Life in progress


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#JusJoJan prompt the 5th – “Gurgle”

(FICTION) (Thanks to Di at http://pensitivity101.wordpress.com/ for the idea for the story.)

PART 2 (FIND PART 1 HERE IF YOU HAVEN’T READ IT YET.)

When Petra had first heard about “Mother,” she imagined a big, furry Newfoundland dog, such was the atmosphere of this strange house she’d been hired to work in. But no—“Mother” was indeed a woman, the mother of the lady of the house. Not knowing her employer’s maiden name, she couldn’t call “Mother” anything else. And “Mother” didn’t seem to mind.

Petra walked down the hall and knocked on “Mother’s” bedroom door. She hated when it was closed—she never knew what she’d find “Mother” doing when she walked in. One time she’d been staring into a crystal ball she’d set in the middle of her massive bed, mumbling at it in what sounded like backwards English. Another time, Petra had opened the door to catch “Mother” scrambling to hide someone under the bed, even though she’d called out to Petra to come in.

“Mother” had hiked up the straps of her bra (she wasn’t wearing a blouse) and asked Petra, “What do you want?” as she gathered up a deck of cards from the bed. Petra suspected “Mother” had been playing strip poker with whomever she had hidden.

“You called me, ‘Mother,’” Petra had said.

Which was what she said when she walked in tonight. “Mother” was in bed, her bedcovers clutched in both hands all the way up under her chin, her teeth in a small pink pot on the antique nightstand.

“I need a bottle of wine,” “Mother” croaked. “My wine. Not that cheap crap my good-for-nothing son-in-law buys.”

“Yes, ‘Mother,’” Petra said as she turned to go.

“And don’t bother with a glass. I’ll drink it straight out of the bottle.” Without her teeth in, the word “straight” came out “schtraight.”

“Yes, ‘Mother,” Petra repeated. She left the door open a little as she retreated, wondering as she descended the stairs why they didn’t just give “Mother” a cell phone so they didn’t have to keep going up to see what she wanted.

Downstairs, the party was still humming away. Petra avoided the guests by ducking between them with her eyes down. She ran into Geeves again on her way through the kitchen to the wine cellar.

“How did you find ‘Mother’?” he asked.

“Toothless and wineless,” Petra answered.

Geeves sniffed at her and off he went again.

Petra hated the wine cellar. Lit with only one bare lightbulb, the corners smelled of black, oily dust, and it was quiet enough to hear the mice scurrying around.

She hurried down the wooden stairs and turned down the corridor whose walls were lined with bottles in ceiling-high racks, to the back corner where they kept “Mother’s” wine. Only the rack was empty.

A gurgling sound came from the far corner of the cellar.

(To be continued on Thursday.)

(Di’s prompt was “Petra as a name, wine cellar as a setting, and ‘getting caught’ as your what if. “)


Here are the JusJoJan Rules:

1. Just Jot It January starts January 1st, but it’s never too late to join in! Here, we run on the honour system; the “jot it” part of JusJoJan means that anything you jot down, anywhere (it doesn’t have to be a post, it can even be a grocery list), counts as a “jot.” If it makes it to your blog that day, great! If it waits a week to get from a sticky note to your screen, no problem!

2. I’ll post prompts at 2am my time (GMT -5). The prompt will be the word in quotation marks in the title of my 2am post. You don’t have to follow the prompt every day, but that will be where you leave your link for others to see. You’ll get a prompt for every day except Wednesday, when the prompt is simply my One-Liner Wednesday and on Saturday, when your prompt will be the Friday Reminder and Prompt for #SoCS, which will appear at about 9:30am Friday. Each prompt post will include the rules.

3. Please ping back or link to the daily prompt. To ping back, just copy the URL from the daily prompt post, and paste it anywhere in your post. Check to make sure your link shows up where you want it to, and go back occasionally to see other bloggers’ entries – the more you visit others, the more they’ll visit you! Note: A) The newest pingbacks will be at the top of the comments section. B) Ping backs only work if you’re blogging on WordPress. Everyone else must paste a link manually.

