Saturday, August 4th, 9:00pm
Edward and Lily
Edward: Why are you in such a bad mood?
Lily: Your psycho girlfriend stole my pet.
Edward: I couldn’t leave him with my Bella. They were getting too friendly. And anyway, she’s not my girlfriend. She’s just a psycho.
Lily: So now you get rid of the psycho AND you still have Bella locked up in my basement. What’s in it for me?
Edward: (thinks a moment) My undying gratitude?
Lily: (stares at him) Not good enough.
Edward: I did distract the cops that time. Doesn’t that count for anything?
Lily: No. You had way too much fun with it. (crosses arms and slouches) You get all the fun. All I get is the whiny, “You’ve got to let me go!” and, “I’ll do anything, just let me go!” all day while I’m trying to get my beauty rest.
Edward: (sits up straight) Anything? She said she’ll do anything?
Lily: (tiredly) Yeah.
Edward: Hmmm …
Lily: What are you thinking?
Edward: (hesitantly) Maybe she doesn’t really want to be with me.
Lily: No! You think?
Edward: Are you being sarcastic?
Lily: No! (rolls eyes)
Edward: Do you think we should let her go?
Lily: You’ll have to wipe out her memory first. You can do that though, right?
Edward hesitates, his eyes shifting back and forth.
Lily: Of course you can.
Edward continues to avoid the question.
Lily: Are you a vampire or not?
Edward: (affronted) Of course I am!
Lily: Then there’s no problem.
Edward: (uncertainly) Right.
Next stop: Sunday, August 5th, 1:00pm