Hear ye, hear ye! I’ve got absolutely nothing to say. Nothing that doesn’t sound like a broken record, at least:
I’m tire … I’m tire … I’m tire … I’ screeech
I’ve come to the conclusion that it’s impossible to find an onomatopoeic word that describes a needle scratching across a record. (It took me far too long to get that word right. You know the one I’m talking about.)
Anyway, if you haven’t figured it out yet, I’m exhausted. Yet again. I think I may be close to burning out. I seriously need a vacation. One that will allow me to just hibernate with a book … not a book that I have to work on. Another thirteen-hour day today … I forgot to eat dinner. I probably shouldn’t do that before I go to sleep.
I think I might just treat myself to an hour of Outlander (the show, not the book – I’ve already read the series three times) before I go to sleep tonight. And a cup of tea. Yeah.
Saturday, November 18th, 8:00pm
Drommen (and Edward)
Drommen sits at the window. Edward takes the seat beside him.
Drommen: What the hell are you doing back?
Edward: I’ve decided to forgive you.
Drommen:(laughs) You’re joking.
Edward: No. I’ve forgiven you because it’s obvious you’re not trying to kill me. Not like some people.
Drommen: I don’t want to kill you. I just want you and your plastic fangs and your sparkles off my bus.
Edward:(hisses, showing his plastic teeth) They’re not plastic. They’re all mine.
Drommen: I have no doubt they’re yours. Where’d you buy them from – Dollarama?
Edward: I got them from the dentist. After someone knocked my real fangs out.
Drommen: Your real fangs?
Edward: His name was van Helsing. Do you know him?
Drommen: Yeah, I know him. He was from Dracula.
Edward: Dracula? No way. Dracula was a myth. I’m the real thing.
Drommen: Pfft. You’re just a teeny-bopper wannabe.
Edward: I am not! Do you want me to bite your neck and prove it?
Drommen:(glares for a moment) You. Wouldn’t. Dare.
Edward stares, uncertain. He stands, holding the skirt of his trenchcoat up to cover the lower part of his face. He hisses, then runs to the door to dramatically wait for the next stop.
If you would like to participate in this prompt, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a pingback, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post, and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.
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As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a pingback from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.
Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”
The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:
1. Make it one sentence.
2. Try to make it either funny or inspirational.
3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.
4. Add our very cool badge to your post for extra exposure!
When you’ve only had two hours of sleep in each of the last two nights, and you know you’ve got to come up with something for One-Liner Wednesday, but you’ve got nothing and then you think, Oh, I know–I’ll write something witty on the fridge!”
If you would like to participate in this prompt, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a pingback, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post, and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.
NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, like Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.
As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a pingback from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.
Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”
The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:
1. Make it one sentence.
2. Try to make it either funny or inspirational.
3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.
4. Add our very cool badge to your post for extra exposure!
I know I’m a day late for pumpkin day, but this thing is still sitting in my kitchen and I figured if I’ve got to keep looking at it, you should too. Alex HAD to have it, so for $1, it came home with him. The pictures are actually flattering.
It weighs about twice as much as the orange pumpkin
If you would like to participate in this prompt, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a pingback, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post, and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.
NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, like Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.
As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a pingback from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.
Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”
The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:
1. Make it one sentence.
2. Try to make it either funny or inspirational.
3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.
4. Add our very cool badge to your post for extra exposure!
Saturday, October 28th, 8:00pm
Sally (and Passenger One and Passenger Two)
Sally sits at the window. Passengers One and Two take the seats in front of her.
Passenger One: (to Passenger Two) Which brings me to my next question: what are you going for Halloween as this year?
Passenger Two: I told you, I’m going as a sandwich. But I’d like to return to your first question …
Passenger One: What kind?
Passenger Two: What kind of what?
Passenger One: What kind of sandwich are you going as?
Passenger Two: (frowns) It doesn’t matter what kind of sandwich I’m going to go as, I want you to clarify what you meant by your first question.
Passenger One: I wouldn’t go as a peanut butter sandwich if I were you. You’ll have all the dogs in the neighbourhood chasing you.
Passenger Two: (turns and looks Passenger One directly in the eye) Your first question? What did you mean? Don’t make me … (closes eyes and exhales heavily) Okay. I’m not going to get angry …
Passenger One: Baloney.
Passenger Two: (yelling) I’m not! I’m not going to get angry!
Passenger One: Calm down. I meant you can go as a baloney sandwich.
Passenger Two: (still yelling) I’ll sandwich you in a minute!
Sally: (leans forward) If I may …
Passenger Two: (turns to her and yells) What do you want, witch?
Sally: (aghast) I was just going to suggest your friend answer your question. But if you don’t want my help …
Passenger Two: (calmly) Well, thank you. (turns to Passenger One) You see? Even strangers want to know what you meant by your first question.
Sally: Actually, I just want to know what the first question was.
Passenger Two: (to Sally, yelling again) Mind your own business, witch!
Passenger One: (to Passenger Two) Are you quite finished yet?
Passenger Two: (voice raised, anxious) It depends: what do you mean?
Sally: Ahhh …
Passenger Two: (turns) What are you “ahhh”ing about?
Sally: I assume that was the first question you’re referring to.
Passenger One: (turns to Sally) Yes, I’m thinking a Marmite sandwich might be best, too.
I don’t know which planets are aligned or what’s in retrograde, but yesterday my coffee maker broke and I came home to find my laptop wanted me to install an operating system: if you don’t hear from me for a while, you’ll likely find me wandering the streets, Internetless and decaffeinated, looking for a fix.
Here’s some mushrooms I found. …no, I didn’t smoke them.
If you would like to participate in this prompt, feel free to use the “One-Liner Wednesday” title in your post, and if you do, you can ping back here to help your blog get more exposure. To execute a pingback, just copy the URL in the address bar on this post, and paste it somewhere in the body of your post. Your link will show up in the comments below. Please ensure that the One-Liner Wednesday you’re pinging back to is this week’s! Otherwise, no one will likely see it but me.
NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, like Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.
As with Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS), if you see a pingback from someone else in my comment section, click and have a read. It’s bound to be short and sweet.
Unlike SoCS, this is not a prompt so there’s no need to stick to the same “theme.”
The rules that I’ve made for myself (but don’t always follow) for “One-Liner Wednesday” are:
1. Make it one sentence.
2. Try to make it either funny or inspirational.
3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.
4. Add our very cool badge to your post for extra exposure!
lindaghill.com 