4. Tag your post JusJoJan and/or #JusJoJan.

5. Write anything! Any length will do! It can even be a photo or a drawing – you’re going to title it, right? There’s your jot!

6. If your post is NSFW, do not ping back. Please leave your link in the comments with a warning.

7. If you’d like to, use the JusJoJan badge so that others can find your post more easily.

8. Have fun!


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#JusJoJan prompt the 3rd – “Servant”

(FICTION) (Thanks to Di at http://pensitivity101.wordpress.com/ for the idea for the story.)

Petra was practically dead on her feet. But working the New Year’s Eve party for the Jones’s did that to her every year.

Midnight had come and gone and the be-tied and be-gowned guests were showing no signs of wanting to go home. The men with their “haw-haw-haw” laughs and the women who gossiped about one another the moment they were out of earshot made Petra’s eyes roll so many times, she’d been able to count her own eyelashes.

So she was less than amused when she went into the kitchen with her umpteenth tray of dirty champagne glasses and Geeves, the elderly butler that looked like a fireplace poker in a waiter’s tux, turned to her and said, “‘Mother’ wants you upstairs.”

“Why me?” Petra asked, but Geeves just turned up his nose and walked out of the kitchen with a sniff in Petra’s direction and not much more. She was almost positive “Mother” hadn’t asked for her personally, but what was Petra to do? She needed the job.

So usually twinkletoed Petra weaved her way through the stuffiness of the living room full of guests and trudged up the massive, winding flights of stairs to “Mother”‘s room, passing portraits of “Mother” on her way.

(To be continued on Tuesday.)

(Di’s prompt was “Petra as a name, wine cellar as a setting, and ‘getting caught’ as your what if. “)


Here are the JusJoJan Rules:

1. Just Jot It January starts January 1st, but it’s never too late to join in! Here, we run on the honour system; the “jot it” part of JusJoJan means that anything you jot down, anywhere (it doesn’t have to be a post, it can even be a grocery list), counts as a “jot.” If it makes it to your blog that day, great! If it waits a week to get from a sticky note to your screen, no problem!

2. I’ll post prompts at 2am my time (GMT -5). The prompt will be the word in quotation marks in the title of my 2am post. You don’t have to follow the prompt every day, but that will be where you leave your link for others to see. You’ll get a prompt for every day except Wednesday, when the prompt is simply my One-Liner Wednesday and on Saturday, when your prompt will be the Friday Reminder and Prompt for #SoCS, which will appear at about 9:30am Friday. Each prompt post will include the rules.

3. Please ping back or link to the daily prompt. To ping back, just copy the URL from the daily prompt post, and paste it anywhere in your post. Check to make sure your link shows up where you want it to, and go back occasionally to see other bloggers’ entries – the more you visit others, the more they’ll visit you! Note: A) The newest pingbacks will be at the top of the comments section. B) Ping backs only work if you’re blogging on WordPress. Everyone else must paste a link manually.

4. Tag your post JusJoJan and/or #JusJoJan.

5. Write anything! Any length will do! It can even be a photo or a drawing – you’re going to title it, right? There’s your jot!

6. If your post is NSFW, do not ping back. Please leave your link in the comments with a warning.

7. If you’d like to, use the JusJoJan badge so that others can find your post more easily.

8. Have fun!


65 Comments

#JusJoJan prompt the 1st – “Speech”

(FICTION)

*ahem*

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, theys and thems,

Thank you all so very much for being here. I’d like to start off by saying it’s not my fault. I know, I know. Calm down. I know you’re angry at me, but hear me out.

I’m not the one who brought you the fires and the murder hornets and the plague. I didn’t stick you in your homes and not let you out, and I’m certainly not the one who made you forget what day it was.

Random person from the crowd: Then what did you do for us?

I gave you the time you wanted. All those extra hours in a day you’ve been asking for? I might not have given you extra, but they sure felt longer, those days.

Random person from the crowd: You still suck!

Fine, fine. I suck. I’m leaving now. But know this: if you survived me, which you did, you can survive just about anything.

All of the crowd: You suck, 2020!

