

Stuart: Well yeah. The dog took one look at the cat after we shaved it and thought it was a squirrel. Dog tried to eat the cat, cat scratched the dog.

Maurice: Wow. That must have been one hell of a scratch to make the dog bleed like that.

Stuart: Well, yeah. Because we shaved the dog too.

Maurice: The old lady’s not allergic to dogs though. She had one before.

Stuart: Nope. I am.

Maurice: The two of you are a match made in heaven.

 

Next stop: Wednesday, February 7th, 7:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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158. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Monday, February 5th, 5:00pm
Alfred and Hester

 

Hester: When does the urologist want you to go back for the test?

Alfred: How should I know?

Hester: The receptionist gave you the little card, didn’t she?

Alfred digs into his coat pocket and pulls out an appointment card.

Hester: Give it to me then. (adjusts glasses) It’s in two weeks. A “flow test.” What the hell is one of them then?

Alfred: I don’t know. Maybe they want to see if I do better at getting it up with your sister.

 

Next stop: Tuesday, February 6th, 3:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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157. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right (#SoCS edition)

Sunday, February 4th, 3:00am
Moosh and Hip

 

Moosh: Where are we going again?

Hip: Nowhere.

Moosh: In other words, we’re just going around in circles.

Hip: It’s an experiment.

Moosh: To see how long it takes to get kicked off the bus?

Hip: Exactly.

Moosh: And what if we get kicked off when we’re miles away from home?

Hip: (shrugs) We’ll wait and catch the next bus.

Moosh: But you know it’s going to be the same bus driver. He’s not going to let us back on again.

Hip: Oh. I didn’t think of that. We’ll just have to walk home then.

Moosh: We can’t walk. You’re broken.

Hip: You’ve got crutches.

Moosh: They’re not for walking miles with.

Hip: …

Moosh: (rolls eyes) That’s what I get for having hip for brains.

 

Next stop: Monday, February 5th, 5:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.

This post is part of Stream of Consciousness Saturday. Click here to join in! https://lindaghill.com/2018/02/02/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-feb-3-18/


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156. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Note: Strong language

Saturday, February 3rd, 6:00pm
Michelle (and Sean)

 

Michelle sits at the window, sleeping. Sean takes the seat beside her.

Michelle: (waking up) What the fuck … Where am I?

Sean: Just passed Main Street.

Michelle: (sits up abruptly) Main Street? Shit! I was supposed to get off at Front Street. My mom’s going to kill me! Time is it?

Sean: Ten o’clock.

Michelle: Ten!? I’ve been sleeping for four fucking hours?

Sean: (chuckles) It’s only six. And Front Street’s just up ahead.

Michelle: You’re an asshole, you know that?

Sean: (sighs) Yeah.

 

Next stop: Sunday, February 4th, 3:00am

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.