*2020 leaves the stage, mumbling, Thanks for being here.*


Here are the JusJoJan Rules:

1. Just Jot It January starts January 1st, but it’s never too late to join in! Here, we run on the honour system; the “jot it” part of JusJoJan means that anything you jot down, anywhere (it doesn’t have to be a post, it can even be a grocery list), counts as a “jot.” If it makes it to your blog that day, great! If it waits a week to get from a sticky note to your screen, no problem!

2. I’ll post prompts at 2am my time (GMT -5). The prompt will be the word in quotation marks in the title of my 2am post. You don’t have to follow the prompt every day, but that will be where you leave your link for others to see. You’ll get a prompt for every day except Wednesday, when the prompt is simply my One-Liner Wednesday and on Saturday, when your prompt will be the Friday Reminder and Prompt for #SoCS, which will appear at about 9:30am Friday. Each prompt post will include the rules.

3. Please ping back or link to the daily prompt. To ping back, just copy the URL from the daily prompt post, and paste it anywhere in your post. Check to make sure your link shows up where you want it to, and go back occasionally to see other bloggers’ entries – the more you visit others, the more they’ll visit you! Note: A) The newest pingbacks will be at the top of the comments section. B) Ping backs only work if you’re blogging on WordPress. Everyone else must paste a link manually.

4. Tag your post JusJoJan and/or #JusJoJan.

5. Write anything! Any length will do! It can even be a photo or a drawing – you’re going to title it, right? There’s your jot!

6. If your post is NSFW, do not ping back. Please leave your link in the comments with a warning.

7. If you’d like to, use the JusJoJan badge so that others can find your post more easily.

8. Have fun!


16 Comments

Exciting News – a New Short Story!

Transmundane Press’s new book of short stories is out, and I’m in it! ON TIME is a massive anthology, with 75 stories by 71 authors and 15 original pieces of art.

*As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.

To learn more about my paranormal story, “Wasted,” in this fantastic book, check out my guest post on Transmundane’s blog. https://transmundanepressblog.wordpress.com/2020/10/08/what-if-your-time-was-not-wasted-by-linda-g-hill/

And when you’re finished that, here’s my interview! https://transmundanepressblog.wordpress.com/2020/10/05/linda-g-hill-an-on-time-author-interview/

Here’s a big list of all the places you can buy the book. For the back-cover blurb, see below:

Buy Amazon US                   Buy Amazon UK
Buy Amazon DE                  Buy Amazon FR
Buy Amazon ES                     Buy Amazon IT
Buy Amazon AU                 Buy Amazon CA
Buy Amazon NL                     Buy Amazon BR
Buy Amazon IN                 Buy Amazon JP
Buy Amazon MX
Barnes & Noble
Buy Kobo
Buy the Hardback

…tick-tock-tick-tock-tick-tock-tick-tock-tick-tock-tick-tock…

Are we controlled by TIME’s callous whims? An unyielding, enslaving construct, trapping us within unstoppable second-hands.

Or is TIME an illusion? Changing the continuum’s flow, we unlock forbidden power and break our servitude to existence’s linear chains.

The future affects the past. ON TIME features seventy-plus stories that fling us forward, promise progress while dropping destruction, and replay our regrets.

Will we learn from our mistakes or must we forever remain TIME’s servant?


40 Comments

I’ve been published … again!

Moonlight, Monsters & Magic has been my labour of love over the past six weeks. From writing what turned out to be a delightful little romance story about a Pixie who gets temporarily exiled, to copyediting an amazing collection of short stories … I can’t believe the day is finally here to share it with everyone!

You’ll find the link to purchase it from your favorite e-book distributor under the picture below, as well as at the end of this post.

I can’t wait for you to read it!

 

FB-Cover

Moonlight, Monsters & Magic

A Paranormal Romance Sexy Shorts Collection

750x1000-(ePub)

What do you get when you put 13 wickedly talented authors together in one collection?

MOONLIGHT and MONSTERS and MAGIC, oh my!

Find tales of shifters and witches, ghosts and mythical creatures, and even an angel or two in this supernatural anthology of paranormal romance stories, featuring award-winning paranormal romance author, Linda G. Hill.

Treat yourself to a phenomenal read!

 

 

 

One click here:

Amazon
Google Play
Kobo
Barnes & Noble
Apple iBooks

add to goodreads

Synopses

 

Diwata by Zara M Baily

With his life at stake, Comandante Julio Gomez arrives in the Philippines, hoping to reverse a century-old curse that a mountain nymph placed on his ancestor. Julio doesn’t expect to meet the woman from his troubled dreams.

A woman whose fate is intrinsically linked with his. For in her hands lies his salvation …

Or his eternal damnation.

Love Out of the Ashes by Tabetha Waite

For years, Markus Henley has been haunted by a recurring dream—a sensual vision of a mysterious woman. He finally encounters her on a fateful trip, but not everything is as it appears …

Tormented by a terrible tragedy that has broken her spirit, Laura Tipton feels she has nothing left. Then Markus arrives to awaken her spirit. In more ways than one.

Honey and her Grumpy Bear by Taylor Morgan

Someone’s been sleeping in my bed…

Everett’s spent his life mistrusting humans. The last thing this shifter needs is a week with his sister’s sweet-as-honey best-friend underfoot. As his desire surges, he resolves to push Honey away—for good.

This man is just right.

 Mari’s living her dream: opening a café in a small Tennessee mountain town. The only thing left on her list is her dream man. Lucky for her, she’s now living with him for a week. And she knows just how to trap a hungry bear.

When this bear reveals the truth of his growly nature, will Goldilocks run away?

Swan Song by Everleigh Allen

During Liah’s once-in-a-lifetime trip to Ireland, things begin to get weird. Even as she becomes more isolated, a magical world opens up to her.

Torn between Fiachra and his mesmerizing voice, and the mysterious and handsome Eóghan, Liah finds herself seemingly trapped in a world where nothing makes sense.

Meanwhile, someone is out to get her. But who?

Heart of Stone by Emmaline Warden

As a lady’s maid, Annie craves stability and security. But she knows her destiny is greater than her reality.

When Theo approaches her, claiming to be her soulmate from a past life, she is left questioning and afraid. Can she accept that there is a world larger than her own guiding her existence? Will she take the leap of faith and believe in the magic that made Theo appear?

The Secrets of Hickory Hollow by Belle Langtree

A royal warlock and his playboy minion need the help of two sisters in order to save their clan from a wretched curse. Through true love, rooted in two separate worlds, a magical prophecy unfolds.

True love is the cure for any curse. True love and tree nuts, that is!

Leaving Limbo by Lucinda Cox

Jaxx Carter, ghost hunter, needs a legitimate haunting to establish his career as an Internet star. Too bad he doesn’t think ghosts are real.

Enter Burroughs Manor, an unexplored estate with ties to Jaxx’s family. A tall, dark stranger awaits him there, to give him a night he’ll never forget.

The Doctor and the Wolf by Chele MacCabe

Jake Campbell knows at five years old that Ashley Jerome is his one true mate. When she leaves for medical school, he and his wolf are devastated.

When Ashley returns to open her practice, Jake makes up mysterious ailments just to see her. On the day she falls into his arms—with the help of her best friend—Jake and Ashley immediately make their first date.

But when the big and bads show up–what will a doctor and her wolf do?

White by Sera Taíno

Thiago undergoes open heart surgery, but complications arise.

At the same time, Clara is involved in a catastrophic car accident.

What happens when you meet your soulmate on the brink of death? Hovering on the precipice, does love stand a chance?

Fortune Favors the Feline by Elizabeth Langley

What would you do if you got exactly what you wished for?

What if your best friend wasn’t who you thought he was?

Olivia has looked for true love her whole life. She just didn’t know it was always there, right by her side … demanding to be fed.

When a birthday gift leads her in a familiar, yet different direction, will Olivia let down her guard and let love win?

Miss Carlisle by Emma Brady

On a pitch-black night, a country doctor comes across a place of mystery and magic. He becomes trapped inside a manor house during a storm with a beautiful young nurse he can’t resist, and the troubled spirit of Lady Winship, lurking in the shadows.

The elements of horror and romance come together in a dark love story that will haunt you.

Saving Faith by Allegra Johnson

In a modern world where the Salem Witch Trials exist, Faith is a witch being hunted.

Gabe is an investigator sworn to hunt her down. Perhaps their relationship was doomed from the start.

But when Faith drinks her mother’s potion and disappears, Gabe’s true hunt begins, this time for love.

Pixie by Linda G. Hill

Merryn, a pixie temporarily exiled, wakes up to an unfamiliar world.

Ivy, a lonely young widow, has a decision to make concerning a suitor who misses the mark in every way.

When Merryn stumbles into Ivy’s life they dance around each other, knowing he will soon disappear.

Can they resist? Yes. As long as they never touch.

 

About the Authors

 

Zara 2Zara M Baily writes multicultural romance short stories that are erotic, paranormal, fantasy, and perhaps also historical in the future. One thing is for certain: Zara doesn’t do, and won’t ever do, sweet. Or clean. Her sexytimes may be dirty at times, but they’re always, always consensual and responsible.

Follow Zara here:
Facebook Profile: zaram.baily.3
Facebook Author Page: ZaraMBaily
Goodreads: Zara_M_Baily
Instagram: zarambaily

 

 

 

 

Tabetha (2)

Tabetha Waite is the award-winning author of the Ways of Love historical romance series. She makes her home in Missouri with her husband and two daughters. She loves to hear from her readers!

Follow Tabetha here:
Website: authortabethawaite.wix.com/romance
Facebook Profile: tabetha.waite
Facebook Author Page: totallytabetha
Instagram: tabethawaite
Twitter: @totallytabetha

 

 

 

 

View More: http://maggieburnettphotography.pass.us/2018-8-cw-headshots-2018Taylor Morgan has always had a penchant for fairy tales—and not the Disney sort. Currently, she is creating tales that feature heroes who are more likely to hide in the woods than ride off into the sunset, and the heroines who claim their hearts. Taylor lives in Alabama with her husband, daughter, and dog. If missing, she’s probably holed up with a new book, a blanket, and a glass of wine or a Pumpkin Spice Latte.

Follow Taylor here:
Facebook: tmsorenson
Instagram: booksandbevvys

 

 

 

 

 

Annie

Everleigh Allen writes creative stories with a mysterious, mythical, magical, and racy edge. Her tales bring her readers into worlds that she wants to visit herself.

She lives in Texas with her husband, three of her four children, and a zoo of animals. She is also a sculptor and artist in multiple mediums. A writer of fiction that has been featured online for years, the MOONLIGHT, MONSTERS & MAGIC anthology is Everleigh’s first published work.

Follow Everleigh here:
Facebook Profile: AuthorEverleighAllen
Facebook Author Page: EverleighAllenAuthor
Instagram: everleighallen

 

 

emmalineEmmaline Warden lives in Colorado with her husband, four Chaos Makers, and a menagerie of animals. Her love of romance began with an accidental copy of Susan Elizabeth Phillips’s Dream a Little Dream, and a trip to D.C. When she is not writing, she can be found outdoors with her kids, at the dog park with “her boys,” or with her nose buried in a book.

Follow Emmaline here:
Facebook: emmaline.warden
Instagram: authoremmalinewarden
Twitter: @emmaline_warden

 

 

 

Lorey (2)Belle Langtree’s passion for hot, sexy romance began in the late seventies, after reading The Flame and The Flowerby Kathleen Woodiwiss. Over the years, her book club friends encouraged her to write her own love stories. Belle lives in the great State of Michigan with her loving husband of fifty happy years and their wild and crazy rescue pup named Faith Fu Fu.

Follow Belle on:
Facebook: lorey.frazher
Instagram: loreyfrazher
Twitter: @LFrazher

 

 

 

Raine

 

Lucinda Cox lives in Los Angeles with her family and five houseplants. She writes about love, because love is all you need.

Follow Lucinda on:
Twitter: @coxwrites

 

 

 

 

 

Chele (2)Chele MacCabe has spent the last several years learning to string words together to tell stories. After all that practice and playing with her favorite fandom, she is ready to share her imagination with the rest of the world. She lives in the mountains with her mister, the short and the medium sized ones, and the critters that have found their way into their lives.

Follow Chele here:
Facebook: Chele MacCabe
Tumblr: chele20035 
Twitter: @chele20035 

 

 

 

 

Sera.pngSera Taíno was born to Puerto Rican parents in New Jersey. She writes romances featuring the kinds of women she grew up around. Sera currently lives in Florida with her husband and two sons, and teaches English Lit by day. A voracious reader as well as an avid outdoors person, she’s often torn between curling up on a sofa with a cup of coffee and a good book, and taking off for a long run on the trails around her house.

Follow Sera here:
Facebook: seratainowrites
Goodreads: sera_taino
Pinterest: serataino
Tumblr: serataino
Twitter: @serataino

 

 

Elizabeth Langely Bio photo (1)Elizabeth Langley has been writing stories for as long as she can remember. Her love of romance novels started in her early twenties and has continued throughout her life. She is currently working on a few contemporary novels that she hopes to release within the next year. She lives in the beautiful Pacific Northwest with her husband, two children, one bonus child, three neurotic cats (one of which is probably an alien disguised as a cat), an energetic Corgi, and a homicidal rabbit.

Follow her on:
Facebook: lizlangleyauthor

 

 

 

 

new years eve 2017

 

Emma Brady is a mid-western author of historical romance, set primarily in the Victorian period. She loves Gothic stories and has always loved Wuthering Heights. Her favorite part of Halloween is getting to dress up and pretend to be anything she likes.

Follow her on:
Facebook: hotbooklover

 

 

 

 

AllegraAllegra Johnson is an up-and-coming indie author who enjoys writing steamy love stories. She can be found stumbling throughout Romancelandia, figuring out this author thing one book at a time.

You can follow her amusing adventures in writing and learn more about her books at:
Facebook: stumblingauthor
Instagram: allegra_johnson
Twitter: @Allegra55302863

 

 

 

 

LindaLinda G. Hill has been writing out-of-this world romance stories since she was a child. Living vicariously through the characters in her head, she’s experienced the kinds of love that mortals only dream of. In reality, she’s just a mom, an author, an editor, and a couch potato if there ever was one.

Linda’s published works include the award-winning Gothic paranormal romance novel The Magician’s Curse, and its sequel, The Magician’s Blood, as well as All Good Stories, a romcom novelette, and several short stories published by Transmundane Press and The Phoenix Quill.

You can find Linda at the following:
Website: lindaghill
Facebook: lindaghill.fiction
Twitter: @LindaGHill

 

 

 

Buy Moonlight, Monsters & Magic at this fancy link that will take you to the retailer of your choice. Click now! https://books2read.com/MoonlightMonstersMagic


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365. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Friday, August 31st, 8:00am
Milo (and Mortimer)

 

Milo sits at the window. Mortimer takes the seat beside him.

Mortimer: How’s the afterlife treating you?

Milo: You can see me?

Mortimer: I can. Because I’m dead like you. We only get to come out a few times a year–this is one of them.

Milo: What’s so special about today?

Mortimer: Bus is in to have the upholstery cleaned.

Milo: About time too. This seat is all sticky.

Mortimer: (laughs) That’ll be our friend Jake Drommen. He didn’t last long.

Milo: I’ve seen him. Do you think he’ll go straight?

Mortimer: Eventually. Sooner rather than later I think.

Milo: Got all kinds of people on this bus.

Mortimer: Oh yeah. Gals who work in dungeons, pick-up artists, cheaters, gossips, philosophers, cantankerous old people, cartoon characters … even a few vampires for good measure.

Milo: You forgot the cannibal.

Mortimer: Oh yes. I think that’s how The Darkness got the way he is–cannibalism.

Milo: Someone should tell Andrea.

Mortimer: She’ll figure it out for herself. The figuring will give her something to keep her busy while she gets over Edward.

Milo: True enough.

Mortimer: Not a bad place to spend an eternity. Keeps me entertained at least.

Milo: Is there any getting off this thing?

Mortimer: Not that I’ve found.

Milo: Have you ever tried pulling the cord to get the bus to stop?

Mortimer: Nope, haven’t tried that. But be my guest.

Milo: I think I’ll do that. (thinks about it for a moment) After I find out what happens next.

 

Bus out of service.

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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364. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Thursday, August 30th, 6:00pm
Drommen (and Sheila)

 

Drommen sits at the window. Sheila takes the seat beside him.

Sheila: Hi.

Drommen: (smiles) Hi.

Sheila: You’re looking like you’re pretty pleased with yourself.

Drommen: I am. I’ve decided to give up a part of my life that was no good for me. Let it go. Now I’m much happier.

Sheila: Well, good for you!

Drommen: Thank you.

Sheila: It’s important for people to set limits for themselves.

Drommen: It is.

Sheila: And to follow their dreams.

Drommen: Indeed.

Sheila: Hey, can I ask you a question?

Drommen: Go right ahead.

Sheila: Do you mind if I masturbate?

 

Next stop: Friday, August 31st, 8:00am

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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363. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Wednesday, August 29th, 9:00pm
Bella (and Alice) (and Lily)

 

Bella sits at the window. Alice takes the seat beside her.

Alice: Hey.

Bella: Hey. So what did you find out?

Alice: Turns out they transferred Edward out of prison and into some sort of mental facility. He ran away from there while security had their backs turned.

Bella: I knew he didn’t turn to smoke! What a liar.

Alice: But there’s that thing with the house. I still can’t explain that.

Lily: (pops up from behind the seat, making Bella and Alice jump) I can.

Bella: (to Alice) You’d think we’d get used to that.

Alice: (to Lily) We don’t want your explanation.

Lily: Oh, but you should. You see, Edward was never really a vampire.

Bella: Well, duh!

Lily: But I am. And I can do all sorts of things.

Alice: Can you disappear?

Lily: I can. In fact I’m going to. I’m going to join Edward in Transylvania and give him what he’s always wanted.

Bella: A life?

Lily: Eternal life. And then I’m sure he’ll be back for you. (breathing into the back of Bella’s neck) I wouldn’t stop looking over your shoulder, Bella.

Lily disappears in a puff of air.

Alice: Wait! Where’d she go this time?

Bella: (squeezes past Alice and stands in the aisle facing the seat behind them) Mosquito! (slaps the seat and kills the mosquito on the seat) Sucker!

Alice: One down! (high-fives Bella)

 

Next stop: Thursday, August 30th, 6:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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362. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Tuesday, August 28th, 5:00pm
Ms. Ethics (and Hilda)

 

Ms. Ethics sits at the window. Hilda takes the seat beside her.

Hilda: Long time no see.

Ms. Ethics: Well, hello. How is your seance business going?

Hilda: Wonderfully, thank you.

Ms. Ethics sniffs and turns to the window.

Hilda: How is your column working out for you?

Ms. Ethics: (turns back) Very well, thank you. My clientele is mostly happy with my work.

Hilda: That’s lovely. All of mine are happy.

Ms. Ethics: (blinks a few times) Well bully for you.

Hilda: Listen. I was hoping I’d run in to you again. I have a question for you. It’s a personal one. Nothing to do with a client.

Ms. Ethics: (smirking) Go ahead.

Hilda: Would it be improper to tell my ex that his house is haunted by a bad spirit after he’s bought it? He’s going to sign the papers today.

Ms. Ethics opens her mouth, closes it again, and turns to the window.

 

Next stop: Saturday, August 29th, 9:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.


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361. Scenes from the Second Seat on the Right

Monday, August 27th, 5:00pm
Alfred and Hester

 

Hester: Now you’ve got your Viagra, what are you going to do when we get home?

Alfred: Obviously anything to get out of ironing my own shirts.

 

Next stop: Tuesday, August 28th, 5:00pm

Click here to learn all about this series, how it works, and where to find your favourite characters.